Angela Kezar: Hello and welcome back to Worthwhile. I am so glad to have you here. Thank you for joining me. This week I have been facing a tough situation. I made an honest mistake, but it was hugely impactful to our family and would be a problem if I couldn't resolve it. To resolve it though, was going to take someone who would hear me out, believe me enough to look into my story and then have the heart to give me the benefit of the doubt when by the rules they could have refused to give my case any attention. All of this has reminded me of a few spiritual and parenting takeaways and I thought no better time to share them than now while it's fresh on my mind. The first takeaway, the first one is that the Lord cares for us, protects us and never leaves us. So many times this week reading through the Psalms, specifically Psalm 124 and 147, I was reassured of all of the times I've fretted or been unsure how things would work out. And the Lord has never left my side. He has at every turn cared for us, provided for us and brought peace through all sorts of difficult situations. And that's not to say it was always easy or in my control or went the way that I expected. There have been so many times that just as I thought all hope was lost on something, the Lord provides a way through. given another hurdle to overcome this week, I was faced with wanting to have it in my control and realizing it wasn't and that it is even better for my growth and faith that it wasn't. Now, some of it was my mistake in the first place that got me there and it took perseverance. ⁓ to resolve it, but I was confident that even if I couldn't fix this, the Lord would not leave me stranded. He would provide a way through. My husband and all of his steadiness and kindness reassured me of this in the way he received all my worries and his study resolve and and really just walking me through remembering that it is OK. We are finite humans who make mistakes and and God guides us through really challenging times over and over and over again. ⁓ through things that we feel are difficult. this week was of remembering that is with us in ⁓ all of our trials, all of the things. And we can be comforted knowing that even when we don't have the end clearly in sight, ⁓ we can and ought to be walking faith and the promises that ⁓ he will care for and provide for I'm reminded of the verses ⁓ that tell us to not fret about we will eat or what we will wear. ⁓ The Lord knows we need those things and He cares to provide them. His word tells us to look at the lilies of the field and the sparrows of the air. And are we not more valuable than they to Him? And yet He provides for us all. So whatever you may be facing, big or small, it can feel difficult. I urge you to be grown in your faith in the Lord. He will put us through these things that sometimes require walking only by faith, and we should thank him for those times, unknown though they may be, for growing us in our faith to the Lord. I also spent the week applying when I was going through so much to my parenting. I was in this difficult situation where I needed someone to be on my team. I needed someone to want to help, to believe that I had good intentions and to not only not brush me off, but to make a call in my benefit, not necessarily theirs. Early in the process, I was dealing with someone who was the opposite of this. She didn't seem at least to want to help. me make my case. She didn't seem to believe that the mistake was honest and she didn't give much attention or real care to the case I was trying to bring before her. How often as mothers with a bunch of little children with constant little problems, do we become just like that first lady? How often do I become the one who doesn't really want to hear it? Two children can come to me arguing over a toy, both talking over each other, both insisting they had it first and instead of listening, it's easy as a mom to say, I don't want to hear it. Neither of you gets the toy and then move on. And one of them can still be trying to say, but mom, wasn't. And we've already decided we didn't care how it happened. We just don't want to take the time to sort out their problem. Or we're in the middle of making dinner and there's a baby crying and we're watching the stove and a child comes to tell us what happened. And it's so easy to not even look at this. and just then stop arguing, I don't wanna hear about it right now, and maybe there are moments, and there are, where we truly can't stop. But what we've communicated through the way that we can sometimes handle these situations is that this isn't worth my attention. And that is so much not the mother that we should ever allow. Of course, you might be thinking, if I do this once, then I'll have to listen to every case these kids bring before me. And I just want to enforce clear rules. Wouldn't that be easier? And we tell ourselves that while reassuring ourselves that we're keeping order. And there is a balance there. There does need to be order and rules that give give us an answer. Who does get the toy at the end of the day? Someone has to or there might be a time we we laugh about it and call it that super busy time in the kitchen right before dinner. I'm sure we need to come up with a better a better name, but We just call it that super busy time. And my kids know that if they come to tell me a story and I'm in the heat of like getting all of the different dishes and things all off the stove at the same time, and there's like ovens opening and things, and I can just tell them, I'm in that time right now. So hold on to the story. I do wanna hear it, but I cannot stop right now. If I stop, everything will end. But all week as I worked through these things for myself, praying I would get into the right hands, I thought of the mother we should be instead of the cold rule enforcer, the one who does take the time to listen, to hear how the situation happened in the first place, to give the benefit that these little people didn't mean to end up in a bickering dispute about who had what first and how this whole thing is an exception to the no bickering rule. They feel their case is fair and needs a good listen with attention to the details and not just the ones that will make my case on why they broke the rules. I need to listen carefully to the details of how they ended up here. How can I help them not only through this little situation, but to understand where they did go wrong so that they can learn for next time. There is a way to go about all of that and it requires so much patience and tedious listening. But when we're in their shoes, that's exactly what we want. think that's has stuck with me the most this week is the Lord and his kindness never leaves us. ⁓ He provides way through difficulty, but he also gives us mothers a way to show that same kindness to our children every day, ⁓ to give our attention even when ⁓ we have work to do, the most important work that we can be doing. is helping and loving and serving our children. We of course need structure and rules and a huge kindness is requiring high standards and making sure our rules are just and fair. But we need to listen carefully and give attention to our children and all of their little troubles. It's an opportunity to be training, growing and helping our little ones learn to navigate their own difficulties. And every now and then there's an important little detail that shouldn't be missed. How much can we build up our children in their confidence and heart towards each other as we mercifully give ear to their concerns and put ourselves in their shoes, coach them, train them all after we've made sure that as their mom, they know that we're on their team. and we'll give them a good, fair listen and try to make the best for everyone. What a wonderful thing to build up in their character as we build it stronger in our own character. Okay, I thought today I'd try out a new little section on these episodes, at least the regular ones where I can share a recipe with you. Something we're cooking up in the kitchen these days. I'll try to post the recipe and the show notes, I think, or save it somewhere on Instagram, or maybe if you all want, we can do an email thing where I can let you know about new episodes and also drop in the recipe. Let me know if you'd like that. For today, this one's funny. I didn't actually get to try it all complete because my dog, bless him, ate it. while I stepped out to watch the kids do something outside. ⁓ he's ⁓ character for sure. ⁓ before he did that, I tried all of the parts and it seemed like a really delicious idea and it's beautiful. Like it's really a fun one to present at the table, like at dinner or even lunch for the kids or whatever, it's fun. ⁓ you take oranges, you cut off the peel, just like slice off the peel and the pith, but leave it a, leave it round and then slice it into rounds. So you just have these little orange disks, I guess, or any yummy citrus. You could do a grapefruit or caracara oranges or any of those. Then lay them on a plate, top those with little bite-sized scoops of avocado. And then I made a lemon vinaigrette and drizzled that with some olive oil over the whole thing. And it looked bright and springy and delicious. So I hope that you try that and add a a little bright cheerfulness to your table. Well, thank you so much for joining me today. Thank you for listening. And if you enjoy these episodes, a review or sharing with a friend helps this little podcast encourage more and more women. All right. That is all for today. I'm really glad you were here. I'll talk to you again soon.