Technical Difficultys 01: I do the cha cha. I like a do the cha cha cha cha. What's up, Fat Pack? Happy Friday. I'm sitting here with my co-host Corey. I'm sitting here with my co-host Gary. And you are listening to the Still Fat Podcast. What's going on, man? you know, just ready to record some podcasts, have some fun. A lot of great stuff happened this week. We got some good ideas. This is great. A lot of lots have been going on lately. Actually, been laughing all day to get myself prepared for this and my life. So it's fun. It's fun. How about you, man? Anything fun? Yeah. not really new, but back to the old same old same old as far as day to days we're getting back into streaming so that's a a fun editing process for Corey to learn how to not say bad words that are in there and and it's also not okay to ask hey can I say deleted word in the sentence. Yeah you probably shouldn't you you know what next time just text me it's gonna be really funny though when you read your text like no Cory you can't fucking say Damn it. Well, now who said it? Me. But it's fine. If I get me banned, if you get me banned, it's totally different. Yeah, I'm the asshole then. You are the asshole then. Well, did you have a good day at work today? I did, man. It was a busy day. It was a lot of excitement. I got to think about this for most of the day, but not as much as I want to. Yeah. But no, man, it was a good day. We moved some metal, have some fun. It's just nice to stay busy, you know. It keeps the day go by fast. I work eleven, twelve hour days. So I'll tell you what, man, if you're sitting there doing nothing but sticking your thumb up your ass, that twelve hours feels a lot like a hundred and eighty four. Yeah. It's a good number. Yeah. It feels a lot like that. But today went by quick before I know it was like five o'clock, I better start getting ready for my podcast. Go so gotta be honest, I woke at four o'clock this morning. no shit. yeah, no, because you text me like early this morning. Yeah. I was already I by that time I was already up for two hours, So I texted you six. So yeah, I was up since four. I didn't even go to bed till three thirty. Did you really? Yeah, I was up all night. I think I passed out at one and woke back up and it was like bingo. This is what we're fucking doing today. Okay. Okay. Yeah, cool. Great. I need to do research for the podcast anyway. So I did that and I I got everything together and then I changed a bunch of shit for us. So, you know, today's gonna be a little different. We're gonna structure things a little different. Hope everybody likes that. But yeah, lot of computer work this morning and then and then noon thirty, one o'clock whirled around and I was just like, what do I do now? And so I just sat there and I put together more playlists 'cause it reminds me of the Nate Burgazzi joke when he's talking about like flying in somewhere super early. So he's up at six AM. He's usually up at like noon and he's like, Lunch isn't until forever. What are you What do you guys do all morning? This sucks so eat breakfast. Eat breakfast. You don't have to wait till fucking lunch. Also, this is a free country. You can you can get fat in the morning and then get fat in the in the middle of the day and then get fat at the end of the day. It's a free country for a reason. America. America. Speaking of America, we do know that these episodes come out on Friday, but today does happen to be Veterans Day. So I would like to give a very big shout out to my mother, who is a veteran and the most badass woman I know. So happy Veterans Day, Mom. You'll see this on Friday, but we are recording it on Veterans Day. So And happy Veterans Day to all veterans. Thank you for your service. Thank you for your service. Yeah, anyway, like I said, it's Wednesday. You are recording this, so happy Veterans Day. But it also happens to be Friday the 13th. When this comes out, yeah. This comes out. When you guys are watching this live and we're watching it live and not recording it live, it is Friday the thirteenth, which as we all know is one of those superstitious holidays. everybody thinks it's unlucky. Considered one of the unluckiest days of the year. Well, like you know, like hotels in Florida, they don't even put a thirteenth floor in. Hotels all over. Yeah, it's yeah, hotels in Florida, hotels in Vegas everywhere. You know what I mean? No thirteenth floor 'cause it's unlucky. I I get that when it was eighteen ninety four. But like now we're like twenty twenty-six people. You're an adult it's still the thirteenth floor. Just because you don't call it the fucking thirteenth floor. Numerically doesn't matter. Just because you walked from twelve to fourteen doesn't mean you actually skipped a fucking floor. We're still on the thirteenth floor. But it's fucking crazy too, because there's no actual definitive answer on where the unlucky thirteenth came from. You know what I mean? There's a ton of ideas and everything like that, but no definitive answer on what it came from, you know. I actually thought about the hotel thing when When I was doing all this this morning and I was like, hey, what if they made the thirteenth floor and just completely did everything, completely furnished it, did everything, and then just sealed it the fuck off. Doesn't have an entrance from the elevator, from the stairwell, from nothing. And then you're in the stairwell and you think, hey, you're just gonna be in the next door, and it's not. It's fucking concrete. That sucks. That would be great. An extra couple hundred thousand dollars just to do it. Well, at least at least because then floor fourteen isn't the actual fucking unlucky one, We're going from twelve to thirteen to fourteen, but we're you can't enter thirteen. And the interesting part is like level one lobby, right? Yeah. So it's still just fucking counting up. It's not if there's a basement, does that mean like I mean technically the four is the thirteenth floor? Yeah. Thirteenth floor. In my opinion, that's how it works in my head. I know it probably doesn't work how Like that in anybody else's happy. We definitely gotta Google that too. Be how many people have died on the 13th floor of a of a hotel? And they're like, actually, there's never been a 13th floor. Then how do you know it's bad? What if that's where everybody wins? Right? Nobody gets pregnant, nobody ODs. It's just the 13th floor is where the magic happens at, and they're keeping it away from us. That's where all the we're just gonna say rich people go. But I mean it like I said, there's no definitive answer for it. But it's kinda interesting though there's all these different types of ideas. I thought one of the interesting ones is the Last Supper, big Christianity one. okay, I'm gonna pause you on that. Okay, because I did Google it right as you I'm gonna fucking Google it. No specific real world building or historical event has official record of deaths tied strictly to a thirteenth floor. So it's just literally something they made up out of nothing and ran with it forever. Yeah. So anyway, speaking of that and religion, the Last Supper, right? Yeah. So Jesus Christ shared his final meal, 12, you know, plus Jesus equals 13. Right. Judas, obviously the bad guy, suck in the guests. He's the reason why Jesus died and crucified. Also, he was crucified on Friday. Right. So, 13 guests there, Friday. I've seen a lot of controversy where it's not just 13, it's it has a lot to do with Friday and 13. So it has to be those two days. Yeah. Well, 'cause thirteen hasn't always been exactly what I would consider an unlucky number, right? But it's it's a baker's dozen. Nobody's mad at the extra donut. No. Fuck no. You mean I get you mean I get one more donut? Thirteenth's fantastic. Which is great because my wife likes sprinkles and I don't like sprinkles. So like half of those have sprinkles, and if I get a th fucking thirteenth that doesn't have sprinkles, you win. Fuck winning for the day. Fuck yeah. Winning for the month, honestly. Well, Jesus isn't the only God that they're they're talking about. So in Norse mythology, Loki and the thirteenth guest. So a popular retelling describes that twelve gods attended the banquet, right? There's twelve gods, yeah. Yeah. But Loki supposedly arrived as the unwanted thirteenth, And so his his interference led to the death of Baldur. Which Brought upon Ragnarok. Ragnarok. Yep. So that's that's the crazy part about that. So I don't know if you know this or not, but Norse mythology and Christianity have more similarities than anything we could do a two hour podcast and still not even touch the surface of it. Yeah. I'm not that big of a nerd. There's a lot of beliefs that Christianity is just post Ragnarok doomsday, tons of things with it. So Christianity had its own doomsday, dude. Do you remember the Crusades? So the shit was crazy. So Loki, who ended up being the person that, you know, called Baldir to die, right? The bringer of light, was Judas in the story of the Last Supper. So there's some saying about it, 'cause like the only thing that's ever actually killed Loki was Ragnarok, but there's also a lot of Speculations that, being the trickster that he is, the mischievous man that he is, right is he didn't actually die. He escaped back back to his daughter's little hell realm. Well, he's in the movies, so he's definitely here. Yeah, so Garden of Eden where they ate their apple that made them live for a thousand years. Yeah. That's actually where the Norse gods got their power from was the Idans orchard I'm probably butchering the names. And that's where the apples grew that gave the Norse the powers they had, wow. and then it goes the son of God, Jesus, you know, getting killed and resurrecting. Same exact story. Right. it goes down to The turning water into wine in order to drink the blood of, your gods and stuff like that. it's fucking crazy. But that's definitely one of them that you're like, that could be pretty interesting. It's it's definitely a good story. Definitely something cool to look into. I'm not super into it, but I like something that I'm like, fuck, that does sound a lot of like. I'm just saying if Loki is the trickster he is, he could rewrite history to where he is the one and only God. Fuck yeah. Yeah. And then he just killed everybody off. Wait a second. I'm still on the edge here because I thought he was a frost giant. Well, the the flood, that was Ark story and everything. And quite literally they used a flood to kill off the giants that were the only enemies of the gods for North Absol. I mean, it's one day, man, if you ever want to dig into it, you're gonna fucking wow, this is a cool movie. Marvel's got this right, Another historic Friday. So Friday, October thirteenth, thirteen seven, the Knights Templar, Okay. So King Philip the Fourth of France ordered a mass arrest of the Knights Templar. Many were imprisoned, tortured, and some even executed, but a popular theory claims that this event made Friday the thirteenth the unlucky number that it is today. that why Caesar's palace? Did he actually live here? Yeah, I I thought this wasn't real. Yeah. I fucking love that movie. I wonder if they don't release a lot of movies on Friday to 13th and horror movies because they don't wanna ruin their bad luck. It's just like when you build a new ship or a boat, right? You have to break the wine on the it's that's the superstition of it. So if it doesn't break, that fucking ship's gonna sink. no, so I mean obviously we've moved farther into, you know, the modern day Friday and the unlucky number thirteenth. So what do you got on that? there's just some crazy things that happen, it happens all the time. Like I said, the building skipping the thirteenth war blows my mind. every year, no matter what, has one Friday, the thirteenth. At least one. At least one. I don't know how the fucking calendar works because it's all made up. But it's what are the fucking odds, every single one of them. thirteenth club founded in New York, 1882. Members deliberately challenge superstitions by gathering groups of thirteen walking under ladders and breaking supposedly unlucky rules. So so they're they're doing all the superstitions that you're not supposed to do. Yeah. It's it's kind of like just rubbing it in your face, like and you know, again, we're going back to Norse mythology. You know how a lot of people fucking died? They just intentionally pissed off the gods, you know? But we don't know. I mean, we didn't look into those stories. What if all those people walking under ladders and stuff like that? And they're like the next year they were still okay. Seven days later they get struck by one of three cars in the whole eighteen hundreds. Yeah. So interestingly enough, there is a fear of Friday the thirteenth Perusca V deca triaphobia. What? Hey, how are you? Exactly, dude. I Googled it and and it's a real thing. the meaning of it is. the fear of Friday the thirteenth. Of the number thirteen or just Friday the thirteenth? Friday the thirteenth. It's that fucking big. They've actually named it as a phobia. Yeah. well, there's a phobia for everything. Yeah. We talked about the killer yellow. Yeah. What do you think people do on Friday the thirteenth? Just sleep? Like pretend it doesn't exist? A lot of people don't go outside. A lot of people don't even like acknowledge that it's existing. You know, so they're like, All right, cool. I'm just gonna sit here in my bed, scroll on Facebook. Well, it's funny too. I mean, imagine it. That's just us, right? So Friday the thirteenth is an us thing, but in Italy they're afraid of Friday the seventeenth. Yeah. Which let's be honest, that does not sound nearly as intimidating and Italy's a bunch of pussies. Yeah, thirteen thirteen definitely sounds more like a giga chad fucking number. I don't think seventeen has soft. Yeah, seventeen's soft. Well seven eight nine, you know. Pussy ass. Well we saved your ass in World War One and two. hey, if they take a break for Christmas on war, maybe they can take a break on Friday the thirteenth. They're like, hey, I don't want I don't want like my grenade just blowing up on my hip. I'm not going out. Yeah, we're just gonna stay They're gonna storm us. No, they're scared too, man. Yeah. We'll get it back on the seventeenth, don't worry. But I mean we've believed in stupid shit forever, I'm in the car business, and we have like certain superstitions like I personally hate whenever like my bosses say, All right, let's have a big day. We're not doing fucking shit. Yeah, you just fucking ruined the I literally just every time it happens, my eyes just roll in the back of my head. I was like, You motherfucker. We need to we need to make five car sales a day. well, we're gonna do one. Thank you. If you didn't say that. But on a trivial Thursday, we'll do eight. But as long as you don't say I like the reverse psychology on that where's like if at the beginning of the day, you'd be like, All right, let's do shit. Yeah. Yeah. You know what? Don't try too hard today, you guys. Just relax, enjoy yourselves. and literally break a leg. One of the superstitions in the car business is if you make plans. with your significant other, you got a kid's birthday party to go to, you're gonna be stuck fucking late. Yep. Something's gonna happen. And it's like we obviously write all our deals up on the board. And if you write the first two deals in red and then you switch it to blue, done. You're not that's the end of the car day. You can't do it. But if you do red, blue, green, yellow, it's okay. As long as you don't do two consecutive numbers or or you write sold before they're actually out of the paper. just stupid shit like that, Yeah, because then the bank's gonna come back and be like, Hey, no. And this is serious, you People will get fucking saplers thrown at them when they grab the wrong color. no, the fucking first two were in green. The rest of them for the day will be in green. The fact that you held a blue marker might mean we're fucking done for the day. This is your fault. Go home. So we we obviously do a lot of stupid stupers as as people, but I mean, look at like pro sports players, you know, gotta wear the same pair of socks. Yeah. Yeah, I can't these are my game socks. Every game day I gotta wear these if we don't win. Like, well, y'all still fucking lose. I think the only one that I that I don't like is the whole breaking a mirror thing. But I think it's just because I'm a man and I don't want to have to fucking clean up a broken mirror. And you're gonna miss one little piece. It's gonna get in your foot. It's just gonna be bad. No and and I'm actually I'm scared of that. Like so if you break a plate in the fucking kitchen, I'm wearing shoes in the kitchen for the next fucking week, dude. What about seven year penalty for that? Yeah. Which again, seven still sounds scarier than seventeen. Just want to make sure seven seven still seven. What if it was thirteen years? Yeah, thirteen years. Because then it would all correlate. No, I'm pretty sure it's about chewing gum. I feel like there's some. Shit, don't fucking swallow your gum. Swallow your gum. That's right. Yeah. Thirteen years of med left. Yeah. What the fuck is wrong with you? But what about black cats? I don't like cats in general. So And he doesn't like black in general either. So That's not even close to the truth. I am black. I don't know if you can this is this camera's kind of fucked up, but I am black. Really good lights in here. Yeah. It's great. Actually changes our both our pigment tone. If you didn't know, Corey's also smowing. But so you so you don't ever have any superstitions, something crazy with I mean, I don't walk under a fucking ladder, but That's again, that's just common sense. You don't fucking walk under ladders. Shout out to my mom though. she's obviously a superstition person. I she's the one that taught me about the umbrellas, the ladders, all the crazy the mirrors and everything like that. But this woman will stop dead in the middle of the road if a black cat crosses it. Yeah. And then turn around and go a different route so she doesn't have to cross that pack black cat path. Now that's it's that's not even the thing. It crossed your path. Yeah. No. No. The whole thing is based on if if a black cat crosses your path. So it doesn't matter if you turn around. It's not about their path. It's about your path. Well because crows have always been unlucky too, right? Crows have always signified death and they're also black. An omen. They're an omen. Yeah, they're an omen, right? So I wonder if there's some correlation to that. But you know what? Looking at this, yes I do have some I guess I do have some superstitions. I I touch glass going over railroad tracks. do you you're one of those O C D fucking weirdos? fuck yeah. Yeah. We'll be going we'll be in the car and be like, glass Everybody touch fucking glass. I I guess I knock on wood. So I mean I think everybody knocks on wood. At this point it might be more just a funny thing to do as opposed to it. Yeah. Kind of one of those easily recognizable ones. But I'm just saying if you like, hey, we can't go that way, there's a black cat, I'd be like, What has shit to do today, man? Yeah, I'm I'm run the fucker over. But look at like all the witchcraft stuff too. You know what I mean? Like obviously that's pretty associated with it. So that could probably I mean, Salem witch trials happened, or at least history wants us to believe it. Yeah. But it's all a farce. It's all it's all made up, but but it's funny though, like what the the cat's reputation depends on which country you're in. Like we can't just decide one fucking thing. You know what I Yeah, yeah. They're like, no, those tabby cats, those orange white fuckers, bad luck. You you you you touch one of those, your grandma dies. Well, I also like that is the top cat that I don't like is an orange cat. So so you know You so you just fucking Garfield turned on the cartoons for you and you're like, No I mean I'll watch that. I can't he doesn't He doesn't live in my house. And Bill Murray can do no fucking wrong. Walking under a ladder, I mean, you could say it's a superstitious thing. It's just a dumb idea. Well, that that's what I that's what I mean. Like it it's just common sense. Don't fucking walk under a ladder. Yeah. At all. Don't do that. There's no point in that. I think that's I think that's ridiculous. No. Why why would you even think I mean, because if s especially if somebody's on it, you know? If you're like thirteen and your dad's up on a ladder, don't walk under the fucking ladder. Yeah. One, he's gonna yell at you anyway. Yeah. Two, anything could fall. Yeah. Right. Anything could fall at any point. He's up there with a drill, hammer. Now he's distracted looking at your ass because you walked over the ladder he's yelling at you about it because he thinks it's unlucky and he falls off the ladder somehow. It's your fault. And it's like the the matrix, Like, would you have knocked over the pot if I didn't say anything? Probably. Like, would dad have fallen off the ladder if you didn't walk under it? Yeah. he definitely would. It actually kind of r reminds me of my my grandfather's dying words. Quit shaking the ladder, you little shit. What about umbrellas? you can't. I'll open the motherfucker right now, dude. you're you're inside. It's raining outside. I gotta go walk into the rain and get rained on. Yep. Just to protect your superstition. Open the fucking umbrella outside after you've already gotten And how the fuck I mean, I don't know if y'all had kids at all, but I mean, like, you couldn't like a kid got an umbrella in their hand, they're like, We're gonna play fucking poppin'. Like you're how do we how do we how many parents are just sitting there hollering at their kids for opening the umbrellas every single one of them. Every single well, all parents our parents' age, right? So like the previous generation. But also how old can this umbrella superstition be? I cannot assume we had fucking pop out umbrellas in eighteen hundred. I've no idea. Like how old is a fucking umbrella superstition so they're all of a sudden like no you can't do that. Umbrellas were first invented four thousand years ago in a s ancient civilization, Mesopotamia, Egypt, and China originally as sunshade or parasols for royalty. eighteen fifty two is when they started using modern steel ribs and that kind of thing. So I would assume around the same time period is when they started becoming foldable and it's gotta be fucking funny though. Somebody had to do something like opened up an umbrella and spilt drinks and caused a massacre in a place by accident. everybody slipped and died and everybody gonoria. Because he didn't he didn't close it before he came in. he he he came in and then he closed it and then like all the water that was on top of the umbrella Caused there'd be a slippery patch in the front of the saloon right there. So when Jim Bob Joe fucking outlaw come in, he had his gun in his hand already. He fucking came through the door flying, already had the gun in the hand, slipped, it fucking went off and shot one of the hookers upstairs. Whole place lit on fire. Whole place lit on fire. That was a scene in Red Dead too, I'm pretty sure actually. What about this? What about like whenever they invented the umbrellas that you pushed a button and they opened up? They to go show his friends, dude, look what I just made. We're gonna be millionaires. And he hits it and fucking hits him right in the nose and dies. Yeah. And he's like, it's a bad luck. You can't do that anymore. Yeah. I gotta tell you though, this whole skit of somebody figuring out the pop-up umbrella and it might kill on their friend, that could be fucking hilarious. I'm not great at CGI, so we'll to wait. Thirteen fucking years from now? Yeah. So we get our TV show. No, we got skits. We're ready. Don't worry. Yeah. A lot of them. Do you ni you need riders? Mm mm. Mm mm. I just need I just need 17 people that don't argue. You guys have seen Key and Peel? Get ready for Larson and Barlow. I'm pretty sure knocking on wood is probably the most common one I've ever heard of. It's metal, isn't Do you do the fucking throw the salt over the shoulder? There's no and you spill salt. I I've I've got You have to throw it over your fucking right hand, throw it over your right shoulder, whatever it is, All I think about is fucking dumb and dumber. He's like, you spilled salt paddle, you gotta throw it on shoulder. He chucks a whole fucking salt shaker. Yeah. It's bubble in the back of your head. People come up with some crazy shit though. Absolutely. I think it's just an excuse for whenever bad things happen, they can blame it on something because nobody has any fucking self-accountability. no, everybody didn't die. Your family didn't die because you spilt the salt shaker. Your family died because you had four beers at lunch. And he's all like, well, no, that family that died in the car crash, definitely he spilt salt on the table. I seen it. He didn't throw it over his shoulder, and then they all crash. Like, or maybe 17 whiskeys at lunch is not a good idea to go drive with your family on. There's no accountability. that's really bad idea, just so you're aware. They just gotta blame it on something, Any of these even Friday the thirteenth, is there any actual convincing arguments that it's bad? we said there's no actual hotels that have had any problems, so I've never broken a mirror. I've never walked under a ladder. You're all thinking back to it. I mean, I've never had a cat walk in front of me like that. I've had plenty of cats walk in front of me, never a black cat. But how the fuck did you get so unlucky? How is that unlucky? Because I've never done any of those things. Because you're still alive. Because it's fucking common sense. Just don't do it. Just don't do it. Cats suck anyway. The cat one doesn't really fucking bother me, to be honest with you. It really doesn't fucking bother me. I don't think it should bother anybody because as many fucking stray cats are in America It shouldn't fucking bother you. There's bound to be a black cat somewhere. The truth of the matter is, bro, Friday the thirteenth is just another day. You'll just remember it being more bad because you were taught it was more bad. And I'm one hundred percent sure that the movies hype that up quite a bit. Yeah. But you you've had plenty of fucking April twenty-seventh terrible fucking days too. And you're just like, Yeah, but that was just a normal day. But whenever you get a flat tire on Friday the thirteenth, I had a really bad, really bad March 14th, 2023, just saying Shout out, Dad. R I P dad. You know, it's funny, I had a friend back in the day, Sam, and his dad died on Friday the thirteenth. Really? And he always said that's his only superstition now. And I'm like Didn't fucking throw the salt. I I think it's because he didn't throw the salt over the shoulder, you know. So I think to wrap that up though, to despite hundreds of years of superstition, there's still no scientific proof that the date itself had anything more dangerous than any other day. I bad luck's bad luck. You you're either gonna fucking die a car crash or you're not. Well play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Absolutely. Like if you drive eighty five miles an hour down the freeway every single day of your life, but you get caught on Friday the thirteenth, It could have happened Saturday the fourteenth, and you could still be the same asshole going eighty five miles an hour. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Well, anyway, since this Episode is coming out on Friday the thirteenth. If anything goes wrong, gonna start blaming it on Friday the thirteenth. We know we're gonna blame it on you. okay. That's fine. I shouldn't have mentioned it. Knock on wood. no, I knocked on wood. We're safe now. That's the rules. All right. So great topic, right? But before we get back into the absolute nonsense, that is, what you've come to expect from Still Fat Podcast. we gotta shout out some love to our awesome sponsor, Dubby Energy. Look, we're not getting any younger, right? Never. Between work, family recording this podcast, trying to function like responsible adults, sometimes we need a little extra fuel in the tank, That's where W energy comes in. A great tasting energy drink mix designed to help you stay focused and energized, whether you're gaming, grinding through the work day, or just trying to keep up with life's daily chaos. And because you're part of the Still Fat family, you can get 10% off your order at W.gg using the promo code StillFat at checkout. Remember with W Energy, lock in, stay sharp, dominate your day. Big thanks to W Energy and keeping up the energy for Still Fat Podcast. Let's get back to the nonsense. All right, man. So one of my new favorite things to talk about is using my the assholes, buddies. We already declared at the beginning of this episode you are an asshole. I'm thoroughly enjoying it. One, because it's just great to know not just the people stupid when it comes to superstitions. They're just pretty stupid in fucking general. Just in fucking general, dude. So this one. I like our very first episode when we talked about this. It was the was it the sister that out of the other sister about how many dudes she slept with. Yeah, and the or the virgin boy brother, yeah. That was that was a really good one. I I really like that one. All right. So I got an interesting one here. I like I gotta tell ya, it's it's kinda funny. Because I feel like this type of stuff happens a lot. And again to talk about how stupid people can be. So it's Am I the asshole for not telling a man that the research he was mansplaining to me was wrote by me? So check it out. I'm a thirty three year old lawyer and researcher. I work in a super niche, small, male-dominated subfield in law. Yesterday I was out with some friends and I met a guy who works in the exact same field. I was super excited to talk shop, but when we got to the point of disagreement, he looks at me and says my opinion was based on nothing. While he was backed up by an actual professional, the professional he cited was me. He literally started quoting my paper to me completely wrong. Explaining it like I was a first year student when I gently asked if he was sure that's what the author meant, author meant, he scoffed and goes, It's actually pretty simple if you could just understand it. fuck. So I just sat back and let him dig his own grave. I'd imagine this guy's going off for a while, talking about how obviously she doesn't understand how it works, Well, that's how mansplaining works, right? At the end of the night, I was putting my jacket on. I look him dead in the eye and I say, By the way, I'm the one who wrote that paper, and you completely misunderstood Then I walked out. He lost his mind, screaming that I trapped him just to humiliate him, which would never hold up in court, by the way. You let people talk. Remember, shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. Now the friends, because he's like a friend group thing, you know what I mean? The friend is saying I should have been nicer, should have warned him, should have stopped him. But honestly, am I the asshole for letting him dig his own grave? No. No, honestly, I think more people should let other people dig their own grave. Because but at the same time, when you first had brought it up, I was like, Well, as long as he's like not getting it fucking wrong, if he's taking your article that you made and and actually spitting facts about it, then I think he'd be in the clear. But obviously he's kind of a tard and got it wrong to the person that fucking wrote it. Do you have some moral fucking obligation to be like, Hold on, buddy? I wrote that paper. chances are it's like, no, you fucking didn't. You know what I mean? Now you just gotta explain for the next twenty minutes how you wrote the fucking paper and show the drafts and be Yeah, pretty sure it was me. I mean I busts out laptop. I don't think so, man. If anybody like Again, what I do for a living, you get a lot of people that come and be like, I know how to do this better than you do. really? Sure. I do this every single day of my life. I I know all the bank rules, I know how I know how the world works, I know math, I know how everything works. No, no, no, Just do it this way. This way. No, no. I could go here and do it. No, no, you can't. No, you can't. No. It's like it's like going into a a shop. Like imagine going, you're you're a fucking mechanic, right? Somebody rolls up and be like, man, Cadillac converter is definitely out. you you've got a really good point, Mr. You shut the fuck up. You shut the fuck up. And if it's if it's just something simple, it's a loose bolt. Yep. You know what I mean? You just say, all right. Nine times out of ten. I'll replace your fucking whole Catalytic converter for you to pay your four thousand dollars as you just Done. Problem solved. I I don't think it makes sense. No, that's that's a real thing, actually. If you want to look it up on YouTube, it's called customer states. Yep. could could be a great topic. Just just saying. Well see the hard part with the customer states is they're great because they're like customer states the the brakes aren't working and they pull off the tire and the rotor just falls off. Yeah. Yeah. Customer states there's a really bad noise and he goes to the back of the car and the tires flat and fucking wheels broke in half and shit. Like, yeah, you fucking bet. You fucking bet. yeah, I deal with that shit all the time. Because when we sell a car and they'll come back and be like, hey, the air conditioner's not working. Yeah. Did you turn it to cold, dumbass? Did you push the AC button? There's an AC button? Stupid as Did you push the research button? Did you roll the fucking windows down to let the hot air out? The last one I can remember the most was a guy that came in and said that his remote start doesn't work. Okay. Elaborate a little more. Because I've seen this. You have remote start, right? Right. Now remote start has rules. Right. you have to have over a certain amount of gas. All your doors have to be closed. You have to lock it first and everything like that. And the car has to be a certain temperature for it to run long enough. Yeah. All types of certain rules. You know what I mean? So the guy says, no, my remote start doesn't work. And I'm sitting out there, I'm like, sir, it it works. We'll go figure it out. And if it doesn't, we'll take care of it. No problem. You know what I mean? And so he sits there and he's like, my remote start does not work. Okay. No problem. Show me. Shelly. Opens the car door, sits in the passenger seat, hits the button for remote start to work. Swear to fucking god, dude. Swear to God. See, remote start doesn't work. People are fucking stupid. On the window sticker, it says push button start, right? Because on the dash, there's a button, you push to start with your foot on the brake. Right. And you have to fucking put your foot on the brake. You thought well I was pushing the button. Yeah, no. buddy, this is the hard part 'cause you gotta keep a straight face too. You know what I mean? You're just No no No no No no Listen, I I was a mechanic for a long time. I've never once kept a straight face. Never once kept a straight face and I've never had a customer complaint. Yeah, no, that's that's crazy. especially from the point of view of this story, with her writing the article and you being the expert, you know how the fucking remote start works. she's not the asshole. No. She's not the asshole because he wanted to come off as fucking arrogant, just like the dude with the remote start wanted to come off as arrogant, right? Yeah. So she's not the fucking asshole. I'm willing to bet none of these conversations started with, well, in my opinion. Or anything like that. It was this was as she said, mansplaining. Right. So he's probably like, let me tell you, bitch, yeah, men are better lawyers. Which what's something that's funny? As a man, I fucking hate mansplaining. Yeah. No. I think it's the dumbest thing. they're real people too. They kind of can figure things out just like you and me. They're real people. You gotta let them dig their grave. Yeah, absolutely. I don't even argue at this point if somebody says you need to go right or left and I know it's left. I go, fuck you. You need to go right here. Okay. Going right. I ain't got shit to do. Let's go to the right. Yeah. Yeah. I don't care. I don't argue with no. Even if I have shit to do. Late before I'll be late again. You want to go right? I'm not arguing no more. I was always taught if you're already late for work, there's no sense in speeding. Yeah. Stop and get some McDonald's. Stop getting some. Fuck yeah. Yeah, no, I'm I'm a very big proponent of it life's not worth arguing about. You know me, bro. Like you're I'm mad about this, okay. Be mad. Whatever. Okay, you're you're wrong. Okay, I'm wrong. Okay. Don't care. And like I said, for me, that's how I would take that. I'm not the asshole. Now Was she a little snighty to be like, by the way, I wrote that paper? I don't think she even needed to do that. it was too embarrassed him, but he did that to himself. You know what I mean? But at the same time, she goes home knowing he's dumb. Yeah. That does not affect her life at all. That guy thinks he won. Let him think he won. Fuck yeah. And then hope to God one day he's looking up that paper again, sees the act sees the lady that wrote it, goes, Motherfucker. I met this bitch in the mall. She's friends with my friends and I and he's gonna eat those words for fucking yeah but yeah no and by the way I think in that aspect, yeah, she didn't really need to she wasn't the asshole for it, but no yeah, she could have probably had a little more fun with it. Yeah. Cause I'd have hey, I really like that paper you were talking about. I think you had a really all good. Can you tell me who the Arthur was? Yeah. We are assholes. Cause every time we read one of these, we're like, no. We can asshole this up. That was soft. Yeah. So we're we're No, we are definitely assholes. We are definitely deciding she is not the asshole there and she could have gone worse like most of Yeah. Absolutely. I have a bit of a long one. So am I the asshole for telling my daughter she can't attend her ex friend's funeral. Ooh. So this am I the asshole comes from a mother who's wondering if she went too far by telling her daughter she has absolutely no business attending her former best friend's funeral, right? So the backstory. Her daughter had a childhood best friend named Kelly. These two were inseparable, right? Throughout school, college, the whole thing. were so tight that her daughter was even a bridesmaid at Kelly's wedding, So during the daughter's childhood, mother had gone through a nasty divorce, cheating husband, right? Daughter fucking hates cheating, Writes the dad off, that whole thing, right? So I mean it it left enough of a mark. Fast forward to about seven years ago. daughter spots Kelly having dinner with another man at a fancy restaurant and immediately assumes the worst, she's fucking cheating. and so instead of asking questions or finding out what's actually going on, she just goes nuclear, starts posting shit on Facebook and all socials, Just thrashing Kelly. Not even getting to the bottom of Now they live in a really religious part of the country, right? Bible belt, okay. Probably the Bible Belt, right? So these accusations have some serious consequences, Kelly becomes ostracized from her from her community, people turn against her, and then her marriage eventually falls apart. So here's the kicker. The guy at the restaurant that Kelly was sitting there with, was a relative. So Kelly wasn't cheating at all. By the time the truth came out, the damage was already done and her reputation was ruined. So nothing really could do there. So Kelly blocks the daughter. They're not friends anymore. They're not friends anymore. This was posted yesterday. okay. Nice. So fast forward to like yesterday, Kelly has tragically passed away. Probably on Friday the thirteenth. Probably on Friday the thirteenth. No. the daughter finds out through Facebook that her former best friend is. Died and she decides she's gonna go to the funeral, which is two fucking states away. first of all, not friends. She didn't even fucking like you anymore. You ruined her fucking life. But the daughter argues that she has every right to mourn someone who was once her best friend, right? And that's when the mom drops the bomb. Hey, you have no rights to to be there. The family doesn't want you there. So am I the asshole for telling my daughter she has no right to attend the funeral of a best friend whose life she so the interesting part was at first, whenever you said, Am the asshole for not letting my daughter attend? or that's how I perceived it. Right. So I'm like, Well, yeah, I mean, obviously she's your daughter underage, I'd assume, because you're giving her a grown ass woman. Yeah. no, I don't think she's the asshole for calling her out on it at all. I it's not her business. The mom can be mad all she wants to. I can't wait. She should have been more of an asshole. She should been more of an asshole. She should have been like, Yeah, you should go. And you should go apologize to her husband and her mom and blah blah blah. And you should just get up there and be like, hey, I fucked up and ruined this lady's life. Yeah. But it's hard too, because we're talking about them being very religious. Well, even so, I I left that part out because I just didn't want it to go so long. But so even the mom of Kelly has talked to the mom of the daughter who destroyed her. They were obviously friends, yeah. They were obviously friends too. And the mom of Kelly was like, No, fuck that bitch. Fucking hate her. Don't ever fucking talk to me again. but hey, if your kid fucked my day up, I probably wouldn't want to talk to your kid. I'll tell you this much, like she has a right to ask for forgiveness. You know what I Like that's what it is. If it comes down to it, maybe she should have done it when she was alive, maybe she didn't. I don't know. Maybe she attempted to, I don't know. Yeah. But it's not fair to make the other family suffer through that and have you be the bad guy there. Yeah. there's a lot of stories like that. And we don't know how Kelly died. Yeah. Did she did she die because the the ruining of her life led her in a downward spot of drugs? Well God only knows. You know what I And it very well could be. Who knows? but but it's irrelevant though. no, the mom's One hundred percent right for doing it. And again, she could have taken another level, what'd she say? Am I the asshole for telling her she shouldn't attend? Yeah, am I the asshole for telling my daughter she has no right to attend the funeral of a best friend whose life she ruined? Not even not even a right. You don't have a right at all. You are owed nothing and you do not go there. You should not even you should not even speak Kelly's name at that point. Yeah. I think I think you're such a piece of shit at that point. Well, yeah, she jumped a conclusion. She ruined somebody's life and And again, you didn't I didn't go to my best friend Corey and be like, hey, bro, the fuck was going on? Yeah. Yeah. So your childhood best friend, you know what I mean? hey, listen, if you are doing some dirt, just let me know so I'm not complacent. Yeah. Or don't, I don't care. no, that's my cousin. Okay, cool. it doesn't say who the other person was, it just says that they're a relative. It's irrelevant either way. That should yeah, it's irrelevant. Yeah. Even if even if I was out to dinner with another woman. My wife's conclusion isn't right away that I'm fucking cheating. Yeah, but whenever it's blasted enough on Facebook the fucking story becomes everything. You know what I mean? You can't have thirty people say something on the internet and not believe it anymore. You know, and chances are it's probably true. But not the asshole at all. And her daughter didn't deserve to go, and her daughter's the asshole of the story. Yeah. Just to be clear. And I hope she has guilt for the rest of her life on that. I fucking agree, actually. And good for the mom for standing up for the deceased, I mean I think she should be able to mourn Kelly but not at the funeral not to bring it in anybody else. Yeah. Absolutely. So mom's not an asshole. Yeah no no no no. Just like you said. Am I the asshole for telling a cashier their joke was dumb. Kinda. So yesterday I was shopping all day and I noticed I didn't have my debit card. I immediately began to panic because I needed to pay my rent. I retraced my steps until I finally found it. I asked the cashier if I left my card at the store. They said, Nope, we don't have it. I began to turn and walk out the store when the cashier said with a smile, Hey, I'm just kidding, man. We got it in the back. The joke annoyed me a little, so I left. I simply said, Okay, thank you. The cashier said, Hey man, I was only joking. And he said, I know. then she went back to giving the card and said, Hey, lighten up, sorry, didn't mean to offend you. the statement made me so angry, I replied, Listen, I know it's a joke, but it was a stupid joke that wasn't funny, I didn't laugh. You really need to try working on your customer service. The cashier looked at me red faced, stunned, and I walked out the store. Was I being an asshole or too aggressive? I mean, she's kind of being a little being a little too aggressive. I think in that situation, he's just trying to make light of things, you know, lost your fucking debit card, so But you found it. This is a win. Yeah. That's that's what I'm getting at is like you found it. You don't have to be a fucking asshole anymore. Yeah. You know, just because the joke of the cashier was wrong, like, yeah, it was wrong, but you could have at least went, Yeah. All right. Yeah, he he fucking got me. Thanks, thanks. Yeah, it's and and like why Well it when you first said it, I was like, Yeah, you're kind of an asshole, but you're kind of not. Like if a joke's dumb, I'm not gonna be like bad joke. To be clear, yeah. Yeah, rework that one. Take that one back, put a pen in it. We'll work on that joke later. But let's see where you're going with it. We gotta work on that one. But that's different whenever you're making a whole joke as opposed to a small little snide comment to joke around and lighten up the mood. And I think that's the big key here. They were just trying to lighten up the mood. The ha, just kidding. You know what I Like, it's not like they let him leave the store and then chased after them. You know what I mean? And this person could have deflected and been like, now that you're all in a bad mood about it, and why ruin somebody else's day because you're having a That's what I think they were trying to do. Right. You know what I mean? And all it's just it's just manners. I I think everybody's had that day where it's just not going their way and nothing goes right. So you know what? Fuck everybody else. and that really sucks because it always ends up somebody else's fault. Always, you're still an asshole because you took it out on somebody. I've done it. I've done it this fucking week. I I think everybody is guilty of that. Well, see, I'm the more the opposite way. I'm more of the I make the joke in the bad situations that I shouldn't. I am too. Yeah. But so therefore, you know me, I don't believe in being a hypocrite. So if somebody makes a joke when I'm not in the mood to joke, I do not take it out on them because I know I've been that guy a hundred times. Yeah. And I don't want to make somebody feel bad for trying to help. You know what I mean? And again, I think a lot of this has to do with intent. this person wasn't trying to make your day worse. They were trying to lighten the mood. Yeah. And and the fact is you said something like, You literally need to work on your customer service. Go fuck yourself, dude. I'm not the dumbass adult who left my debit card here. put it back in your wallet. What's wrong with you? This isn't my fault, For all we know, that cashier may be the person that actually turned it in, Yeah. Maybe that cashier was the person that seen it on the ground, picked it up. Well, did he go right back to the person that checked him out? I don't know. They said it had to retrace the steps, so I'm not sure. Could have been a day. Doesn't matter though. Point is you had a bad day, they didn't. Why take it out on Yeah. Why ruin their day? Why fuck with Why d why challenge their customer service? Why challenge their fucking worth echo? You know what I mean? This is the people that go on Yelp and be like, one star, they made a joke and I didn't laugh at it. That's your fucking fault, dude. Why are you trying to ruin somebody else's ass day? I don't know. Yeah, like you said, and I I sympathize with it, one, because I'm that person. We're that person, as we said, you know what I mean? So I do my best not to say, that's not fucking funny. I don't need that shit right now. I'll do everything in my power to go. Good one, you Well and I brought up, I'm I do that, but I'm also the type that dude, if I've had a bad day, don't do that to me. It and it's and it's has nothing to do with me not trying to be a hypocrite or anything. It's just like nothing can make my day better at that point. if it's already gone that bad, the only thing that's gonna make it better, boobs. You know? But at the same time, I'm human. I'm human. That's and that's the simple facts of it. You can't get past that because everybody's fucking human. Yeah. We all make mistakes. I make mistakes every day. Yeah, and but you probably do your best not to take it out of the I try not to. I try my best. Well, I'm blessed in the way that it doesn't affect me the same way. my attitude towards other is usually not affected directly on my mood, but also because I'm in fucking customer service too. Yeah. You know what I mean? I literally do sales for a living and and no matter what, it doesn't matter how Shitty, your girlfriend's cheating on your at home, your cat just died, blah, blah, blah. You got to go in there, talk to everybody. Hey, welcome in today. How you doing? You know what I mean? Glad to see you. And then they're like, How are you? And you're like, my cat died, but fine, you know what I mean? Like that's just the way it is. but I mean, I used to be a very angry man, you know. But now it's I'm working on it. Yeah. Now it's to the point where, like, I'm having a bad day, you're having a great day. I'm just happy you're having a great day. You know what I mean? Like, it ain't gonna rub off on me. But nonetheless, I'll try. Well, last night when we were streaming, I was we were playing Warzone and I just we just kept getting fucked up every fucking turn, right? And there comes a point when you're you're just you're just not having fun anymore. Yeah. You're just you're getting fucked up every single round. That's not fun. And then it's not fun for people watching you because you're just getting irritated, So that's when I have to shut it off. Because I don't want to let it dictate the rest of my day. Yeah. Even if it's at the end of the day. It's the power of your mind, man. You can control that. You know what I mean? You could be saying, bro, we've lost 17 matches in a row, but I'm having a great time. But I also don't get irritated with menial shit. don't sweat the small stuff. I try not to. Life's not worth it. The whole there's no use crying over spilt milk, you know what I mean? it's Yeah, no, that is that's that should be everybody's life motto. Yeah. you should definitely cry over melted butter if it's the last fucking ounce of butter and you're about to make toast. But what if it was chocolate? The last of the old. There's always gonna be a what if. There's always gonna be a what if. Yeah. But but if it is the last of the chocolate milk on the planet, go find a cocoa beaten, dumbass. Yeah. And again, I think like I said, I think it's definitely kind of an asshole. Definitely just because you took it out on somebody that did not deserve it. You know what I mean? They don't they don't give a shit. They got their own life. Like you don't know. That lady's mom might have died that day on Friday the thirteenth. Yeah. And and n she's having a bad day. So she makes a joke to try to lighten up her own mood. Yeah and you gotta fuck with her about it or fuck with him about it. There's nothing about that. Well, I mean this podcast is kind of the representation of how we deal with our trauma, right? We we joke about it. Mm-hmm. Not everybody's the same way. No. But no, definitely the asshole for, you know, taking it out on somebody that didn't fucking deserve. So stop being an asshole soup, five, four, four, six, one. All right. And before we dive back into chaos, I want to give a shout out to another awesome sponsor of Still Fat. That's Mellow Productions. got a wedding coming up, birthday corporate event, or just want to try to throw one hell of a party? Mellow Productions has got you covered. From professional DJ and MC services to PA system rentals, Mellow Productions brings the music, the sound, the energy to make your next event one to remember. Rather you need somebody to keep the dance floor packed, a microphone to keep the crowd entertained, or just a quality sound system for your event. Big celebrations, small functions, and everything in between. Mellow Production can help bring your event to life. So whenever you're planning your latest gathering, remember, refresh your next event with a slice of mellow. A huge shout out to Mellow Productions for supporting Still Fat. Now let's get back to the nonsense. So obviously, I talked to some of my friends about watching the podcast and everything like that. And then and again, you know, really like the YouTube clips and again a lot of hits on but like Couple of my friends are sitting there telling me buddy, I can't watch your podcast or listen to your podcast, anything in my car, cause you guys say fuck too much I'm like, first of all, it's not changing, you know what I mean? And and it's funny 'cause this is what actually made me think about it. One of my good friends was like, I tried to watch it at home and in the first seven seconds there was seven fucks. And I'm like, Well yeah, dude, our our podcast is not rated PG thirteen. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's Sonny, it's like NC17, at best, you know. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's not that bad. We aren't showing out our titties yet. You know what I mean? Give us time. No, that's that's unrated. That's the unrated. That's the Patreon version. That's the Patreon. We gotta do that one. So it actually got me thinking about one of my favorite things, which is PG 13 movies, as you know. they are allowed to have one fuck in them. There's a couple of them that got a couple fucks. But PG thirteen movies are allowed to have one fuck and still get the rating of PG thirteen. especially if it's not like a sexual related one, like you can't say, I'm gonna go fuck that dude. Yeah. Yeah, you get in trouble for that. You know what I Makes me wanna fuck a dude. I'm sure you could probably think of some, But like it they are fucking beautiful, you know, like they are needed. And for me, my favorite one of all time the ringer movie with Johnny Knoxville. Yeah. And he's all like, well, we stopped at the mall to get ice cream. The kid pops it. When the fuck did we get ice cream? And you see Johnny Knoxville's fucking face just go like, my God. You know what I Because that's just not scripted. You can do it, dude. Or there were another one. Fucking fantastic, dude, the Ron Burgundy. Yeah. Go fuck yourself, San Diego. Yep. Another one, you know, we were just talking about it earlier because we were doing the I like to do Cha cha. The one in Bruce Almighty. Whatever back to you, fuckers. Yeah what I mean? Like it's just they step it up a lot. How about how about you know actually I don't know this answer. Are you a big Adam Sandler fan? I am a huge Adam Sandler fan of Jim Carrey and Adam Sandler are like neck and neck, top of the list for me. They're up there, they're up there. So one of my favorite Scenes from Waterboy, which I fucking love Waterboy. Waterboy was one of my first DVDs I ever owned. That and little Nikki. And I watched both of them a lot. Like a lot. And whenever it's like, you can do it. Cut his fucking head off. You know what I mean? And then naturally. I like Vicky Valencourt. She showed me her boobies and I like them poop. what's for dessert? Squirrel. It's so it's Kathy Bates in that, right? Yes, yeah. I fucking love her as the mom in that. She's so good. She's great. That girl is the devil. Foosball's the devil. I'm glad we're talking about harderboard now. My other favorite scene is whenever he throws the baseball and it goes out the window and it hits Professor or Art K. That sound plays in my head and makes me laugh. Like that's one of those, if I'm having a bad day, I picture that and I just Yeah. All right. But also kind of cool because we were just talking about rest in peace, Sir Patrick Stewart last week. Yep. It's not Sir Patrick Stewart, but it's X-Men. first class, McAvoy and you know the other guy they're going to recruit people and they walk in there to Wolverine and they say, suck, and he goes, go fuck yourself. And that was one of the first fuck you's in that like in that type of movie. You know what I mean? Because they are kind of aimed towards kids. Yeah. But it's like the first ones were aimed towards kids. Now that's Twenty, ten years later, we're growing up a little more. the that first X-Men, the original movie with with Hugh Jackman Hugh Jackman and and Sir Patrick Stewart. So that movie, if you're a kid, it could kinda come off as a little spooky because it's it's it seems dark at the beginning when you know he's he's through the ice and and snow and stuff and saber tooth's off in the trees and shit. comes off as a little spooky to me. The movie starts with the fucking Holocaust. No, yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. That's a that's a great point because because if it's aimed towards kids, why you know what I mean though? Like And then now my new favorite one is the new Guardians of the Galaxy Volume Three. Yeah. And it's it's so unlocked the fucking door. It's it's so fucking relevant because you've been there trying to get into a car and you're like, put stop pushing the I'm gonna I'm gonna push what what's What do I do now? Open the fucking door. Remember one of the scary movies, whatever like the aliens are taking over, they're making fun of War of the Worlds, you know. And then he tries to get into the car and he's like pulling the handle and he's like, you what? Fuck it. I'll die. I'll just stay here. Actually, it's funny you brought that up. I love the the one and I don't remember anything else from the movie except for we pee from our fingers. Signs no one's the signs on it. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have any of the fucks in the movies you can think of off top of your head? I do. The Batman. Not the one with Christian Bale. One with Edward. Okay. The recent one. His name's not fucking Robert Pattinson, by the It's Edward. It's Edward. They get away with Happy Fucking Halloween. Do they? yeah. Yeah, that's really it. Like that movie isn't funny like the other movies we were talking about, but they got away with happy fucking Halloween, you know. Beetlejuice. what's funny is I almost included the Beetlejuice one. I almost did. Hope you like Italian. where you go? nice fucking model. Talking about the thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's funny that you brought that up about how your friend couldn't listen to it in the car. other day we were in Medford and was like, We're done with what we're doing. go get some Chick-fil-A. but on the ride to Medford and our travels around town, we were listening to the last episode. And so I'm thinking to myself, this is pretty raunchy. I probably roll the windows. I'm not gonna fuck them. but also These are the same people that listen to wet ass pussy. Yeah, yeah. Go fuck yourselves. Yeah, absolutely. You can't get stuck up about it now. but so right, so we pull up to the drive-thru at Chick-fil-A and my wife stops the podcast and I'm like, Why did you do that? She's like, Because It says like fuck is every other word. it's really not that bad, actually. This segment this part This is about the word fuck, yeah. I was like, Yeah, no, we can't get fat lawed. I was like, No, that's great. That's what we should call it. So it's actually a takeaway from another podcast that we listened to. called Time Suck, and they call it Cummins Law, because the guy who does that is named Dan Cummins, but he talks about some off the wall shit, right? Like fucking your uncle in the backseat of a Two thousand three Grand National. You know, that's not even a real car, but you know, so shit like that, right? And so you get Cummins Laud and so now we have Fat Laud. Fat Laud, I like it. All right, that's what's up. Yeah. I'm still not gonna edit it myself, so I mean No, why would why should we censor ourselves? If you if you clicked on this podcast, it says explicit. the expendables three was a PG thirteen rating, and they got away with using the F word twice. By Harrison Ford and Mel Gibson. Harrison Ford says to Sylvester Stallone, you fuck up and I'm wearing it. Mel Gibson to Sly. Well, I fucking made the big time. So they got away with it twice. I think Mel Gibson should be able to say anything they want to. I mean and Harrison Ford, Mel Gibson, Sylvester Stallone, you can't really I understand him. So he probably cursed the whole time. Yeah. so there's a movie I really like, John Travolta's in it, called Be Cool. It's a sequel to get shorty. And it's it's just it's a pretty cool, like kind of weird, funny movie, but it's really it's really good. so like the reason why I learned that rule was he says he's talking about he's the first movie get shorty's about him getting in the movie business, the second movie's about him getting in the music business. And he's talking to one of his producer friends. He's dude, I'm tired of the movie business. There's too many rules. There's too much shit to deal with. like, Did you know in order to keep the PG 13 rating, you can only say fuck once? And he's all like, he's You know what I say? Fuck that. Which is great because he just challenged the people to rate the movie R and they still rated it PG 13, which I think is just a good fuck you to the absolute critics who rate that one. You know, you can think of some great ones, right? Like I said, obviously I mentioned my favorite, which I'm assume a lot of those are gonna be your favorites too. Go fuck yourself, San Diego was great. the the Evan Almighty or Bruce Almighty one and everything. But this is actually one of my favorite things to do though. Hence why I brought this subject up is can you imagine PG thirteen movies where you would want to put the one fuck you were given? Like if I was writing it out? Yeah, or you got to you got to have to plan the fuck. You got to add one fuck to this movie. So pick, one movie of Pirates of the Caribbean. Okay, I've got it. Anyway, okay, where would you put the fuck in Pirates of the Caribbean? I think it's Dead Man's Chest where he's I got a jaw duh. Yeah. Right. But they're on that big wheel. yeah, right. The the water wheel. And so like when he falls out of it, I think that would be a perfectly placed fuck fuck. I think that'd be great for that one. that immediately came to my head. I think that would make the scene just way better. one of my favorite parts that I think about it is it's the guy that's got the fake eye and his buddy, you know? Yeah in every fucking movie. Yeah. And just the back of his head. whenever they're stealing the ship, their pirate ship is all like, You bloody pirates So much better, you fucking pirates! Yeah. I just shut myself laughing, man. Especially if you can get away with like, I mean, obviously it's one it's one F word per PG thirteen, so you gotta scream it. You gotta you gotta make it worth it. Like when the fuck do we get ice cream? It's gotta count, you know what I mean? but I still I still kind of think with with that specific movie that I brought up is is like when he falls out of the the wheel. Ugh fuck. You know? Just because it's such a defining moment because there's no words there, Johnny Depp is all fuck. You know, because there's even a part in the blooper reel where he's talking to it's not James Norrington. I think it's the other dude that nobody likes because he's short and has curly hair. Fuck him. Orlando Bloom? No, no. No, he's one of the the guys with the East India Trading Company. yeah, fuck that dude. Yeah. I don't remember his name because I hate him so much I forgot his name. Fuck that guy. Fuck. but he's the guy that took Norrington's place. But in the blooper reel, he's nope, you can't cuss in a in a Disney film, mate. that resonates with me because if anything, I think the F word should come from Johnny Depp in those movies, especially because of that blooper reel. Yeah. That's that could be a very good reason why. And Johnny Depp could do he could he could put a couple of folks. Did you see his new movie that's coming out? It's a Ebernezer Scrooge movie. yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it looks good. And I'm not I'm not a huge nut for Christmas movies, but I like anything Johnny Depp. I really do. He did great in the battle with him and fucking Christina Turd. Christina Turd? Yeah. I don't even want to get it. Amber Hurd. No, Amber. It's Christina Turd. Fuck that bitch. No, he did great in that. And and I think he he can do no wrong. Even Sweeney Todd of all things was awesome. Did you really? my God. man, it was just so dark and the chick who plays Beatrix the Strange. Funny you said that. Yeah. So my other movie I wanted to bring up for using the F bomb. Deathly Hollows Part Two. shit. I picked Deathly Hollows Part Two because it is the darkest of the Harry Potter movies by all far. I mean I cried a lot when when Dobby died, but whatever this is. Safe Space. R. I. P. Dobby. He's a free elf now. All right, where would you put it at in Deathly Hollows Part two? man. I'm assuming it's in there already. No, no, no. It's not. no. It does not say fuck in Deathly Hollows. There's no fucks in the Harry Potter movies. Like I said, you could pick a lot of Harry Potter movies. I pick that one. And if the in my humblest of opinion, I got it. Alrighty. I got it. in the end of Deathly Hollows Part One, she throws the knife and we don't know what happens. In the beginning of Deathly Hollows Part Two, we find out where the fucking knife went, right? Mm-hmm. So in Dobby just looks down and goes, fuck. Kinda kinda like, okay, so we need to put it in frozen, the part where Olaf is is walking and he's turned this way and he goes, I've been impaled. He needs to go, fuck. I've been impaled. So so kind of the same concept, but Dobby. Fuck. In his little Dobby verse. Yeah. No, that's great. I put it at where Snape gets attacked by the snake. Cause then you would do two. Yeah. A first hit, nothing. First second hit, nothing. Doesn't she strike him a couple of times? Yeah, don't, don't, don't. And then it goes like the outside of the window where you see it happening. Yeah. And you say, fuck. A muffled, a muffled fuck. Yeah. In a British accent. That's actually pretty good too. Or or that one part whenever Neville Logmotton is stepping up to stand up to Voldemort when they think Harry's dead. He just, Fuck you, Voldemort. A couple of seconds later, when Harry wakes up, Voldemort just goes. Fuck it should come from Voldemort 'cause he's the most assuming. He's just defeated the shit. but so Ron's mom, she's like, not my daughter, you bitch. Yeah, you bitch. Right. Fucking bitch. Yeah, she should have said, Not my fucking daughter, you bitch. Perfect. Right there. But no, I vote right when Harry wakes up, like cuts to Voldemort for a split second and he goes fuck shit. I can't fucking win with this guy. I've been trying to kill him for eight fucking movies. well, obviously we have like Pirates of Curity and a lot of comedy, Harry Potter, a little bit of comedy. But I thought it'd be funny for a serious movie, which one of the more serious movies I thought of was A Pursuit of Happiness with Will Smith. The one where he's I've seen it, but I don't know that many scenes from it off the top of my head. I've definitely seen it though. the one about the becoming a bro Yeah, yeah, no, I've I've seen the movie. Yeah, I've seen whole thing. He he opens up the door when the cops knock and he gets arrested right before his interview. Yeah. And everybody shows he's like, What would you say if a guy showed up at a shirt? Hopefully he had really nice pants, you know, he's rushing to get over there. I just want the guy to open up the door and go, Fuck. I think I think we're we're thinking too small with this though. No, I stand corrected. I we gotta we might have to delete that part or keep it in there as a fuck up. There is a fuck in the pursuit in the in the pursuit of happiness because he says the there's graffiti on the wall and they said they s and he's like or he's like, hey, you spelt happiness wrong. You spelt happiness. That's why the title is named happiness with a Y and not a I. And then the kid goes, Is fuck spelled right? He goes, Yep, that one's spelled right. damn it, I'm wrong. That's actually a pretty good spot for that. Because it came from a child. The other one that I thought we can talk about the whole series again too is Austin Powers, which I have recently watched all over the world. love I lo I need to watch him again. So obviously the Austin P totally worth it. I on a whim, I just decided let's watch two Austin Powers movies, then the next day I watched the third one. Never mad about it. I they actually said they're making a fourth one. Are they? Yes, yes. Mike Myers has confirmed it's coming. which I pray for. Now, the funny part is about Austin Powers is they obviously use a lot of fricks, right? Like Dr. Evil said frickin' all the time. It'd be too easy to attach a frick, you know, into a fucking But if you could think of any Austin Powers moments specifically. what's what's the is it his is it Dr. Evil's henchman the chick. the one with the really fucking weird voice. She's like Bringing a Laser. Yeah. Bring in a fucking laser Because like that would be the only fuck in the whole thing because

Technical Difficulties 02: he just gets done saying frickin' laser beams, you know what I mean? no, I think that that part would be gold because you know, like I said, he says frickin' the whole time. So I just think it's I think it's perfect. I'm more confetti. It's everywhere. It's a party. Shout out Milo. I was just about to say it. All right. So I think on the Austin Powers one, whenever they find out Mr. Bigglesworth lost all his hair and he's mad at the guy and he hits the button and he slides into the chair and he's like, I'm I'm I'm still I'm still alive, but I'm really hurt. And they come in and they shoot him. Yeah. He's like, you shot me. Should have gone, Fuck, you shot me. Or or the other guy that was one of the henchmen. it's the the Irish one, and he's all like, Yeah, they're always after me frosted lucky charms. Yeah. He's all like, are they magically delicious? That'd be good. They're always out to be fucking frosted charms. Fucking Irish accent. I've got it. When gold member goes, Look, my vinky, it's a key. Instead of that, he's like, Look, it's my fucking vinky. It's a fucking key. It's fucking key. So he gets away with it twice. I love gold. I think maxing out the like we can do it twice? Yeah. There is some there is some balls to that which I do enjoy too. But speaking of Star Wars So that's that's one of my favorite PG thirteen ones though that I think about is the re Revenge of the Sith, right? Okay. The the third installment one. That's actually one of my favorites on that on the all of them. yeah, that lightsaber scene with the legendary. Heartbreaking. Yeah. Heartbreaking. I mean well, because because I mean, like I don't know, I I emotionalize through movies and music and stuff, but when I see that scene, I see two brothers fighting and like you get attached to characters and movies, especially growing up with them as long as we did. And dude, when they're fighting like that. I think we will have to do a a episode dedicated to Star Wars. maybe on the May the fourth, much my birthday, by the way. Or or May episode. We're gonna have to do a May the fourth episode, May the Fourth Be With You episode. and we gotta dedicate a Star Wars 'cause there's so much we could talk about for so much, so much will be great time. so Where would you put your fuck in Revenge of the Sid? Right off the bat, just d just Immediately comes when he's sitting there with no fucking arms and legs. I fucking hate you. You know, and and he's clawing his way up. Or I fucking hate you. that would have been powerful. Or if you put it in into Obi Wan, because like he's the you mean you like you were saying earlier, like the villain is not Darth Vader. You know, well, no no, I'm saying like the the villain is is the obvious, you know. The villain is the obvious person to say fuck, yeah. Yeah. Lord Voldemort definitely needs to say it right after he fucking wakes up. But in this situation, you know, there's a lot of villains in this movie. There's a lot of good people in this movie. Obviously, Darth Vader's not one of but in that moment, Anakin is definitely a bad guy in that moment, right? So Misunderstood, but put it in the same area of the movie, but but give it to Obi Wan's. I got the fucking high ground, Anakin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Come at me, bro. It's fucking over. It's fucking over. Don't fucking do it. Yeah. Yeah. No, so like there's a lot of good spots for Obi-Wan to say it. Yeah, yeah. And it's funny too, because Obi-Wan does speak very properly. He's not a he's not a man of many emotions, obviously being a Jedi. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like not Anakin and Obi Wan's always a proper general person. no. The king has to do it. King? The king of fuck. No. Samuel Jackson. Samuel Jackson. When when he's about don't fucking listen to him, Anakin You know, like that part when when he about throws the emperor out, or he's like, No, no, no, do it. I I'm too weak. I'm too I'm too weak. Whatever he says, well this the the council agrees to add you as a member, but we do not grant you the rank of master. What? This is absurd. Because I fucking said so. Yeah. Yeah. I think for me no, dude, they need to put in from from an from another one of his movies. Like so, but like make it Star Wars. So I'm sick and tired of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane. So like take some of it out of it, but like I'm sick and tired of your fucking shit, Anakin. So I think one of my favorite parts that I have to add because it's it's it's fucking comedy, not because it would actually like add to the story, but it's just be fucking funny. Is whenever they're going into the Jedi Temple after Order Sixty Six is executed. Yeah. And Anakin goes to the room with all the younglings, right? And he's the youngling walks up to him, which is by the way, that is George Lucas's son. shit. Which I thought was pretty cool too. And he says, like Master Anakin attacking the temple, whatever he says, and he just hits the lightsaber. What should we do? And the kid just goes, Fuck That'd be great. then right at the end, whenever, you know, Darth Vader gets the full suit and everything like that, and he's all like Pat and they died, Mobund. He just goes, just F You know how they you know how they like give her like somewhat of a Viking funeral where they they like push her off the cliff when she's dead in the casket or not in the casket but like in the send her off the thing. Yeah, she like I wasn't fucking dead. Well if you didn't know, I mean there's a lot of Viking things related to because actually it's a lot like that's why they burn their people and stuff like that. Like that's again when we get to that Star Wars episode. Yeah. it's some pretty crazy shit how they do it. And it's Pure genius. But that would be fucking hilarious. Don't get me wrong. Fucking hilarious to do that. And even if Anakin was just like, we grant you, you know, on the council, but you can't be granted mastery. He just goes, What the fuck? Yeah. And you know the funny part coming from Anakin, who at this point he was still just a prima donna. He wasn't a psycho yet. Yeah. It just him being his normal dramatic. But why? actually so I I would imagine the other movies are also PG thirteen, right? All of them. Yeah. Yeah. So in the second one, when he murders all the sand people, yeah. It would be great when he's explaining to Padme. I murder the men, the women, even the fucking children. Yeah. yeah. That would go hard. That would go hard, yeah. And it's awesome too because like There's obviously a whole I don't know maybe I'm wrong, but there's a whole Star Wars lore, everything about it. They they have everything from languages to all this stuff, but well what we've seen in the in the movies isn't is nowhere close to any of the stories because George Lucas they when they wrote it, they wrote it fucking huge. They do not use a lot of derogatory terms though. Yeah. So that would be interesting. is there a Star Wars cussing handbook for profanity and slurs and stuff? Like because you're at one time it's like, Do want a death stick? You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Okay, so they call a cigarette a death stick. So they have to have some relation, but there's no cuss words, right? So there's gotta be sub relation to it where it's like you call somebody a scoffer. I just came up with the with another one. So you know the part in the end of the second one where was it Boba Fett gets his head chopped off? Yeah. And then the son, which is Django Fett, he's like, Dad, fuck I mean, it's all just timely placed. Fucking Let's be honest here too. If you make the kids say fuck. we were talking about pursuit of happiness, it's better. They can't not make it PG thirteen at that point. Well we kinda have to. It's fine. It's fine. He didn't know what he was doing. Yeah, I think I think this that we could probably have a segment on this every episode if we wanted to. Just going over Adam Sandler movies, Star Wars movies, just a whole series of where to add the fucks into. But I promise you, next time you're watching a PG thirty I know you don't pay attention to ratings, but next time you're watching a PG thirteen movie at the end of the I they're kind of obvious. Yeah. But I just don't pay. Next time you're watching a PG thirteen movie at the end of it, just imagine where you would say the fuck. Yeah. And I promise in two weeks you're gonna be like Yeah. It makes the movies better sometimes. Absolutely. I think that's I think that's what I'm gonna start doing, actually. You can you can add on to it. I mean, obviously you could go down the list, dude, all the Superman movies, all the Marvel movies, they added them in there now, you know what I mean. But side note real quick, were you a fan of the new Superman movie? The one that just came out? I haven't watched it yet. so it came out at the same time Fantastic Four did. Yeah, didn't it come out with the Jurassic Park movie too? Possibly. Yeah, with the new one. The new one. The Resurrection or whatever. So I went and seen Fantastic Four, which yeah, obviously as we talk about huge Marvel fans, so I was hyped about it. I wanna see that one actually. I'm I'm it's on Disney. Yeah. I haven't I just haven't got to it yet. It's good. so you definitely have to watch that for you watch Gyms Day. Yeah. we went and seen that and then like whenever we got out of that movie, so happens like fifteen minutes later, Superman was starting. And I don't I don't wanna go see a fucking D C movie anymore 'cause they fuck all up. You know, DC is not good at making movies. They're just fucking not. So Justin was with us, you know, the oldest, and It was like, well, you want to go Superman? He's like, yeah, I've heard it's pretty good. You I'm well, fucking, don't get your hopes up. It's not gonna be cooler than that Marvel movie. It's DC. How to fuck you? 15 minutes into the movie, I'm like, we should have watched this fucking movie first. It was fucking gold. I love the movie. I applaud it. And I have not said that about a DC movie, like a part of the DC universe. Not like the Batman one. That was good. I was gonna say that one wasn't really I'm talking about like Justice League, The Flash, and you know, all Batman versus Superman, all those fucking movies. They were not but this one came back and I was again excited about the movie. Supergirl came out, it was okay. if Superman got a, an eight point four out of ten, Supergirl got a five point five out of ten. But, compared to the three that Justice League was, that's pretty fucking good, I guess James Gunn, the guy who did those movies, he did Guardians of the Galaxy as well. Okay, he parted a ways with DC now. So they're scrapping the rest of the projects. We just watched the lantern show that just came out. They're just fucking scrapping everything all over again for the fifth fucking time, sixth time, who'd fucking knows. They already had Nathan Fillion in it, who also played the voice acting for actual Green Lantern. Yep. And it's like, dude, we what? No, you can't fuck this up. Scrapping fucking everything. I was super jacked about season two and a prequel they were talking doing. Yeah. Lanterns was dope. I was a big fan. It was very adult, you know what I mean? very grown up, which was cool. I'm down with that's what comic books are if you really know so Man of Tomorrow is gonna come out, which is the new super because that's already done. And then that they just fucking guess what? A great reset again. So yeah. But nothing, nothing makes sense with DC. They just they keep jumping hundreds of millions of dollars, trying shit. And like I said, I seen Superman, watched Lantern, Supergirl's okay. And I'm like, all right, who might get behind us? Who might get behind us? And then they're just fuck it all up again. And James Gunn said he wasn't even like bad blood. He was like, just fucking tired of it. So hopefully maybe they bring it back for Guardians. I don't know. Well I don't I don't know. DC be doing some crazy shit. Yeah. They're making another Batman movie. I like those Batman movies. Like I the Edwards. Yeah, they're dope. They're dope. I get behind those. But yeah, let's let's talk about crazy for a minute. Crazy. You go first this week. We were talking about Florida fiascos. Florida fiascos, here we are. So you are going first this week. I just want to touch on last week's episode. We know we didn't really elaborate that much on that case, but it it's the name of the fucking episode. If you didn't figure it out by then, I'm sorry. I don't have to fucking paint a picture for you people. Anyway, no, obviously five episodes in, which what is what is the fucking odds? Yeah. but so I went last week, I went first, and so now it's up to you to bring it home. Couldn't really go second because it was the same fucking one. It was. And it's all fun to be able to hop off. Confetti. I love the sparkle you throwing over there. Yeah, that's great. I'm surprised they're not still falling from the ceiling. Right. It's a very safe structure in here. So speaking of Florida fiascos, this week I tried to do something little bit different. Yeah so far what we've noticed is almost everything we talk about is criminal related. Okay. but there's a lot of crazy shit that happens in Florida that's not just criminal related. You know what I mean? So and it's hard to get away from it because when you look at the a lot of them are fucking funny, but it's funny you say that because I was looking at the same fucking thing. Well, mine is definitely a crime. Okay. But no, so I I was thinking that same thing. We we always come up with a a case, a a investigation or you know, a murder charge or you know what I mean? So it's always a crime, but I I had the same similar That's funny. I'm glad we thought we do that makes sense why we found the same one. So makes sense why we're fucking the same why we're podcast house together. So, my story. Florida fiasco. On September 9th, 2025, an 82-year-old Florida man, Edward Wells, and his dog Bailey miraculously survived an encounter with a massive 300 pound wild boar. Whoa. That shattered through their sliding glass door into the fucking living room. And this took place in Lehigh Acres, Florida, leaving the homeowner completely stunned. So the incident, right? Wells is relaxing on his couch when a tremendous crash took in the house and he initially feared his home was being bombed. Cause I am sure a 300-pound boar running through some glass makes a loud fucking while. fuck yeah, it does. The intruder turned out to be an enormous feral hog. So it shattered through the glass and immediately attacked the family dog Bailey. After the altercation, the animal refused to leave, loordering inside the house for up to 45 minutes to an hour while Wells resiliently had to stay up on his counter to keep a distance from the boar. Wow. Lee County deputies responded to the scene, engaged in a chaotic face-to-face wrangling match with the uncooperative animal, which was captured by police on body camera. Fuck yeah. Fuck. Despite their best efforts to secure the hog. Beast put up a heavy fight and eventually escaped back into the wild. Fortunately. So they didn't catch him. They didn't catch him. He's still on the loose. So it is criminal activity. It is. so fortunately, Bailey the dog survived the attack recovering with just receiving some stitches, which is, you know, surprising because can be fucking violent. Pigs have one of the hardest bites in the fucking world, from what I understand. I mean, I'm not much of a pig farmer, pig fucker, but I hear they bite really hard actually. I know they'll chew through a whole human, right? Yeah. Everything but the fucking teeth and nails or some shit. And and they're like hippos, aren't they? Where their tusks keep growing or something like that. Yeah, forever and shit like that. Yeah. So imagine a three hundred pound wild boar smashes through your waking siding glass door. Listen, Pumba comes through the door, Timote on the back, and they're like, Get this go to matata motherfucker You know, and go after what is it? Was it a chihuahua? I'm I think I missed that part. I actually did not say the type of dog it was. that's funny. if it's Schwa's dead, bro. fuck, yeah. It's had to a great dane or something. Yeah, it had to be a big motherfucker. The boar's just all jacked up on cocaine because it's Florida. Miami Vice. It's all like, man, fuck that dog over there. He's always out here barking at me, talking shit. I ain't gonna take it no more, man. I'm gonna go get that motherfucker. And he he's a boar. He doesn't know there's glass there. No he just thinks it's an opening. They ain't that smart. Well, I look at look at how many Birds fly into windows and shit. And they're stupid as shit. And they're stupid. And they got good eyes. Yeah. I assume Timon ain't seeing that well. So he runs to a c my bad. Pumba ain't seeing that well. Timon don't see either. He's a mere cat, they're supposed to see. Look at that. The only thing that would have made the story better was with a fucking what's it called? If there was a mere cat on the not fucking the mere cat. I want it to be a honey badger. Like Boar runs in, attacks the dog, honey badger jumps on the dude, steals the food, leaves. You know what I mean? But just just imagine, bro, you're sitting there on your couch watching fucking I don't know, porn or whatever they do in Florida. You're watching The Lion King. How fucking ironic. The Lion King 1.5. And here comes Timona Puma through your fucking sliding glass door. That fucking bang has got to be intense. Guys, by the way, I don't know if you caught this part. When this happened, eighty-two years old. Shitting himself. Shitting himself. Immediately. And he heard it, freaked the fuck out, looks over. Hopefully it not is Chihuahua or Yorkie or something. maybe it's a dog with a rat rile, you a tough guy. He had one them fucking bull masters. Yeah, something big and just getting fucked up by a wild hog, and you're like, my god, what is happening? man. And then you have to climb your ass up on your counter. Which is fucking again, what, eighty three? Yeah. Yeah. He's still old. You have to climb your ass up on a counter. Probably with your dog too, I'd assume, because obviously he released him at one point, you know what I mean? Yeah. And he has to just sit up there for forty five minutes while this boar's just running around his house going, Fuck you, fuck you. Cops show up and you're like, thank God the police are here. Yeah. They're like, they're in there for another. But the problem is they're not gonna shoot the fucking thing. Most of the time, like they'll they'll shoot a dog because they accidentally bit somebody, but then they're like, it's well in we'll you what happened to Harambe. Yeah, but yeah. That's where all our world problems started, bro. But up until Harambre, we were doing good. Miss you, buddy. Yeah. Our dicks out from Harambe. And so imagine you're up on the counter, scared shitless forty-five minutes, police show up, they wrestle with this motherfucker for another forty-five minutes, can't get out this hog is like, This is my house, bitch. What are you gonna do? You know how we had that conversation about the bear, leave. That's yeah. You can't do that in Florida, everywhere. Well you can't you especially can't do that because those boars are are violent, dude. Aggressive. They're like legitimately Tasmanian devil from the cartoon. Yeah. that's that is how I perceive those animals, because They tear through shit. And if you've ever seen him in a video or whatever, they're not small. Yeah. 300 pounds for that size of animal. picture, picture a great dane, but he weighs 300 pounds and he's built like a brick ship's house. House with the hardest bite out there, dude. Yeah, they're they're massive. Yeah, so you think your fucking your house is just being bombed. He becomes a boar fucking up your dog. Well he's 83. He probably thought it was Iwo Jima. Yeah. That could happen. He's I had a fucking Vietnam flashback. And the really funny part is again, you're in you're in Florida, you're a criminal. I assume you might like fuck Swatsy. he's an eighty-three year old criminal that just got away until now. Fuck. They finally got me. He's all like, and that's all he does. You got me. Yeah. No. I'll go peacefully. Hey, make sure you grab my Kalazomi bag. Fucking and poor Bailey's just over there minding their business. And I gotta imagine, man, with the exception of the fact that it's on cocaine that's just fucking everybody up in the Well the cocaine bear. Yeah. What was this boar vendetta against this dog? Just another animal. He just seen this and was I'm gonna get him. I'm gonna get him. Like, was there other boars out there where I'm like, you won't run in there? You ain't you ain't got it, Gerald. You ain't gonna go get him. You ain't got a hair on your ass. You ain't gonna get him. You yell at motherfuckers. yeah. Watch this. Next thing he runs out hour and a half later fuck them people. Francis. Okay, hold me down. And the boys just goes on minding his business. Meanwhile, this 82 year old man is fucking traumatized the rest of his life. He probably shit himself. We should do a a version of this segment called Did He Shit Himself. Did he shit himself? We know the guy on the telephone pole didn't. Yeah, yeah, because the first one was a fucking hoax. That is my Florida fiasco. like I said, not not too in-depth, but a funny fucking story, buddy. You gotta picture this in your head and you're gonna be happy about it. Well, that's pretty good. It's pretty good. I'm just I'm gonna hit it. I'm not even gonna say anything else. Florida man allegedly caught getting freaky with a vacuum cleaner. Mom, I told you that if you didn't run me when I'll clean my room. And I verified this, it is real. So I did something I don't normally do today. I usually go and I and I boom, The first one I saw was great. I found it on my phone and I was still laying in bed, it was like 410 at that point. I got up and I went to go put it on my computer so that I could, you know, type up the synopsis and everything. I typed in Florida and then it. Auto filled. Yeah, it auto filled and went man caught getting freaky with a vacuum cleaner. And I'm like, that first that first one was stupid. So I'm hooked. So according to reporting, 51 year old Kevin Dale, Western Hold, was arrested after witness allegedly observed and recorded him. I can't find the fucking footage, but Recorded him engaging in sexual activity. I'll go fuck a vacuum right now if we need the footage. We'll make it look like Florida. No, I tried to get I tried to get AI to get me like a cartoonish thing with a dude holding a vacuum cleaner hand. No, dude, just do me a favor and put up put up Dewey from s Scary Movie One. Perfect. I'm just walking around. Okay, I told you I can't remember cleaning my room. It's that's exactly what I thought of. so they allegedly observed and recorded him engaging in sexual activity with a vacuum cleaner outside a resort residence. in Osola County. Authorities also investigated reports of previous public nudity with security footage reportedly supporting some of those allegations. So he's he's kind of a repeat offender. He likes fucking vacuums. Right. So the the important distinction is that these allegations described in arrest reporting are not findings of guilt. Actually so the Osala County Sheriff's Office confirmed that the arrest and additional reporting uncovered several interesting details. So January twenty first, a resident reported seeing a nude man in a shared hallway. So again, it's a or resort residence. So they have shared hallways. It's like a hotel, right? Yeah. so January twenty second. Probably he's fifty one. January twenty second, witness allegedly recorded the vacuum cleaner incident outside of a residence. at this point, he's not even trying to hide it. December 2025, residents had already complained to the homeowners association about a similar behavior. January 27th, so after his fiasco with the vacuum cleaner, police arrested Westerhold near his home, Westerhold and his wife. were listed as hosts of properties at the resort. And Airbnb later confirmed that he had been removed from, The legal outcome reported in April, pleaded not guilty and was released on a $2,500 bond. haven't confirmed a final deposition.

Technical Difficulties 03: Alright, so what you're saying is he has a wife, right? Yeah, he's got a wife. Yeah. Well, this is obviously her fault then. I mean put her on trial, but if you gotta go for a vacuum cleaner, your wife is just not not doing it, right? I mean them new vacuum cleaners be pretty fucking sexy these days, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah, it's like Dyson? Hey shit, Lassandra just got that new Dyson, you know what I'm saying? No, no, I I I agree. I agree with that. Unless it's some weird kink. I don't know. In this situation, she's the asshole. She's the asshole. am I the asshole for getting my husband arrested because I wouldn't live up, so he had to have sexual intercourse with the vacuum? Yes, yes, you are. No, I just want to know if he was using a cordless vacuum or if he had to like run an extension cable. But I think because obviously people are out and he's outside. People are seeing him. So I mean it has to have either be a cordless vacuum or Well he's got a fucking hundred and seventy five foot. We both know those cordless vacuums ain't sucking strong enough to make something happen. And follow up question like what if he's just outside vacuuming his carpet or something like that, because what's happening. He's just going, like, it's again, it's it's Miami or it's it's it's Florida, you know, I'm sure somewhere nice and tropical. He's seen some nice, you know, young things walking around in thong bikinis. He's like, you know what? I'ma fuck my vacuum. I'm gonna fuck my vacuum. it really isn't that fucking like bizarre. Officer Dewey's doing it. It isn't that fucking bizarre. No, but Florida. It's not that bizarre for Florida. It's really not. so does the vacuum then get listed as evidence or witness? I'm pretty sure this is the plot to i robot. No fucking way. It's a pretty fucking good takeaway actually. It's a pretty good fucking takeaway. But take it for me that if they do come out with sex robots, I don't care what job I'm doing, I'm quitting and going selling those because they sell themselves. It's gonna be the easiest fucking sell. One hundred percent they sell themselves. I that is literally the easiest sell. And we both especially if they look like Megan Fox. It it's gonna be in Florida. That's where they're gonna do the test launch. It's gonna be Florida. Alabama would be like, wow, my cousin's already here. I don't really need vac robot just. I I just want to know who who looks at a vacuum and just goes, that's the one. That's the one. Could you imagine him like pulling out the hose and just looking at it? it'll it'll fit. And he's heading out so did you say it'll fit? It mind your business. Mind your business. can you imagine whenever he was trying it on in Sears? Right? fuck. You know, when you go down to the local home depot and fucking look at look at vacuum cleaners and all of a sudden you're like, was it a Dyson? Was it a cheap Walmart one? Was it a was it was this guy going I mean, he he's obviously hitting a pitch with a fender as we described. So like it might have to be a shop vac at this point. Yeah, I could not get a definitive answer on what type of vacuum it was. So that's that's where they'll after the desposition do they don't want to release that vacuum all of a sudden. you you you're not having a good Kirby advertisement after that's your new headline. you you want to come to my house and you want to sell me a vacuum. But look what Dyson did. Look what Does your vacuum do this? Yeah. Well, why are we talking? Imagine being a neighbor who has to explain this shit to the police, man. Like we gotta we gotta I'm not really sure. No, do you hear you hear the ladies all like, My neighbor is fucking a vacuum? And then the the back of the No, you're right in Florida. Yeah, you hear the husband all like, We've been told you guys it's fucking weird. Nobody's done shit about it. What are you guys gonna fuck? She's all like, I'm sorry, man, what was that? he's fucking a vacuum and we can all see him. 'Cause it was from twenty twenty five December. And he's finished. He's finished. He's finished. You guys wanna come clean this up? Set in the fire department. is it illegal to record somebody fucking a vacuum? That's a good question. Yeah. That's a great question. Counter suit. You're you are infringing on my rights. Yeah, privacy. But I mean, if you're out in public, you have no right to privacy. Well, I know they've had some serious cases actually about things like that where like dudes like walk around their backyards, you know, dick hanging out in a robe or something like that, and there's kids that live around them. And they unfortunately couldn't do anything about it. Because he's on his own private property. you can see through his fence, so sorry, Yeah, but when you're jerking off in the in the fucking garage with the door open. I don't think you get away with that whenever you're like, why'd you fuck the vacuum? And he's like, Well, I just I what happened was they let him out on a twenty five hundred dollar bond. They probab the judge was probably like, get the shit out of here. I can't I can't deal with this today, man. can't deal with it. Who's got the coke? How do you explain yourself though? how do you how do you start that conversation with easy? Can you tell me? How fucking horny? Well, look, I I I was again I seen these girls and I looked down at the hose and looked at the girl. Hey, rather than get a fucking rape charge, I fucked the vacuum. You're welcome. Yeah, it's her fault for what she was wearing. You're not looking for another fucking criminal, okay? No, I just fucked my vacuum in front of my car. Okay. The only witness really is my car, and she should be ashamed of herself. she don't snitch. Yeah. The neighbor that reports it in is is probably the thought process is probably like, What is that? Is that a vacuum? Is he? Are you No fucking way Daryl, come look at this. I hope he's shirtcocking it. He's shirtcocking it. Straight cock it. Just no pants. Or he's just he's just a fucking weird guy anyway, obviously. He just walks around in speedos. He's like, it's for easy access. In my mind, it it went along the lines of what you were saying about cleaning his car. But so he comes out of his condo or whatever it is, and he just already just has a shirt on, no pants, just wearing flip-flops, and then goes to the car and be I got a vet. yeah. Fucking Jerry's at it again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It just kind of reminds me that one video back in the day I think it was Tosh point and he was like. The it was like this old dude and he's got a Speedo on. He's like the wild women, the ripping and the tearing. So that's just kinda I mean, it looks that's Florida. Well we gotta well we we gotta really start doing this whenever we get to be full time and start being able to find a way to get these recordings of the police getting called on this shit. So we can like play those clips in there. Cause like we I gotta hear that other side. Yeah. I wanna be the nine one one dispatcher on that one. could you imagine? They release fucking clips like that all the time, bro. Could you imagine being there? You're just sitting there. Nine one one, what's your emergency? Yeah, my neighbor's fucking his vacuum. Yeah. I don't hits the but hits the pause button, the mute button. You're not gonna fucking believe this shit. Susan, Susan, Daryl's at it again. obviously Jen and Chance talk about their neighbor who's a little fucking crazy, right? Crazy. And like whenever you call the cops on they're like, we know. We yeah, we know. So it's got it Florida's gotta just It's gotta be the same. But imagine what we do is like we start saying, All right you guys, welcome to Florida Fiascos. We don't say a fucking thing. Yeah. We just hit play. And hear the fucking report from the the nine one one call of the guy like there's a thing in my house fucking on my daughter. You know, go to this one. My neighbor's fucking a vacuum cleaner, you guys need to stop him like, Well, is is is is he in his own house? No. No, he's on the porch. He's out on the fucking curb. we'll send somebody out there. How's long is that extension cord? It's wireless. And then all I can think about is like the other guys' movies where there's just two cops in a car fucking pumping, just pumping, just fucking pumping with the guns ready, rocking out to some music. Be we're gonna go get this fucking. We're gonna do something great today. And they're like, report of whatever code eighty four ninety two it is of a indecent exposure. man is fucking a vac or a man is having sexual intercourse with a vacuum, I would imagine that that was his charge, was indecent exposure. I would assume so. not really a felony, But being released on a twenty five hundred dollar bond, it's not that serious. Yeah. it's Florida, so it's not any of them are serious. The dude that climbed the fucking traffic pole and caused a bunch of traffic jams. We gotta start doing this shit for a fucking living so we can get these people's information and search them up and be like, hey, we want to do a quick interview with you. And there's gonna be like again. Man, it was one vacuum one time. But when it comes out it's thirteen vacuum, forty-five different times. So actually we really just want to talk to the Dyson. is she a vacuum? It comes out. He's he's wanted in thirty different states just for fucking vacuum cleaners. Nebraska, w they want fucking extra dynamic 'cause he 'cause cause he walked into a local Walmart super center and was like, Yep, this one. Telling you, man, it would be such a full-time job just to get this shit together. Like I said, imagine imagine how cool it would be to interview the fucking lawyer that took the case to try to sue Reese's. Yeah. You know what I mean? He's no, I think I can take him. And then at the end of the thing, his big fucking win is, well, I made him change the label. Like, dude, dude. I wanna. Did you get anything from that? I was bored. and I said, fuck it, let's do this. Well, you that lawyer actually got paid, probably. yeah. Yeah, yeah. Even the lawyer sitting there like, Can we at least get my fees covered? And Hershey's like, If you shut the fuck up, yes. Well, case dismissed. Your Honor, we won't not be pressing charges. the defendant's just sitting there The fuck. This is my trial. Nobody cares, Susan. Or like last week with the fucking Philly cheeses steak lawyer, he's probably like Well, I mean, we know he was like, Hey, I'll just buy the fucking thing. Yeah. Right now, I'm prepared to do that. Yeah. Not even a public defender, sir. I just graduated college seven months ago. So when you're paid hourly by the firm, fucking let it go. Yeah, he stayed paid, bro. So yeah. I mean, unless this guy affords some fucking high class lawyer, but it's it's this is gonna come full circle one day whenever we're like, so I have a clip to play for you, Gary, and it's just gonna be the nine one one operator phone calls. So here is James here to tell us about him and his vacuum. Yeah, I I love her. we've been together for thirteen years. I know my truth. I know my truth. I know my truth. I know my truth. I make love with my Dyson. She has two holes. I mean You wanna you want a blow job or you want a suck job? Anyway, yeah. I think they're both very good stories this week. I I think I'm glad that we didn't get the same fucking one again. 'Cause now it's just gonna get annoying. Yeah. Hey, if we make it to episode three hundred now and it happens again, a bit party. Fair. Fucking party only fifty two weeks in a year. It can only happen so many times in a year. No. You like I said It could happen fifty two fucking times though. And Amanda was nice enough to try to send me another one. I'm like, no, bitch, did you watch the last episode? She's Yeah, but I seen this one. I'm like, No, I don't trust you. You guys are in cahoots, you're trying to ruin our fucking shine here. And then she was actually even nice enough to say, No, if I tried to research a Veta, it was fake. And I'm like, good, because I don't want you to make me look like an asshole. Yeah, if no, if you are gonna send them in, at least at least do a little vetting and and and make sure that you fucking fifty dollar gift card to Target if you get us the recording from the nine one one dispatch to I will make that happen. Yes. The Florida fiascos, I wanna say it was mainly your idea and I'm gonna give you credit for it because it is truly whenever I'm laying in bed thinking about it, that often pops into my head. Like I'm still wondering where the fuck our baby formula mafias at like like there's so many questions I have still about all these people. I I don't even remember how it came up in in it was just a thought like, we could just do like stupid Florida man does this and then it blossomed into Florida fiascos and that's what we have now. It is not disappointed either. It's not. It's great. And I mean, the unfortunate celebration of of having the same one last episode, it's just a fluke. We're gonna keep going, we're gonna keep finding great things because you know what? Florida, they have lots of stories. Florida don't miss. Miami, baby. Miami, yeah. Some may call it By city? By city. All right, so unless you've been living under a rock for the past decade, you know that one of the most anticipated games of all time, Grand Theft Auto Six, is coming out, is finally getting ready to launch. November tw nineteenth, twenty twenty six. Mod's already downloaded, man. Mine is too, man. I'm I'm super excited. You got the PS5, I got a Series X, and so hopefully, you know, when they do release, you know, Grand Theft Auto online, we will be playing together. so obviously look for that boosted underscore Beba. Yeah, it's right here. so after all those years of w waiting with multiple delays and and you know, absolutely ridiculous amount of internet speculation, we're finally heading back to Vice City. But this isn't just the Vice City we remember from the early 2000s. Rockstar is introducing an entire fictional state called Leonida. Heavily inspired by Florida. were talking beautiful beaches, neon lit nightlife, massive cities, swamps, alligators, and probably more questionable life decisions than a typical Florida man news report. You think? I mean, yeah. We've been reading these for quite a while. They got some questionable life decisions, bro. Yeah, but I mean, ultimately, with with a video game that you could do anything in, there's a lot to So, what's the first thing you plan on doing in Grand Theft Auto Six, and why is it killing a hook? Fuck you. well let me get into my speculation and I will absolutely fucking tell you why. But also my speculation I think you're gonna love and it's not just my speculation, it is it is it's you know, fan found. So it's it's not confirmed by Rockstar, I don't even know if Grand Theft Auto Six is confirmed by Rockstar at this point in the world. No, it's it's really not. Fictional characters. Yeah. speaking of characters, the the game follows two main protagonists, Jason Duval and a first time ever female playable character, Lucia Caminos. A criminal couple who find themselves caught up in a massive conspiracy after robbery goes wrong. Think Bonnie and Clyde with fast cars, modern tech, social media, and the absolute insanity that comes from Grand Theft Auto, And Rockstar is promising a massive, detailed world filled with colorful characters, criminal organizations, and the kind of over-the-top satire that made the franchise famous, They hold no bars. They are the South Park of video games. Absolutely. look, Red Dead was great. Red Dead 2, great. Theft Auto 5 has been out for 13 years. Wow. that's a really long time for people to go back every day to play the same exact game. They are still playing. I mean, Don't get me wrong, I love Grand Theft Auto 5. I've beaten that game on every console I've ever owned. So now going into Grand Theft Auto 6, everybody's anticipating it, But there's a lot of fans who are, you know, anticipating some Easter eggs because that's what Rockstar is known for is a lot of Easter eggs. So for anybody who's watched the television series Dexter, you'll remember Dexter Morgan, the Miami blood spatter analyst who secretly moonlights as a serial killer. And of course, the infamous. Nickname associated with his murders, the Bay Harbor Butcher. Well, apparently some eagle-eyed GTA fan has spotted something in a rockstar footage that looks awfully familiar. During the extended GTA 6 preview, fans noticed a waterfront apartment building that bears a striking resemblance to the Dexter Morgan apartment from the television series. And we're not just talking some random building next to the ocean. Fans have pointed out similarities between the building's shape, exterior staircases, walkways, and overall layout. The real life building used in Dexter is located at the Bay Harbor Club in Miami. And considering that Vice City is Rockstar's fictional version of Miami, it would make perfect sense for them to recreate recognizable city locations, Is this just Rockstar faithfully recreating Miami architecture? Or is it an Easter egg referencing one of television's most famous fictional serial killers? Now, before anybody gets too excited, obviously we said Rockstar has not confirmed that a Dexter Morgan is actually in GTA 6. There's no confirmed mission. There's no Bay Harbor Butcher storyline confirm. It's just purely speculation. But the fact that there is a correlation between the real world actual building that's there. And the one that's in the game, it looks identical. It's it's really fucking close. I would take my hat off to Rockstar if I I would lose my shit. If we started playing it and all of a sudden it's actually about, a fucking serial killer gun just changed the whole game up, Absolutely. Imagine spl exploring Vice City and discovering that apartment, and it looks exactly like Dexter's or stumbling across a fictional serial killer investigation inspired by the Bay Harbor butcher. Right. That'd be pretty cool. Maybe even finding Suspicious collection of blood slides. Mm-hmm. Opening up the A. You have to go, you have to go around the map and you have to find each blood slide. Yeah. Rockstar, hit me up for a little bit of money because that's a great fucking Halloween mission. So that would be absolutely insane. I think that would be awesome. Well, I mean the hard part is there is so much stuff that happens in Florida. Yeah. And like couldn't they do Real life Florida things, not even fictional Florida things, and they could probably still fucking make some pretty cool shit happen. Well, I they had what wasn't the first no that was Las Vegas, right? No. CSI? Mm-hmm. Was that Miami first or was that Las Vegas? No, CSI Miami was a different show after CSI Las Vegas was a different show after just CSI was based like New York or something. was it? Yeah. But they had CSI Miami, CSI Las Vegas. Yeah, I remember the dude with the glasses, Looks like this one's overbaked. You know. Some stupid one liner that They thought we were like, this will hook Yeah. And then they did it like a nineteen season thing. So it must have worked. What I want to talk about though is one of the big new features of the game, right? So we've already talked about Grand Theft Auto returning to Bicity. We've already talked about the possibility of the Easter egg, but there's a huge part of this game that's getting a lot of attention, right? And honestly, it could change the way we play Grand Theft Auto. so one of the biggest changes being discussed is a more advanced witness system. Instead of every crime being instantly triggered. To a police response. The idea is that someone might actually have to witness it and report it. Imagine robbing a convenience store, a customer sees you, calls the police, and then suddenly the cops have a description of that suspect, right? Now imagine there's a security camera recording the whole thing. Instead of just knowing where the crime happened, the police could potentially have more information, what you look like, what you're wearing, what you drove away in. So it's a completely different level of police. pursuit, So you're saying it's gonna teach us how to be better criminals. Yeah, absolutely not. Don't take that away from this because I I we want Grand Theft Auto Seven. I mean this already such a controversial game because how long has it been out and that is the same argument every time. Well it's teaching kids how to be bad, it's teaching kids to steal cars, it's teaching kids to fuck hookers and then kill can get my money back. Wait, I pay you when I leave? What if you don't leave? Well, so is there a statue of limitations? So you rob the convenience store, you have surveillance. Is it like within, you know, at two hours of game time, they could still come after you for that old crime you did? Or is it like So this is the interesting part. Let's okay, for instance, you're driving that same car and you'd roll through that part of town that you just went and real life couple hours later. You drive through that same spot in that same car. Somebody's gonna remember that somebody drove off in that car. Because all of the cars are now registered. have to pay for gas. You have to pay for, you know, obviously the same thing like repairs. Wow. It doesn't take very long to fill up and fix and all that stuff, thank goodness. But that's where it changes, right? So I mean, in Grand Theft Auto Five, you could go rob a convenience store. Go change the color of the car and the, 150 bucks. 150 bucks. And then come back out. And the cop could even be sitting there and go. you see that guy in a green caprice? No, it was a red one. Yeah. Well, there was a guy that matching your description, holding a gold gun. And you're just sitting there. No, I haven't seen him. No. And you could just totally get away with it. Well, one of the things I seen too was like buses and trains, right? They're like so if you're if you're hiding from the cops and you know the cops don't see you get on a bus, you can get on the bus and now you're getting away. Yeah, clean get away. When before that wouldn't happen, you know what I mean? You'd just get fucking caught. Which I I think ultimately is what I'm gonna try first to to get away with a crime. Because So kill the hooker, get on the bus. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, absolutely. There's a whole criminal enterprise to this whole game. and I think it's really, fascinating how they've they've, changed the wanted system. each, playable character has a A crime profile. Yeah. So I mean there's and there's different levels to it. If you go too far, you're psycho and and and if you get too far on that, it'll crack and that's how you get to stay for the rest of your gameplay, I I really wanna try and keep it clean, man. I like it just like Red Dead too, that that psychoanalysis feature of the whole game. That's pretty cool. Where he gets like worried and shit. Yeah. Yeah. I I wanna I wanna try and keep it clean. Do you? I do. So you're just gonna follow some storyline and obviously do the crimes you're forced to do, but try not to draw attention to yourself outside of that. Right. Well, I'll do a couple of different gameplays, of course, and and you know, the second one I'll just I'll make Jason fat right out of the gate. well, so like this is you have to like buy money in this game, right? they're giving you money for signing up and stuff like that. So I said if you're paying for gas, you're paying for repairs, you're paying, you're paying, you're paying, you're paying. can you create multiple accounts and do that same thing? Well, it's a game save. That's all it boils down to. Yeah, you can purchase, in game credits with real money, but there's plenty of opportunities around Leonida to, you know, make the money back. Yeah. Okay. So you can actually play a couple of different ways and see how it all goes. Yeah. That's gonna be interesting. Well, you're talking eighty hours of gameplay too. Eighty plus hours of gameplay. That was just one guy's playthrough and he did I don't think he got everything. Yeah, obviously not. And with over a hundred and seventy different species, I'm hunting every single one. I'm I'm a hunt every fucking single one. What about the like do you think they got any callbacks to the other characters? Like do we get to see fucking no Trevor or I I wouldn't think that you would see Trevor or Michael or Calvin? No Carl. Carl, CJ, Carl. CJ is from San Andreas. Yeah. but Franklin is from five. No, I don't think that there'll be anybody from from those, possibly from the Versetti family. But anyway, so there's obviously Vice Cities and Vice City stories the original character I think is dead because in the second one, Vice City stories or whatever it was, you kill him. Yeah. Yeah. so I don't think that there's gonna be a whole hell of a lot. And I also think that Tommy's dead too. Yeah. from the second one. That's also good. So I know of a few like not playable characters that that are probably gonna come back, like in Grand Theft Auto Four, one with Nico. So he finds a diamond and you and he says something along the lines of I'm going to Vice City. So that's a potential for a Call back to a different character. And this is called Grand Theft Auto Six. There is no Vice City, there is no San Andreas. It's just Grand Theft Auto. Grand Theft Auto Six. Okay. Cause it's all based in that new town. Yeah. Leonida. Leonida. It's it's a state technique. so it's and like you said, the fucking gameplay map looks big enough to be a whole state. So just the Vice City area itself is Rockstar said it was like three times the size of San Andreas or like Los Santos. Los Santos. So it's it's like three times the size of that. And then the rest of it is you could fit GTA five, GTA four, and Vice City all on the same map. It's that big. I seen something about like real time jail, like real time sentences. And it's not I mean not like not saying you get two years or anything, but it's like you have to actually spend time in jail if you get caught up. It's not like That'd be cool, cause then you just get swollen too. Yeah, but I say you guys, well, you you network like a motherfucker, bro. this sounds like the way to do it. Yeah. But I don't know, maybe that's a mission where you end up getting, locked up for a couple days or something like that. But it said something about there's a potential for real hard time is what I said. Well, as the game starts, you know, obviously Lucia is still in prison because some sort of snafu, and then Jason goes and picks her up. So obviously I haven't seen much gameplay because I don't think there is really much of it out there. I know there was that dude who who leaked a bunch of shit, but I cannot find it. if they're like smart like Marvel and all that stuff they leaked as fake? you Marvel where this is fake. It's really not it's really not Vice City, it's like fucking Las Vegas. Nebraska. Nebraska. What the fuck are we doing out here? Tulsa King, bro. Let's do that one. Yeah. Yeah. I want to play as fucking Dwight Man friend without the cane. Pre cane. Pre cane. Pre cane. The idea of let's say getting caught up on a bank robbery and you get sentenced to three years and that really means like you're in fucking jail for three hours at a game away and you can't do anything else like that. Well and I think if that was a thing, I think that would be cool because then you can, upgrade your criminal, enterprise at that point. Because now you're in jail with all these or prison with all these hardened criminals, why not get on your payroll? Yeah. That would be so cool. Whole different side of the story, you know what I mean? Now you're all of a sudden well, cause it sucks going to jail. We all know that. But you're like, Well, that's how I met the family that did this or the boss that did that. That's how I found out how to Hey, how come you got caught? I don't know, man. A Robert Convenus store. you take out the cameras? fuck, I gotta take out the cameras. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. so the other thing that's different is now we're back to a six star wanted level. early, early games were six stars, whereas Grand Theft Auto V was only on five stars. Five stars. And so, know, we we talked about how you know the difference in the cops, right? So they can they can recognize you. They're not just looking for you. You can't just go hide behind a building and escape Now this is not online gameplay at first, right? It is not. So we don't have to worry about some massive server crash and we can't play our PlayStations anymore or anything? I would assume not, but Then again, I don't know how it all works with a downloaded game versus a disc. I don't know because I'm been on PC for so long. I don't know. So I couldn't speculate if it's like server based. I would imagine it's not because all that content we downloaded, two hundred fucking ten gigabytes. It's crazy. What's the what's your average gameplay time? not just spent hours in Elder Scrolls or something like that. But what's what's a normal story through? twenty hours? Twenty, twenty five, yeah. Maybe forty so we're talking again. Almost, three times as much as almost every other video game out there. Yeah. there's there's a a couple of long games out there, but but usually those long games have like it's because they've expanded, like I said, like elder scrolls and shit like that, right? Like that was that's just a short game that they added on to and added on to. Speaking of which I finally beat Wolverine. Did you? Yeah, because I was all excited about having Wolverine and then we started playing, you know, Warzone and Call of Duty more. So I kind took over. So but finally and that only took fifteen hours, you know what I mean? that's and I'm not saying I thought it was a long game by any stretch, but I was I was like, God damn, I remember playing a couple spots, you're like, This can't be the end of the game already. Well no, no, no, okay, there's one more. I still thought that was a decent amount of time after going through it all. So I and that's fifteen hours of gameplay. I don't know, maybe I'm just a snob, but when a new game is coming out, I want it to be long. I don't want a fifteen hour game. I'm sorry, I don't. It to me That just feels like one, they didn't put enough effort into it. And two, doesn't seem worth my time playing because I want a game that'll fully immerse myself in and just kinda like, take the hours and hours away, you know. Yeah. listen, it's this gonna come as a shock to some people. Or maybe not, because you know me. But I've got seventeen hundred hours in in Call of Duty. Yeah. And that's just from November twenty twenty four till today. That's a lot of hours. That's a lot of hours in two years. and I I chances probably six thousand hours in CSGO or whatever it was, or Tarkov or whatever. But that's a long fucking time. A lot of hours. And of course, with Call of Duty, it's over three different games now. So it's Black Ops six, Black Ops seven, and now Modern Warfare Four. That's all over those those three games. But when you think about it, it's not a different game. No. Yeah, this is whole new story. This is a whole new everything. So that's pretty crazy. But I could see but this is not including the online play, whenever you get to hang out with friends and everything like that. This is just pure storyline. Because then there's all a whole nother criminal enterprise to explore. there's tons of new cars, for the first time ever actually seen a dually pickup. And I thought that was pretty cool 'cause I mean I'm I'm a car guy, so I like to see changes and be so pissed off when the tread on my tires goes bald in my car and grant the thought on it to pay to go replace something like that's Bullshit, man. I this is a big Just go steal the money. Go steal the money. Why? They got cameras out. So I mean, do you want a a realistic police system in Grand Theft Auto? I I think it'd be cooler. Yeah. I think it'd be cool. And again, like so just to be clear, I played Metal Gear Solid trying to get through the entire game without ever getting caught once. You know what I mean? I like that aspect of it, you know. So I like the creativeness to be able to do something like that. Obviously I Again, it's not gonna be like the they can't see me. you're not just gonna you're not just gonna put a cardboard box over yourself, you're doing but that idea of it I think would be pretty cool. Everything being a little more sneaky, a little more repercussions. Like you have repercussions for doing stupid shit. You know, well and and that's that's exactly what the the criminal profile really does. I mean it holds you accountable for what you're doing. don't kill somebody if you don't have to. Yeah. You know what I mean? And I think that was like the same with Red Dead Two. you got a bad rap for it. And totally different water system, of course, for GTA six and you know, Red Dead, but I'm I'm gonna try and do it clean. I'm gonna try and get away scot free, you know. Well, you know, the downside is unless you just don't do anything wrong, you're gonna have to learn what you do wrong in order to get it right. So it's gonna be hard to stay clean, you know what I mean? But Well, and and apparently there's some, you know, story missions. That you have to kill So it doesn't go against you. Yeah, no, I'd assume not. That's pretty interesting. But just like driving down the sidewalk. It's still completely open world, just like anything else was. Unless you're in an actual mission, I actually had this theory that if I went upstate Leonida and I and I stole a car there, went, got it resprayed and spent what I don't know how much it is gonna be, but you know, register it. Well, inflation's pretty much fucked us now. It was a hundred dollar game, so that I spent four hundred dollars trying to play two monitors and a fucking capture card later. Yeah, yeah. I didn't even buy the capture card. I had to get that four hundred dollar fucking hard drive just to be able to fit it. Yeah. You know, got it for a joke, but that's just because we got lucky. But do you feel about video games now charging the same amount of money for a video game without even a hard disk distribution being needed? I don't care. You don't care. I have a PC. Doesn't matter, dude. I have a PC. I don't it doesn't it doesn't fucking bother me. The other thing too, it doesn't bother me that you think I don't own I don't care. It doesn't fucking bother me. And the people that that it bothers, you're just uppity. Well, it's like it's like a self checkout at Walmart, right? I don't get paid to do that shit. My groceries should be cheaper now if if you're saving labor on that. But they're not. They're more expensive. You know what I mean? So why is a game getting more expensive with less distribution cost? I remember whatever video games obviously came out in nineteen ninety nine, PlayStation one, PlayStation Two days. By the time give video games hit thirty, forty bucks, people were freaking out. By the time they get sixty bucks, yeah. Everybody's like, What the fuck? You're like, Well, distribution and materials and and it. Yeah. Now I'm just like, well, now you can just download it and give a shit about owning it or anything. Yeah, because if you bought a box, you just get a code to download it. Yeah, which is great. I know one of my one of my co-workers. I almost wanted to do that though. Yeah, well, he says like I have every poster from every one of them. I couldn't get one. I don't know. That's just it blows my mind that obviously this game's been in development for a long time, so they gotta pay the people and they gotta pay, for the development, right? So I could understand where the money went and how they can justify a hundred dollars on the Ultimate Edition, but I think you're right about, why is it so expensive if they're not distributing it? It's all online. Well yeah, and that's what I think is we were just talking about this the other day. I don't think video games, programs, anything like that is gonna be able to be a profitable business anymore. No 'cause AI is getting too smart, technology's getting too smart. Just like music, right? Like nobody cares about selling music anymore. They care about streams. Yep. Nobody cares about selling a fucking CD. Yep. If you do, good for you. if you want to be a vintage guy, I collect Clect Records and all that. I it was a long time ago, but the last C D that I got was an organized CD. So Yeah. But the it's it's going to eventually get to that place. I don't ever think AI is gonna create a Grand Theft Auto. I do believe that the video game industry, just like the movie industry, just like the music industry, will eventually be free. Free. It'll have to be. I mean, look at look at what fucking Fortnite did. Talk all the shit you want to. They changed the industry free. And eventually Rockstar is gonna have to adapt. You know what I mean? You're not gonna be the last one selling out saying like you have to have at least a free version of it. Look at Warzone. That's like basically coming out and saying, I'm not putting my CD on Amazon or iTunes. You can only listen to my music if you buy the CD. They're gonna be like, won't fucking buy it. Then I guess I won't listen to it. Or somebody Well, it's the most touching piece of art you've ever listening to. Don't care. My car didn't even have a fucking CD player. Yeah, they don't come with them. mine does. Yeah, but I they don't come with it. Very clearly they don't. but yeah, I I do think that's what we're heading. And like I said, it's gonna be because reasons of smart enough people sick of paying a hundred dollars a fucking video game. You know what I mean? Yeah. Now don't get me wrong. They come out and say any video game that ever comes out is twenty bucks. Yeah. Fucking worth it. You know what I mean? I'll give you my twenty bucks and then we call it cool. A hundred bucks, you got what, five games? Yeah. Right? You know what I'm saying? Then then that's what's gonna happen. You know what I mean? It's gonna be like, hey. We're not gonna we're not gonna go back and charge you tons of money, We're gonna make good quality product at this, because if they don't, they're gonna lose, And this is gonna be Rockstar's last big chance to make sure this happens because we are heading in there. I I'm talking the next 10 years, that's where we're heading. And I'm excited that we're gonna be playing Grand Theft Auto Six for the next 14 years, probably. Absolutely before we fucking die. Yeah. But no, I do think it's a I think it's a real conversation to be had and I bet you it's being had in the industry. Yeah. Well, and with the rumors of the of the you know systems not working the way they should and and only having thirty frames per second. you said something to me last night and I was just like, no, it that doesn't compute with me because I game at two hundred plus frames per second. I mean, I know the human eye can't dictate that over like sixty frames or whatever, or they say it's like a hundred and sixty or but I will notice I played Forza Horizon Six. It just came out this year. I played it on my PC and game. Then I was like, I could I could play this game sitting in my chair on my 85 inch TV. Nope. Because as soon as I loaded it up on the fucking big screen, it was choppy, terrible lines to the screen. And I mean, if you've if you've played on PC for as long as we have. Go back to a console, you're like, fuck, this sucks. Especially because those right there, that fucking thing sucks. going back to VHS. Yeah, absolutely. because a TV is not capable of pushing the type of power that you need to run a computer. I that sounds like a cynical asshole. Well, 'cause I give no fucks. I'm enjoying the gameplay. I'm not saying I'm not gonna enjoy it. There is a little blemish on her cheek that I noticed because of my 30 frames per second. don't get me wrong, you could obviously kill more people in Call of Duty because of the faster refreshment. I don't know. I don't know if that's it, but but to me, I just don't like choppy bullshit. I don't like watching it. I don't like playing something that's you know what I mean? It just irritates the fuck out of me. But I've never noticed that at all playing, but I've never actually played on a PC. I've never played on a PC. And you wouldn't I did too, motherfucker, Oregon Trail. What's up? Ten frames per second on a pixelated sixty-four bit game. It's great. It looks so good. So great. I was a PC gamer, bro. What are you talking about, man? Oregon Trail. Fuck yeah. Well, I think I think we do have a really blast of a game coming up. And of course, we're gonna cram next week and make sure that the episode's recorded and out before playing it. But hey, no promises. Look, we had a lot of technical difficulties tonight. That's why we put the name technical difficulties as our title this week. so going back to our previous segment of Friday the thirteenth, it's definitely Corey's fault. Obviously I'm gonna I'm gonna do my due diligence and get and get next week's episode out in a timely manner and and as soon as I can, man. I'm getting on it. I'm getting on it. Well any any other things you're pretty excited for for GTA six? Any one in like one fucking thing that you just can't wait to fucking do or see or any any speculations on how it's gonna end? Lucia's ass. Yeah. Yeah. She's got a big old dunker on her. I was just gonna say the strip clubs of this one are gonna be fucking live. Yeah. Yeah. Strip clubs of this one's are gonna be live. I might fuck a vacuum. Fuck yeah. Hey, invite me over. That's the that I gotta tell you, whenever I watch the first like trailer and they know they're like this is how great the quality's gonna be, I'm just sitting there like, There's there's still strip clubs, right? Yeah. Well, it's Miami. There better be. Yeah. Yeah. No, a there's a lot more to the game than than obviously that we explained here, but remember in Grand Theft Auto Five, you could ignore text messages and shit. You can't do that in this one. Yeah. Especially if you want to build a relationship with Lucia. You can't do that. Yeah, because I heard you could not even be together. no, it's not a question of whether or not you are together. It's whether or not you guys have a strong enough bond. Right. okay. So and it's just like being a criminal. You you are a criminal. It's just what type of criminal you want to be. So I don't know if making the relationship between the two characters romantic. Yes. Well, I heard like if you if if you're in a romantic relationship and you do like a strip club, she could get jealous. Well let her get fucked. And it could ruin your just take her. It could ruin your business. You know what I mean? Or it could ruin your upcoming thing, you know, which would be fucking crazy. Do it in the very beginning when she's still in jail. That's all I'm saying. Because I'm fairly certain we get to play before Lucia's out. So because there's a lot of snippets where he's still working down at the marina. And so I I think it's a couple hours of gameplay. He works at a marina. I I didn't see that part. He works in a marina? Yeah, he works at a marina. if that couldn't lay lay into the Bay Harbor butcher, I don't know what could. in Dexter, we were just talking about that, right? Like I said, he works in the harbor. Dexter's boat that he takes everybody out and dumps them is called the slice of life. So the first thing we gotta do is look around for a boat called the slice of light. If you see it, it's fucking sold. It's there. Fuck yeah. That would be crazy, bro. well, and if it's not, that's not like definitive. I mean, if they have one that's called a slice of pie or you know what I mean? Like I'll take I'll take something like could be a little tip, you know what I mean? Yeah. I'll take something like triangle of people. Yeah. A piece of existence. I don't care what the hell it says. You what I don't care. Yeah. As long as it kind of looks like keep something of the other. so Playing through the gameplay with just him, switches it to her, could be jealousy, could be everything else. Is what about the family aspect of it? Is there no like family like you don't got a mom you're trying to hide the fact you're a criminal? like in like in Grand Thotol's fire. Yeah. Yeah. No, I don't think so. Okay. so as as far as I know, Jason was is ex military and he's caught up in some, criminal things with his actual boss at the marina. And then when Lucia gets out of prison You pick her up and then she assumes into that that criminal underworld. I'm excited. So I'm I'm really I'm super fucking excited. We're gonna be able to be on Discord while we're doing this? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. we should I don't know, we should try and plan it to where we're experiencing it first together at at the end. You're not gonna do that. You're right, I'm not. I've got eleven hours of work before I can even hop on. And then I have fucking fourteen hours of editing, so I know I don't know what the takeaway is. All right, so if you don't touch the game until like eight o'clock. I'll still probably be working on the episode. I'll still probably be working on the and l last week? Last week I wasn't done until probably two AM. That was before technical difficulties. And that was before technical technical difficulties. This is three different fucking takes by the way. Today was a learn. Today was a lesson. Yep. And and it all boils down to superstition and why we should have been fucking more careful what we were talking about. No. As I quite literally said, you can't say, Let's have a big day. It was my fault. I said, Hey, bro, we won't even be here till 1 a.m. Yeah, it is now 104. Take the blame. Thanks, Dad. This is me. This is me. Thanks. This is me. No, I think it's gonna be a fun game. I I really, really am excited. So and I and I want to share that with everybody. So if you want glimpse into the live, still fat podcast. you guys can find us at boosted underscore Bubba. That's on all socials. because I am a PlayStation, you know, gamer, I don't actually do the streaming thing, but you'll hear the voice. You'll know it's me. Yeah. And so especially for the people that have PCs that can't have Grand Theft Auto Six that didn't want to go out and buy a console, they gotta wait a whole year. So you might as well come watch us and enjoy it, you know. Absolutely. like I said, I want to share that with everybody. So We are trying to get Boosted Bubba up to the thousand followers. And the best way to do that is for you guys to like, comment, share on these videos. So that way it comes up more in the algorithms for, TikTok. And I'm sure Twitch has something along the same route. but make sure you do that for whenever it comes to still fat pod. That's at Facebook, TikTok, Instagram, YouTube. All of them. So make sure you're liking, commenting, sharing all those. Keep the stories coming. Keep the answers coming back. Just so this podcast is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music, and now Audible. So anywhere you guys can find your podcast, we're there. So don't forget to tune in next week where we're gonna try real fucking hard to get it out. Hopefully we won't talk too much about the pre-release of Grand Theft Auto Six, but hey, no promises. Thanks for joining us and welcome to the Fat Pack. Love you. Love you.