Faelyne: Question. Do you remember four episodes ago when we opened an experiment? Stephanie: We had a hypothesis that the most common, most costly, most misunderstood ADHD communication patterns, the ones that derail friendships before they start, that turn connection attempts into social disasters, the things that leave you lying awake at 3 AM replaying a conversation about a rowing machine that doesn't exist. Faelyne: doesn't exist. Stephanie: That those things could be understood, named, and worked with, not fixed, not suppressed, worked with. Faelyne: We called it the B A I L Bail series. ⁓ Stephanie: Yes, B for blurting, A for arguing, I for interrupting Faelyne: I for interrupting and finally the L for let it go. And no, I am not going to sing it. Stephanie: she wants to so bad though. ⁓ An R for Faelyne: I do. Stephanie: restraint. We acted it out. We dissected the neuroscience. We delivered the protocols. We watched Dakota say "You don't fit in here." to a stranger at the gym and somehow ended up with a friend who says Later, Bro. Faelyne: The data is in. Stephanie: The findings are ready. Faelyne: And today we are closing the experiment. Stephanie: Not because the work is done, but because you have everything you need to keep it running yourself. Faelyne: Hypothesis by hypothesis. Stephanie: Data point by data point. Faelyne: Saw what you did there. One experiment at a time. Stephanie: Also, Dakota finally let the whale sounds be enough. Faelyne: Data supports this. Stephanie: It really does. And everything we covered today, the science, the complete Bail B A I L Toolkit. All twelve protocols from all four episodes lives in the show notes and no writing is required. Just listen. Faelyne: Your working memory does not need to hold this. This is what show notes are for. Stephanie: To the lab, The findings do not present themselves. Faelyne: They really don't. Stephanie: Welcome to the ADHD cringe lab, the only place in the broadcast frequency of the intrawebnets where your most embarrassing moments are considered valuable scientific data. Faelyne: Every week we take one cringy, chaotic, and completely relatable ADHD moment and we put it under the microscope. Stephanie: We act it out, we break down the neuroscience behind it, and we give you actual tools to handle it better the next time. Faelyne: Because understanding why your brain does what it does, well, that's where the shame stops and the strategy starts. Stephanie: I'm Stephanie. This is Faelyne We're two ADHD coaches collecting cringe data in and outside of the lab. Faelyne: Our lives are just one big ADHD scientific experiment. Stephanie: I'm coming to you live from the US research wing. Faelyne: And bonjour, I am joining you from the Canadian Research Wing. Stephanie: Two labs. Faelyne: One mission. Stephanie: Open borders yet equal cringe. Faelyne: And no idea of what actual time it is. Stephanie: And nobody stopped us. Keeping watch over the lab as always. Faelyne: Our chief cringe officer, the ADHD spaghetti bear. Stephanie: He's looking particularly composed today. Looks super chill. Faelyne: Looks like his water glass is still untouched. Stephanie: As it has been for four episodes. Faelyne: He is consistent, but Stephanie: He has standards. Faelyne: Infinite ones. Stephanie: Yeah. Unlike some cats we know. So put on your headgear ⁓ and grab your fidget spinners. Faelyne: And grab your lab grade safety goggles for the findings portion. And I am never without my rubber chicken. Stephanie: So let's start the experiment. Faelyne: Experiment. Stephanie: Nice. Faelyne: So, today's experiment is the fourth and final installment of our BAIL B-A-I-L communication series. We have looked at B, blurting. We have looked at A arguing. And we have looked at I interrupting. I saw what you're doing there. And today is L, let it go. Also didn't sing it. Stephanie: Right. The one that makes all the other protocols possible, the one the whole series was always building towards. Faelyne: One smoothie place with an understated name. HAX ⁓ Stephanie: For the tech bros. Faelyne: For the Tech Bros! ⁓ S'UP! ⁓ S'UP! ⁓ Stephanie: Sup Faelyne: Two new friends, one ADHD brain that is doing the work. And the moment where the data finally comes back the way you hoped it would. Stephanie: Today's experiment may cause unexpected emotion in returning listeners. Faelyne: We have warned you, lab mates. Stephanie: You may feel something when Spaghetti Bear's meter moves. Faelyne: We felt something when we wrote it. Stephanie: Not that we are telling you what happens. Faelyne: The data speaks for itself. Stephanie: So stay curious, stay present, and remember, scientists don't fail experiments. Faelyne: They collect data. Stephanie: Let's start the experiment. Faelyne: Alright, the lab doors are open and we have a transmission from the cringe mailbag that fits so perfectly for this episode that we are convinced that the universe has been listening. Stephanie: The universe has impeccable timing and very good taste, which is making me think that somehow spaghetti bear was involved in this. Faelyne: He is well connected. ⁓ Now, ⁓ this one came in from a listener who calls herself Penelope from Stevenson Ranch, California. ⁓ We are calling her with deep affection and full cringe survivor recognition ⁓ Failure to Launch. ⁓ Stephanie: Failure to Launch. Welcome to the lab. Faelyne: Okay, so f Penelope Failure to Launch says, ⁓ So, okay, I've been listening to the BAIL series from the beginning, and last week I very much thank you. ⁓ Stephanie: Thank you. Faelyne: I was at dinner with my best friend and she was telling me about this thing that had happened at work, and I could feel the yeah but loading, like physically in my chest. ⁓ I had a whole thing ready about how she should have handled it differently with data, with a framework, with ⁓ at least three examples from my own life, and then I just didn't. I asked her what happened next instead. And she talked for like ten minutes. And at the end she looked at me and said, You're such a good listener. And I almost told her about the yeah, but that I didn't say, and then I didn't do that either. I just said thank you and sat with it. And it felt like the weirdest, most uncomfortable, but most correct thing I've ever done. Stephanie: Aw She almost told her about the yeah but, but she didn't say. Faelyne: And then she didn't do that either. That's amazing. Stephanie: Yeah, two catches in one dinner. Faelyne: Failure to Launch that is not a small thing. ⁓ That is the experiment working exactly as designed. The hypothesis ran, ⁓ the data came back, ⁓ the debrief happened quietly in real time, ⁓ and you filed it instead of spiraling on it. ⁓ Stephanie: You're such a good listener. That is your result. That is what the experiment was for. Faelyne: File it. Don't spiral Spaghetti Bear has the trademark. And you have the data. ⁓ And if you want to stick around later, ⁓ we'll share our own personal cringe fession that happened when we were developing this episode. And it's a doozy. ⁓ Life imitating Stephanie: Hm. Faelyne: art, imitating life, imitating art. ⁓ Anyway, you know what I mean. ⁓ Stephanie: Yeah, I'm still stuck on you calling this art. But okay. Faelyne: So, we should head into the lab. Stephanie: Let's do it. Okay, I think we're ready. Faelyne: Define ready. Stephanie: We've been working together for a few months now, and in that time, I've watched you go from not knowing why your brain does what it does to actually understanding it. That's not small Dakota. You know the patterns. You know what fires before the blurt, before the arguing before the interruption. You've been running experiments. Faelyne: You know what? I have. Stephanie: And Faelyne: The data is getting better. Stephanie: So Raven is on her way. You don't need me here for this one. Faelyne: What if I yeah butt her? Stephanie: Then you catch it. Name the broadcast. Hold the frequency. Faelyne: What if I interrupt her? Stephanie: Dakota, feel the signal. Run the check. Clear the transmission. If you need it. Faelyne: What if I blurt something completely unhinged about a piece of gym equipment that doesn't even exist? Stephanie: Well that one is on you. Faelyne: Fair. Stephanie: Okay, Dakota, what do you know about your brain that you did not know four months ago? Faelyne: Okay, that it moves fast, that it broadcasts before the check runs, that it connects through contribution, that sometimes lands wrong, that the yeah, but isn't meanness, it's analysis, that the interruption isn't rudeness, it's a full signal with an understaffed dump button. that the repair matters more than the perfect conversation and that I am not broken. I'm I'm just Stephanie: There's a lot happening in there. Faelyne: Most of the time. Stephanie: Pretty much always. And Faelyne: and I am working with it and it's actually kind of remarkable in there sometimes. Stephanie: Indeed, run the experiment. Faelyne: Okay, inhibitory control deficit, talk button already down, not a choice, a transmission. Let me keep looking what I've written down here. okay, working memory drops the original signal, okay, so it's not forgetting its interference. Alright then, what's next? contradiction reflex. It is analysis, not aggression. Okay, I can do this. The brain stress testing out loud. Signal gap. Okay, two broadcasts, two different frequencies. Neither person can hear the other clearly until someone names it. Next page, hmm, the repair instinct, okay, let me the ADHD antenna, tuning and signals just as designed, and then there is a lot happening in here most of the time. Pretty much always. Huh, and I am working with it. Yeah, I can do this. Hey s'up? Stephanie: S'up? Ooh Faelyne: Mm-hmm. Stephanie: How are you? Faelyne: Sup, you made it. Stephanie: Yeah, sorry the blend visionary tried to upsell me on the new cognitive surge protocol on the way in. And he mentioned his C suite chapter. Faelyne: Was it the Pacific Northwest one? Stephanie: Is there another one? Faelyne: There is not Stephanie: so I have to tell you, my cat Eddie knocked down my phone right off the nightstand, three AM. Full eye contact. Completely deliberate. Faelyne: Okay, dominance behavior explanation queuing up, territorial instinct, the whole neurological framework. Right, let me look, look, look, check. is this the moment for information or for staying? Let me think, let me think, stay, stay. So, Eddie Stephanie: It was a dramatic fall. It was a four foot drop. slow motion. He watched the whole way down. Faelyne: That is truly impressive commitment. Stephanie: Right? Like respect the dedication at least. Yeah. Faelyne: Totally. Totally. Stephanie: I've been thinking about the school thing, about going back. Faelyne: Just run this internal check, ID, broadcast loaning, ROI analysis, skills inventory, financial framework, all of it's queuing up in my head right now. Okay, let me do the check. What is she actually sending? Okay, she's not asking for analysis. She's not asking to be solved. She's asking to be heard. Alright, so that calls for hold frequency. Alright. Yeah? Huh. Where are you with it? Stephanie: I don't know. still scared, but like good scared? Like the kind where you're scared because it actually matters. Faelyne: Good scared is data. Stephanie: Yeah, it really is. well I slept really well last night. I went back to the Whale Sounds playlist. Faelyne: Okay, broadcast loading. Listen, I know this is about phase three sleep and frequency and consistency. The whole thing is right here and it would help her so much. Okay, check. Alright. She told me twice. She told me clearly. Whale sounds help her. That is her data. Okay, that is enough. Let it be enough. I can do this. Good Raven. I am so glad it works for you. Stephanie: You're not gonna tell me about phase three sleep? Faelyne: Mm nope. Stephanie: Who are you and what have you done with Dakota? Faelyne: I'm still me. There's just a lot happening in the control room. And I'm learning to run an internal check before I go live. Stephanie: You you seem different today. Faelyne: Mm, different how? Stephanie: dunno, just here, like you're actually here. Faelyne: I I have been working on something. Stephanie: The ADHD stuff? Faelyne: Yeah, turns out there's a lot happening in the old control room over here. Stephanie: I know. Faelyne: You know? Stephanie: I've always known. That's why I told you my name. Faelyne: at the gym after all of that. Stephanie: You noticed I wiped down the bench. Nobody notices that. There was clearly a lot happening in there. And I wanted to know that. Well, same time next week. Faelyne: Yeah, but Nope. Yeah. Same time next week. S'up! Stephanie: Later bro! Faelyne: Later, bro! There's a lot happening in here. Most of the time. Hmm, pretty much always. And I'm good. Stephanie: All right, lab coats back on. What you just witnessed was not a miracle. It was not a personality transplant. It was not Dakota suddenly becoming a different person. What you watched was the same brain, fast, full, activated, remarkable, making different choices. And there is a very specific science for why that is now possible that wasn't possible four episodes ago. Faelyne: But before we get into it, we want to name what this episode actually is because the Bale series has been building to this moment since episode 10, blurting, arguing, interrupting, and here we are, L. Let it go. Which we want to be very clear, it's not about suppression, not about shrinking, and not about making your brain smaller or quieter or more palatable for others. Stephanie: Let it go is about releasing the outcome, entering a conversation as a scientist rather than a defendant, curious about what actually happens instead of terrified of what might. And that shift from defendant to scientist is the most significant neurological reframe available to an HD, ADHD brain working on its communication patterns. Faelyne: And it has a name. Dr. Stephanie Sarkis, whose research on ADHD in relationships is some of the most practically grounded in the field, describes this as moving from threat-based processing to curiosity-based processing. The ADHD brain in a social situation is often running a threat assessment. Will I say something wrong? Will I lose this person? Will this go sideways? And in that threat assessment. Assessment itself is what makes things go sideways. Because a brain running threat assessments is not a brain that can hold frequency. It's a brain that's broadcasting survival signals at full volume. Stephanie: And curiosity turns the threat assessment off. Not permanently and not perfectly, but enough. Enough to find the over button, enough to run the check, enough to choose. Faelyne: Point one, the chemistry of connection. And we mean that in both senses of the word. Stephanie: At the neurological level, every positive social interaction, every moment of genuine connection, every conversation where the signal lands cleanly triggers a release of dopamine. For the ADHD brain, which is chronically undersupplied with dopamine, that release is just just not just pleasant, it is regulatory and good conversation is literally medicine for the ADHD nervous system. Faelyne: But but here's the paradox. The ADHD communication patterns that we've spent four episodes dissecting, the blurt, the yeah, but, the interruption, those patterns exist in part because the brain is chasing that dopamine hit. The debate is stimulating, the redirect is activating, the fast brain doing what it was built to do, seeking novelty, seeking engagement, seeking that chemical reward of connection. Stephanie: Dr. John Ratey's work on the ADHD brain and neurochemistry is foundational here. He describes the ADHD nervous system as essentially running a different chemical equation than a neurotypical brain, more sensitive to dopamine fluctuations, more dependent on novelty and stimulation to regulate, and more prone to what he calls the activation reward loop. The brain activates, it seeks stimulation, it gets a hit of engagement from the debate or the redirect, and it wants more. And the conversation becomes about the activation rather than the connection. Faelyne: Which is why these protocols work. Not because they suppress the ADHD brain, because they redirect the activation. Name the broadcast is activating. You are doing something. Hold frequency, also activating. You're generating a question, listening to the answer, processing the data. Run the experiment is activating. You just have a hypothesis that you're collecting results about. brain is still moving. It's just moving towards connection instead of away from it. Stephanie: And point two, the neuroscience of letting go and why it is harder for ADHD brains than anyone gives them credit for. Faelyne: Dr. Russell Barclay's research on ADHD and emotional regulation describes the ADHD brain's relationship with unresolved stimulation. So the brain that's locked on to a debate, a position, a yeah, but that brain is not choosing to stay there. It's experiencing something that's closer to withdrawal when it tries to leave. The stimulation was real, the engagement was real. The neurochemical Reward for being activated in that conversation was real, and releasing it feels like a loss. Stephanie: Which is why just let it go has never worked. You cannot logic your way out of a neurochemical event. The whale sounds argument was not about whale sounds. It was about a brain that was activated and cannot find the exit ramp without a tool. And that is what Lock and Locate the Launchpad's nearest exit was built for. That is what the protocols are for. Not willpower, not just trying harder, a different neurological pathway to the same destination. Faelyne: And here is something that the ADHD community is beginning to talk about more. Some researchers and advocates are now using the term V.A.S.T. variable attention stimulus trait, to reframe what we call ADHD. Not a deficit, not a disorder of attention, a variability, a different relationship with stimulation, novelty, and engagement. And when you understand ADHD through that lens, Letting go isn't just about fixing a broken brain. It's about learning to work with a variable one. Dakota's brain was never broken. It was variable. And now it has tools. Stephanie: Point three, experiment and practice. And this is the one that ties the whole B.A.I.L. series together. Faelyne: In episode ten , We introduced protocol for run the experiment at the end of the blurting episode. We talked about a student that Stephanie worked with who reframed social interactions, not as tests to pass or fail, but as experiments to run. Hypothesis, data, debrief. The scientific layer gave him something the anxiety couldn't touch. Objectivity. He wasn't a kid failing at social interactions. He was a researcher. researcher collecting data on social interactions. Stephanie: what Dakota was doing at HAX today. She was running the experiment. She had a hypothesis. I know what my broadcast does. I know what fires before the blurt, before the yeah, but the interruption. I know when the signal loads. And I want to know what happens if I run the check before I transmit. Faelyne: And that is a completely different psychological position than the one she was in when she was at the gym in episode 10. She is not trying not to mess up. She's trying to find out what happens. Those are two completely different neurological states. One is threat-based, one is curiosity-based. And curiosity-based brains make better decisions. They form better connections. And this part matters, they actually enjoy the experiment. Stephanie: The freeze frames you watched were Dakota's hypotheses running in real time. Eddie the cat, broadcast loading, check, stay. The school thing, broadcast loading, check, hold frequency. The whale sounds, broadcast loading. This one is harder, check, let it be enough. Each one a data point. Each one a result. Each one proof that the brain can choose. Faelyne: And the data from today's experiment, the connection that was possible when the broadcast ran the check first, Raven noticed. She said, You're actually here. That is the result. That is what the experiment was for. Stephanie: Point four the human chemistry and this one is for Raven. Faelyne: Because Raven has been in this series since episode 10, and we have spent a lot of time in Dakota's brain. We want to spend a little time in Raven's because what Raven did across those four episodes is something that really deserves its own scientific recognition. Stephanie: Raven experienced the blurt, "You don't fit in here", and filed it away as interesting rather than offensive. She experienced the yeah buts, the almonds, the coconut milk, the whale sounds, the hot dog, and stayed. She got quieter, she offered smaller things, but she stayed and she told Dakota her day. Faelyne: Dr. R. Tuckman's work on ADHD and relationships describes this as the single most important variable in an ADHDer's social development. Finding people whose instinctive response to your signal is curiosity rather than rejection. Not people who don't notice the pattern, people who notice it and choose to stay anyway. Because something in the signal, underneath the noise, told them it was worth it. Worth it. Stephanie: Raven said herself, you noticed I wiped down the bench. Nobody notices that. The ADHD brain, the same brain that cannot always hold the talk button, that loses a signal amid apology, that runs hotter than anyone around it. That brain also notices everything, the bench. Other things people walk by. Faelyne: That is the ADHD antenna running exactly as designed. And Raven felt it. Before Dakota had any language for what her brain was doing, before the protocols, before the coach, before so much research that she undertook on her own, Raven felt the signal underneath the noise, and she chose to tune in. Stephanie: Human chemistry is not logical. It does not wait for the protocols to be in place. It fires on instinct, on pattern recognition, on something the nervous system knows before the brain catches up. And the ADHD nervous system, sensitive, fast, tuned to frequencies other people miss, is remarkably good at generating that signal. Faelyne: Dakota's brain was always capable of this connection. It just needed the tools to stop getting in its own way long enough for this to happen. Stephanie: Yeah, and point five, the identity shift. And this is a point that the B.A.I.L. series was always building toward. Faelyne: In episode 10, Dakota said, There's a lot happening in here, most of the time, pretty much always. And she said it with bewilderment, with mild self-deprecation, with the particular exhaustion of someone who spent years not understanding why their brain does what it does. Stephanie: But today she said it differently, not louder, not with more confidence in the performed sense, quieter actually, more settled, like someone who has stopped fighting the weather and just learned to read it. Faelyne: Hmm. Dr. Edward Hallowell has written extensively about ADHD identity. Not the cat. Stephanie: Not the cat. Faelyne: No, Dr. Edward Hallowell, not the cat. Has written extensively about ADHD identity and about the moment when the diagnosis stops being a sentence and starts being a map. So when the understanding of why your brain does what it does shifts the relationship with yourself from adversarial to collaborative. That shift is not instant. It is hypothesis by hypothesis, data point by data point. It builds one experiment at a time. Stephanie: And the ADHD community has a term for this that is gaining real traction. ADHD self-acceptance. Not toxic positivity, not ADHD is a superpower. Something quieter and more honest than that. The acknowledgement that the brain you have is the brain you have. And that is a variable. It's not broken. It is remarkable in ways that are sometimes inconvenient. There's a lot happening in there. Most of the time, pretty much always. Faelyne: And that you are good. Stephanie: That is the whole series right there. Faelyne: Which is exactly what the protocol was always for. Stephanie: So if you watched that skit and felt something shift. Faelyne: If you recognize Dakota's Freeze, the broadcast loading, the checklist running, the choice. Stephanie: If you've ever been in a conversation and caught yourself mid, yeah, but and held it even once, even imperfectly. Faelyne: If you've ever been Raven, the one who stayed, the one who noticed, the one whose instincts knew something was worth showing up for, even before the other person did. Stephanie: If you've ever been Dakota at the end, alone at the table, "good". Faelyne: The science explains the journey, but it doesn't sit with you in the quiet after. That's what we are about to do. Stephanie: Welcome to the validation station. Faelyne: Here is what I want you to know about the BAIL series. We didn't spend four episodes on blurting, arguing, interrupting, and letting go because your communication is broken. No. We spent four episodes on it because your brain deserves a framework that actually matches how it works. Not a zillion sticky notes, not just, "Hey, you should think before you speak". Not willpower dressed up as advice. Stephanie: A framework that starts with the neuroscience and ends with the choice, that treats your brain as a variable instrument rather than a defective one, that gives you the tools to be present with people you actually care about, not by becoming someone else, but by getting out of your own way long enough to let the connection happen. Faelyne: And If you have been doing the work, running the protocols, catching the broadcasts, holding the frequency, clearing the transmission, and running the experiments, we want you to hear this clearly. That work is hard. It's not as visible as other kinds of hard. Nobody gives you a medal for not yeah, butting someone about their smoothie, and nobody sees the freeze frame inside your head, and nobody knows about the internal broadcast check that ran in the half second before you said, Good, I'm glad it works for you about the whale sounds. Stephanie: But you know, and the people who matter, the Ravens in your life, feel it, even when they can't name it, even before you have the language for it yourself. They felt the signal underneath the noise and they chose to stay. And now you're learning to send a cleaner signal, not a different one, a cleaner one. Faelyne: And for those of you who are still in the early experiments, who caught the blurt but not the yeah, but, or who held frequency once but lost it twice, who made the repair call and the apology interrupted 17 times by yourself, that's data. It's not evidence against you. It is data for you to analyze. Stephanie: Scientists don't fail experiments, they collect data. Faelyne: Dakota started this series not knowing what her brain was doing. She ended it as the researcher. That arc is available to every single person listening to this right now. Stephanie: You are not too much. You are not broken. You are variable. and variable brains, fast, full, activated, tuned to frequencies other people miss, are capable of the most remarkable connections. Faelyne: There's a lot happening in there. Stephanie: Most of the time, Faelyne: Pretty much always. Stephanie: And you are good. Faelyne: You are good. Stephanie: All right, cringe contingent. We are going to do something different for the protocols today because this is the finale of the BAIL series and the protocols from all four episodes build on each other. So we're gonna give you the complete system, the full experiment kit, everything you need. Faelyne: All of this is in the show notes, all four episodes' protocol. The complete bail toolkit, if you will, because future you is gonna need them, and future you will absolutely not remember where they are. Stephanie: We know this about you. We know this about ourselves. Faelyne: Yeah we do. So the Bail Communication Series. Four patterns, twelve protocols. Twelve, twelve. I know, but stick with us here. Stephanie: Yeah. Faelyne: One underlying principle. Stephanie: Okay, here go. From episode 10, blurting, protocol one, "name the broadcast", feel the pre-transmission signal before it goes live. Protocol two, "drop the script", release the rehearsed response, and receive what's actually being said. Protocol three, "the one beat rule", one beat of receiving before transmitting. Protocol four, "run the experiment", form a hypothesis, collect data, debrief. Scientists don't fail experiments, they collect data. Faelyne: Now, from episode 11, arguing. Protocol 1. "Hold the launch". Feel the signal. Name it internally. Run the go or no go check. Then protocol 2. "Q before S". Question before statement. One genuine question before you offer your version. Protocol 3. "Lock and locate" the launch pad's nearest exit. Name the lock. Find the one true thing. Abort. Stop talking. Let the silence do its job. Stephanie: From episode 12, interrupting. Protocol 1, "Name the broadcast". Same foundation, different signal. Feel the pre-transmission hum before it goes live. Protocol 2, "Hold the frequency". One genuine question before you switch from receiving to sending. Stay on their channel for one more beat. Protocol three, "Clear transmission". One clean repair sentence, then stop transmitting. The repair lives in the sentence. Faelyne: And from today, let it go, which is not a protocol in the traditional sense. It is the condition that makes all the other protocols possible. Stephanie: Release the outcome. Enter the conversation as a scientist, not a defendant, curious about what actually happens instead of terrified what might. Free up the bandwidth that was running the threat assessment, the catastrophizing, the predicting, the white knuckling around how it goes, and redirect it towards actually being present in the moment with the person in front of you. Faelyne: Form a hypothesis, run the experiment, collect the data, debrief, adjust for the next hypothesis. Stephanie: And over time the hypotheses get more accurate. They the self awareness gets sharper, the broadcast fa check gets faster, and the connection gets cleaner. They build on each other. Faelyne: Hypothesis by hypothesis. Data point by data point. One experiment at a time. Stephanie: Complete B.A.I.L. toolkit is in the show notes, all 12 protocols, but one underlying principle. Scientists don't fail experiments, they Faelyne: Collect data. Stephanie: Nice. And now we want your B.A.I.L. transmission. The experiment you ran, the broadcast you caught, the yeah, but you held. The repair that got you through even when it was messy. Faelyne: Or the one that didn't work yet. The hypothesis that needs adjusting, the experiment that returned unexpected data. We want that one too. Science isn't just the wins, it's all of it. Stephanie: Email us @TheADHDSpaghettiBear.com The the is required. S B, he monitors all of the transmissions coming in and he has standards. Faelyne: Yes he does. Or you can click the link in the description below to submit a cringefession using our cringefession form. Anonymous submissions are always welcome. Stephanie: Experiment concluded. series concluded, the BAIL Communication Series. Four episodes, four patterns, twelve protocols, one principle is complete. B is for blurting, the transmission that gets out before the check runs. Name the broadcast, drop the script, the one beat rule, run the experiment. Faelyne: And A, arguing, the yeah, but, the hill, the cognitive lock, hold the launch, QB4S, lock and locate the launch pad's nearest exit. Stephanie: I interrupting the talk button already down, the seven second delay with the understaffed dump button. Name the broadcast, hold the frequency, clear the transmission. Faelyne: L, let it go. Release the outcome. Enter curious. Run the experiment. Collect the data. Adjust the hypothesis. Stephanie: Dakota started this series not knowing what her brain was doing, and she ended it as the researcher. "Good". At HAX with her smoothie and her coach and a friend who told her her name at their gym at the rowing machine that doesn't exist. Faelyne: The ADHD brain is not broken. It's variable. Fast, full, activated, tuned to frequencies other people miss. It is a lot happening in there, most of the time. Pretty much always. Stephanie: And it is capable of the most authentic connections when it learns to run the check before it goes live. Faelyne: The complete Bail Toolkit is in the show notes. All 12 protocols, all the science, all the show notes. No writing required. Stephanie: The laundry is still in the dryer, the whale sounds are still playing, the hot dog is still not a sandwich. Faelyne: Mission control confirms. Stephanie: Over and out. Faelyne: Yeah. Listen, if the lab has been your kind of frequency for the last four episodes, Hit follow. Right now while the signal is still strong. Stephanie: Future you will not remember to come back and find us. We know this about you. We know this about ourselves. Faelyne: And if the B.A.I.L. series gave you language for something you've been living without words for, leave us a review. 30 Seconds from You helps another ADHD brain find us. Stephanie: Every follow, every review, every share puts us in front of someone who needs to hear that that their brain is not broken. Faelyne: It's variable and it's remarkable. Stephanie: We'll be here. Faelyne: In the lab. Stephanie: Holding frequency. nice. Faelyne: Holding frequency. So close. Stephanie: Very close.