scarlett: Hi guys, welcome back to Be So Real. It's Campbell and I. and we have a special guest. but first I really want to apologize to our good friend Joseph Bowman, who's probably watching. You are not the first guest on our podcast. And Joseph, if you're listening, we love you still, and We're sorry to disappoint you. One day, I promise. But we have our special friend here. Yes. Hi, I'm Ava. a junior at Baylor and got to meet Scarlett and Campbell like a week ago and they're awesome. I wish all of you could get to know them personally 'cause they're really great people. Ava's gonna ask us some questions. Hopefully you get to see our heart behind why we're here and a little bit more about us. maybe even our story, how we're friends. I don't know. Yeah. Whatever it shall be, whatever the Lord wants us to say. yeah, maybe I pray us into our conversation and then and then we get started. Yeah. Okay. yeah. Lord Thank you so much for just this opportunity to be with Ava. I pray for our listeners. I pray that you're able to speak to them, that they're able to get a glimpse of your heart. and how you've just loved us over the years, Lord. how have you've loved us in coming here, how you how have you loved us in our past, Lord, and your heart for your children. I pray that whoever's listening gets a g glimpse of that. Yeah. In the name we pray. Amen. Amen. Okay. I'm passing it over to Ava. Yeah, Ava gets to host this episode. Which is really cool, y'all. First podcast, and I'm already the host. So I think first my question is just like how just like walk me through like graduating high school, choosing to go to Pepperdine, like what did you think you wanted to do with your life? How did that change? Now you're going to seminary. Was that always the plan? Is that something that changed later? And then, like, how did you get to wake up seminary? Like, true it specifically, just like that journey and like how the Lord brought you. kind of a big long time but just generally like how have you seen that change and how has you seem like the Lord change your desires to be like his desires for your future? Yeah. Okay, yeah. I'm gonna tackle that into separate parts. But the first one being how did I get to Pepperdine? well I grew up in California and I actually never thought I was gonna go to Pepperdine. I honestly I applied to I think thirty schools in when I was in high school for college. I never thought I was gonna go to Pepperdine. My dream school was Duke. I didn't get in, and I think my heart was broken. And I was deciding between like Cal Poly and SGSU and I had just gotten into pepperdyn, but I really didn't know anything about it besides I had a lot of water polo friends in high school and I only knew about it because they would always go to camp there and they always wanted to go there and so I honestly applied because I just wanted to get in. which is not good. But that was it. but my mom was like w I really want you to tour. Like it's a Christian school and I had a few friends from my youth group that were going there and so I decided I was gonna get going to tour it but I had absolutely like my mind was set I was probably gonna go to SDSC or Cow Poly and I went and toured it and so funny going to Pepperdine like having like having gone to Pepperdine and knowing but I I walked onto the Pepperdine campus my first day and they were playing Awake My Soul worships worship music out loud on the speakers. and like inside internally I was like wow like this is really cool and I I just like felt like the Lord's presence and you could see the ocean and I was like wow this is really cool and I had grown up like going to Malibu like going to the beach but it just felt different but I wasn't gonna let my mom know like I was like no I still hate it here like I'm not gonna go here and I went through the whole orientation like no like I hate it here I'm not gonna go here and it's so funny because like that like that was the Lord and that was his intentionality because I've never heard worship played on the loudspeakers ever again in my before years going to Pepperdine. No I've no yeah, Campbell can attest. I've never heard them play worship music. I don't even I don't know where the loudspeakers are. We don't play music on campus. Yeah, like but the loudspeakers were playing like worship music in the morning. And I'm like, well, they were trying to get me to go there. But yeah, and so I like was still not like I'd gone through the whole day, like there was like this big com like commitment fair that you go to at the end of the orient like new student orientation not new student orientation, like admitted students' day for Pepperdine and I didn't commit. I went back home. it was probably like a few days before, like I think that the deadline's May 1st to commit to colleges. It was like that week, Wednesday night at my youth group, I was just worshipping and the Lord tells me to go up and talk to my friend that's going to Pepperdine, and don't even know why. But I walk up there and all of a sudden I start crying and I tell him I'm going to Pepperdine, and I didn't even know that I was going to say that. but this he's probably thinking I'm crazy. Like, why is she crying to me right now? But I just started crying and I said I was going to Pepperdine. And my mom walked over and she said you're going to Pepperdine, huh? And she just knew. And she said, like I it had to be your decision. It couldn't have been mine. The Lord told me you were going there, but I couldn't tell you that he told me that. And so I thought that was really cool. And then I go to Pepperdine. After that I had committed to Pepperdine. I was in a relationship at the time and he was going to SDSU and so that was a hard conversation to have about being like, yeah, I'm not gonna go to SDSU with you, like I'm gonna go to Pepperdine and like gonna make my own path. And but like I knew the Lord was calling me to get a Pepperdine and I go to Pepperdine in my freshman year, it's all exciting, and I'm really excited to like go meet people, meet people that love Jesus, and at the time like I think my freshman yourself would say that she loved Jesus, but like in James, like Faith Without Works is dead. by the way, guys, the cops are pulling up to the Christian frat party or something. That's so funny. Funny thing about Baylor, we live right across the street from the Christian fraternity that is throwing a Red Bull party right now, and and the cops are at the Red Bull party, and I think it's so funny. go to Pepperdine, I'm really excited, really expectant to meet all these people that love the Lord and really get involved in community. But at the time, yeah, like faith without works is dead. You could I could tell you that I love Jesus and I love the Lord, but none of my actions reflected that. Like I was in a tumultuous relationship. That's probably a strong word. But like yeah. That's probably a strong word. I hope you guys are really smart out there like yours. Tumultuous. Anyways, I just like I was not in a relationship that was bearing any fruit or edifying Christ. There we go. it wasn't bearing fruit, it wasn't edifying Christ. Christ was not at the center. I honestly, Christ wasn't even the focus. I think we would talk about God every once in a while, and we would both say we were believers, but lukewarm at best. and so we're like falling into sin in our relationship. It was getting really controlling and just toxic. It was in long like semi-long distance and like. he was joining a fry and I was joining s a sorority and we were just trying to please like be a freshman in college and please the people around us and yeah like it just wasn't reflecting Christ well and then I f I think like my freshman year I started to like get really dependent on the relationship, s like steer away from God. I wasn't really finding friends or community at Pepperdine in my freshman year. And so I was like, I'm not finding people here. I'm gonna be solely dependent on this relationship. And so I was like visiting San Diego and going to SDSU every weekend and just like making poor decisions. in my relationship, making poor decisions outside of my relationship, wasn't really going to church, wasn't really going like wasn't getting connected in community at Pepperdine. Even though it was available, like I knowing now that it was available, I just wasn't actively like putting myself out there to find to seek Jesus. Like I was not like the Lord was pursuing me and I was not pursuing him. And yeah, and so freshman year was really hard. I was thinking about transferring. I think our class at Pepperdine had one of the highest percentages of people that transferred. All my friends, like my roommate transferred, she was one of my best friends. All my other friends transferred, and so I was just kind of boxed and feeling like I had a transfer. But like in the back of my mind, I like, No, like the Lord placed me at Pepperdine, like I know he did. Like I know that he like he called me I had that moment and I and I knew the Lord was telling me that I needed to go to Pepperdine. And so something in me, like my summer before going into my sophomore year was like, no, like for some reason I feel like I need to stick it out. And I was I was going abroad, so at Pepperdine sophomore year, everyone goes abroad basically, besides Campbell, but you'll hear that in a second. But I think it's like eighty percent of the students. Yeah. Yeah, a big percentage. Eighty percent of the students go abroad. And yeah, and so I was going to I was doing a DC plus program where I went to DC. And did an internship. I did an internship at Congress for the first semester and the second semester I was studying abroad in Italy. But yeah, I was just like I didn't have good friends at Pepperdine. Honestly, I had some falling out with people too. And I think it just was like I was trying to hold on to my faith, but not really making decisions that edified Christ. And because I wasn't really treating people in a Christly way, yet kind of being judgmental and wanting them to live a life that like they didn't even like they weren't Christian, so I don't know. I was trying to hold them to a standard that I wasn't even holding myself to and so poor friendships that were like honestly like very poorly made a lot of my part. and yeah and so I I went into sophomore year and shout out to my sophomore year roommate Izzy Ku. I love her so much. but honestly yeah like and I mean this and I'm don't mean this slightly like I mean this with the weight that it deserves. Izzy Ku loves the Lord effortlessly. Like she pursues the Lord with such s like courage, strength and like diligence. And she's one of the like probably like her loving the Lord allowed her to love me well because of how much she loves the Lord and that's one of the biggest reasons that I stayed at Pepperdine. I met her my sophomore year and I was like, wow there are people that love the Lord here. Like I wanted to be a better person. I wanted to learn more about God because of Izzy Kuhn. And I got to read her book before we were roommates and just get a glimpse of what it's like to like actually pursue the Lord and not have any distractions. And so being her roommate is kind of what like made me realize like wow like I could find people at Pepperdyne that love the Lord. like the Lord has me here for a reason. And then I met really good people like in the DC program that love the Lord were hard workers. They made me wanted to do s like I was studying more than I've ever studied in my life because I was just around people that love the Lord and like wanted to pursue excellence. Like pursu pursue excellence for him. Like work hard because like he's told us to work hard. Like work hard because they love him. And so surrounded by people like that and I was like wow like pepperdine is is is pushing me like I'm growing and I think as I was growing I started to realize the things in my life that weren't in accordance with the Lord and that was a big thing in my relationship that I was still holding on to but I don't think I was ready yet to fully surrender that to the Lord and so I was kind of like my sophomore year I was going to church I was leading Bible studies I was like leading worship but I hadn't brought to the surface my sin in which I was still living in in my relationship. And I and I wasn't ready to let that go because it had been something that I held on to for two years or two and a half, almost three years at that point. Almost yeah, almost four years at that point. And so I wasn't ready to let that go. I wasn't ready to fully surrender to the Lord and I wasn't ready to make like the Lord my rock, like the Lord my foundation and not my relationship anymore. and so yeah, and so that was my time in DC and then I ended up going to Florence and I was on this like high of like this spiritual high of coming off of GC finding so many people that love the Lord and I was like okay I'm ready to go to Florence and I'm ready for the same thing to happen to me and I think it was a rude awakening. it's really hard going into an abroad program with people that had been there the whole year as a spring semester person going abroad and so I just found like people had already formed their groups. Everyone already made friendships. Me and my like good friend like we struggled to make community there. And also like there's a big going out culture. Like a lot of people are going to parties and drinking and I was just kinda like, okay, like who do I wanna be? Like am I gonna be the person that follows the Lord and pursues him or am I like going to pursue the world and like live in the world and like I was still in this relationship. I was still like living in the world and living in my sin in this relationship. And that I think that's just what I I decided to do for the semester and I wasn't pursuing the Lord and I kinda like f I started to r like regress. And fall back into my dependency patterns. The relationship was at my center. I wasn't making friends, so it was like the same thing. Like I wasn't making friends, I'm gonna lean on him. Like I feel alone, I'm gonna lean on him and not the Lord. And it just got to the breaking point where I told the Lord a few days before I was about to leave from abroad, like if this isn't this relationship isn't from you, take it away. I gotten to the point where I was like, I just couldn't do it anymore. A lot of bad things were happening, and I like you get to the point where wouldn't You're living in your sins so much that you start to realize you're living in your sins so much, and it's not giving you that feeling that it once gave you, like that that instant satisfac like satisfaction that it once gave you. and yeah, I think I hit my breaking point. I like I wasn't happy, I wasn't joyful, I wasn't content, and I cried out to the Lord and I was Lord, I can't do this. If this isn't for me, take it away from me, and that's what he did. He put things in front of me that showed me that my relationship wasn't godly and I was never gonna be led in it. and like I made mistakes and he had made mistakes too. And so ultimately like I ended up severing that relationship after four years and completely surrendering my life back to the Lord. And that was the first time of my whole entire life that I believe that the Lord was actually at the center of my life and and my life was for him and not for myself anymore. I think before I used to God when I wanted him and I prayed to him when I wanted to and I prayed to h prayed to him when I needed something. But this was the first time in my life after I had severed the relationship completely let go of I think that was the biggest thing that was holding me back from actually pursuing the Lord and wanting him to be at the center of my life and accepting his love. Was realizing that the love that I was allowing myself to have was not the love that I deserved. And there was a greater love that was available to me. And like that was Christ. Like that was knowing Jesus. And once I let go of that relationship, I started I realized the my worth that I had. I realized how much I was loved. I realized how much I was seen. And like Jesus has changed my life. He has allowed me to. accept more love than I ever thought I would be able to accept, have the capacity to love others more than I've ever been able to think and also like make myself think about myself less. I think I was a very selfish person for nineteen years of my life. And not to say that I I'm never selfish now, but I didn't realize how much my life was for myself before. I had let go of wanting to be in a relationship all the time and being in a relationship that was my replacement for God and not thinking that I was gonna be okay with without it and realizing like no, like God is contentment, like He is what makes me okay. I was never going to be okay in that relationship. I was never actually going to be content, I was never actually gonna be fulfilled, I was always gonna be searching for something more, and yeah, and so completely after abroad, after going to Florence, I completely Surrendered my life to Christ. And I like I knew him, I knew him my whole life, but that was the first point where I was like, no, like this is different. Like something's different, something's changed in me. it's it's more than a feeling. Like it was like my eyes were opened to what I have read my whole entire life, what I've seen my whole entire life. It was like the road to Damascus. Like I like Paul had heard, but like he hadn't actually seen, and that's what I like that was the same thing. Like I had heard all my life, but I hadn't actually s like seen and that was the first time like I'd seen and I've been following him truly, wholly, fully surrendered ever since and I hope to do that for the rest of my life. Okay. so wait, I need to log into my Instagram real quick. And find a DM from Scarlet. you slid up on my story before we were like friends. That's so funny. I was like, when is the first time I g I can remember an interaction with you? When did you decide to go off Instagram? Mike Campbell. I think that's so funny. There I sent her so much stuff. I decided to go off to Instagram this summer. I think it like when I was living alone and I was really in isolation and like struggling mentally with Just comparison and I mean like the enemy like surprise and isolation. We having this conversation earlier. I think that i Instagram is the biggest way where I'm able to to think that there's lack. I love some 23-1 where it's like in like the Lord's My Shepherd, in him I lack nothing. And that's so it's so true. Like when we have the Lord, we absolutely lack nothing. But I found myself seeing things that I didn't even know that I thought I didn't like that I thought I didn't have by having Instagram. and I just found myself comparing myself to myself, comparing myself to other people, comparing comparing myself to so many possessions that other people had. And I'm like, wait. I don't need the measure of happiness that I have to be dependent on someone else's happiness. and yeah, and so it was it was f it was more for myself and more to just lean on the Lord and and not place things in front of myself to see, to make myself think that there was something that I lacked. and 'cause there there just isn't. But we just believe lies so quickly and I feel like I was believing the lie that there's something that I lacked by by comparing myself and like even like just scrolling on Instagram. And just come like creating lists in my head of things that I thought that I needed when I'm realizing, wait, I actually don't need these things. This is this isn't really like I truly have all that I need. And I love NAW Tozer, he writes in The Pursuit of God, who talks about the story of Abraham and Isaac and how th the Lord wanted t Abraham to get to the point of realizing that Isaac was never his, that he was always the Lord. He was never gonna actually take away Isaac from him. When Chris talked about this, that was like blew my mind. Like concept I never thought. He's like he's never he was never gonna take away Isaac from him. And it's like the Lord never wanna never actually wants to try to like steal things from you or take things away. It's no like the enemy comes is still come and destroy it. Like the Lord's never trying to take things away from you, but he wants you to get to the point Where you're willing to like to give up the thing to realize that it's never yours to begin with. Like Isaac was always the Lord's. And he writes like Abraham, like that day and moving forward, will never use the word my and mine the same again. Like nothing we actually have is actually ours. And Instagram I think made me cl like cling and hold on and want to show everyone, like, look what I have. But I'm like, no, like I don't actually have any of those things. relationships, my friendships, the money I may have in my bank account, none of it is actually mine. And when we think that we're owed something and we think that something is ours, it becomes about us and it's it's not about us and it's never been about us. And so I think a big part of g r like of getting rid of Instagram, getting rid of social like social media was to be like, no, like nothing I have is actually mine. Like I have the Lord and in him in him I lack nothing. There's nothing I could gain or lose. Yeah. okay. Can they hear this? Awake my soul. That's this song. This is to Scarlet and I's friendship. And so that song, I posted a picture of me. I was on a plane. I was going somewhere for Christmas break. Yeah. And I thank God for the gift of intentional time with him on a plane to sit with him. And I posted about that. I was like, like, take time with God today. Like, I'm thanking him for the gift of travel and the gift of intentional time. And that's the song I had put on there. And this is December of 2024. And Scarlett slid up on this and goes, Love this song. Hope you're having an amazing break, love. And I responded with, Thanks, Scarlett, you too. Coffee next semester question mark. This is the semester right before we became friends. And this is the semester right before we became best friends. That's so funny. And I just thought of this, I was like, when? And I was like, wait, because when she slid up on that story, we weren't best friends and we didn't talk all that often. But we had just done Friday Night Lights at Amy and Danny Dewalt's house. So we had just Been in like a really like life-on-life discipleship class with each other, and would see each other like every Friday night, and I'd started to become friends. And when she slid up on my story, I was like, wow, like I think we might actually be friends. And then next semester we go on a retreat together with our student-led ministry, Greek IV. Shout out Greek IV, if you guys know what that is. And then we came back from that retreat and nobody sees one without the other. So okay, I'll tell you guys about how I got to Pepperdon. I'm from Kentucky, a super small rural town in Kentucky where pretty much nobody goes out of state for college or like moves away a whole lot. There, I mean there are definitely a couple people that moved away, but it's like a people stay there for their whole lives and people love it, and that's so awesome. And that just wasn't me in high school. And for the longest time I dreamed about going to Pepperdine. Pepperdine was my dream school. I wanted to move to Malibu, California for years. I grew up Church of Christ and Pepperdine is a Church of Christ school. And there's like there's one in Arkansas and there's one in Tennessee and a couple different places that like people go to that are nearby home. And then there's one Christian school on the coast of California and nobody ever goes there where I'm from. Why would you send your kid to California? And that was my dream school. and so summer before my senior year of high school, I apply to go to this church camp that they have there, and I get accepted, and I go and I spend nine days on Pepperdines campus worshiping with other students, meeting faculty and staff, doing Bible studies, serving in Hollywood. It was the coolest Mondays ever. And I remember calling my mom, like getting on the plane and being like I'm coming home to finish high school and then I'm moving back. Like I have to go to college here. And sure enough, I finish high school and I go to Pepperdine. And my parents moved me in. It was so cool. I've got family that lives like an hour and a half away in California. And so knowing that I was gonna be near my aunt and uncle and my cousins, like made my parents feel safe, like leaving me there, it being a Christian school, my parents are super excited about. And Pepperdine does this really cool thing during NSO where they like walk with the parents like separately than the students. The students go off and do their own thing and they do classes and things with the parents about like leaving your kid at college and navigating this. So my parents are feeling like Pepperdine has equipped them to leave me and equipped me to stay. and growing up, I grew up in the church. I would have said that I knew Jesus. I could recite to you any VBS story, any Bible story. and I knew like I only applied to Christian schools. I wanted to go to a Christian school. That was just kind of what was expected. That's just what people did. That's what I wanted to do. And then I get to Pepperdine and my parents leave me. And at the time, y'all, I was 17. I have a September birthday, so I'm really young. For my grade. And I'm 17. I'm across the country from my parents. I'm getting a taste of freedom for the first time, but also being at a Christian university. And so I'm walking with this. What can I try for the first time? What can I do? What can I get away with? My mom and dad aren't here. I'm the baby of my family. So I'm navigating, trying to become an adult, tasting things that I thought was natural for the world to offer. me things that the typical college experience I thought was normal going out all the time drinking boys like the whatever you would see in a movie about a sorority girl's life that was my freshman year like that was what I thought freshman year looked like and I was also going to church every Sunday teaching Sunday school like serving in the church while coming hungover, like to be quite honest with you guys. And I just be to be so to be so real. And I just thought that's what college was. Because the circle I'd surrounded myself with at pepperdine, that's what they were doing. The same people I was going to a frat party with on Friday night. We were also going to church together on a Sunday morning. And I just thought this is what college is. This is why I picked a Christian university so I can do both. 'Cause I didn't I didn't go to a state school because I didn't want to not go to church. But I just thought this was what college was. So for the majority of my first semester, I was definitely living one foot in, one foot out. And I did not see a problem with that at all. I thought this is just what college looked like. And remember my family, I told you that was the hour and half away. I loved my aunt. We were very close. And so I'm telling her my whole life story and how college is just, whoo, this grand old time. I'm having fun, I'm drinking, I'm partying. And she's a little taken aback because y'all is really honest with her. And she behind my back calls my dad, my dad's sister, calls my dad right before I get ready to go home for Christmas break. And is like, Campbell is not. who you think she is. And I think you deserve to know who your daughter really is. Because I'm worried. And I I don't know that this has happened at the moment. And then I'm getting ready to leave campus, like bags packed, and she texts me. I just want you to know before you leave for Christmas. I called your parents and we had a conversation because I think they deserve to know the truth. And because I love you and because I love your dad. And I remember feeling so defeated, so betrayed. Like, how could you do that? My parents don't understand me. Like I moved all the way across the country so that way I didn't have to tell them this, you know, whatever. And I remember calling my older brother. In tears, saying, What am I gonna do? Like, what how are mom and dad gonna react to this when I get home? Like, I I can't do this. And he was like, Yes, you can. I've walked through this before with mom and dad. Like they love you and this conversation will be so easy if you just be honest with them and you just talk with them. Like it's not that scary. And so I was like, okay, okay. I come home. All of Christmas break passed. Nothing has been brought up. And I'm like, right, I got out of this. But my parents aren't gonna say anything. Like maybe she maybe she didn't tell them. Maybe she was just telling me, you know, to calm me down. And it's like it's the week before I leave, like a couple days before, and I'm like getting ready to run out the door. I'm like trying not to be home that much. And my parents were like, hey, when you get back tonight, like we're gonna have a conversation, just about like expectations for like next semester and like you going back to school. And I'm like, okay, cool. Run out the door and I'm like going hang out with my friends and I'm like, stomach drops. And I just know when I walk back in that door when I get home tonight, like I'm gonna have to have a really hard conversation with my parents. So I come home, like I'm trying to stay out as late as possible. I'm like, what's when when do you want to have this conversation? What time are y'all going to bed, mom and dad? Like, how late can I stay out? And I'm trying to push it back. And I get home and starts off. They're like, so, like, how was your first semester of college? Like, be honest. Like, you know you can the the you know you can tell us anything. You know. And for the first time, I was like, I know I can tell you anything because one you already know, but two, like my brother's advice of like just speak to them. Like they're human. That was the first moment where I understood that like my parents are human and they're not superheroes and they're not perfect, and like I can tell them I'm struggling because they've struggled before. So I have an open, honest, vulnerable conversation with my parents of like, yeah, I do drink and I do party. And I'm also still going to church and I'm wrestling with that because part of me at the time was like, What's the problem? Like I didn't really feel super convicted about it. I knew other people thought I was doing something wrong, but I didn't see the issue yet. Like and so We had a really hard conversation, a messy conversation about what next semester was gonna look like and their expectations for me. and I walked away from that conversation a little hurt, but honestly so like thankful. That my aunt had called and told my parents because the trajectory of my story like shift started in that moment. Having that conversation with my parents and having to face my own, like, this isn't right and you know it. Yeah. And I was like, whoa. Because at the time, like I was 18 years old. And so I go back next semester and I'm like, okay, something's gotta give. I'm in a sorority. that's known for having a more of a like party reputation. And I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with that. And I was like, okay, so all my friends go to parties. And how do I stop without them judging me? Like how do I pull back but not make it weird about being like, I'm a Christian, I don't want to do that. Like I wasn't sure how to handle that. So next semester I go back and school looks a little different. But it's not completely changed. It's less frequent parties, but I'm still there. I'm not gonna drink, but I'm gonna hang out and stay out and do all the things. And I'm still gonna go to church and I'm gonna start plugging in and like meeting new people at church and going to a Bible study. And so it just started to get almost worse in a sense because I was so aware of what I was doing and why it was wrong. The first semester, no conviction. Second semester, every time I went, I know I'm not supposed to be here. I know like I know I should be doing X, Y, and Z. shouldn't be here. Or like my mom texting me, is this the right decision? Mom has my location. She'd be like, Are you where you're supposed to be right now? And just knowing, I'm like, am I? Like, part of me, part of me didn't care that I was there. Then the next morning I'd go, I shouldn't have been there, you know. So I wrestled with that the next semester. And then I'd come home freshman after freshman year. And I love my hometown best friends. They're some of the most amazing, God-fearing people. And after spending a year away from them, we all get to meet up together and we're sharing about our college experiences. And that's when I realized that my college experience, what I thought was the regular, typical, normal college experience, didn't look like all of my best friends' college experience. And they were like, Yeah, we were like kinda worried for you. And they were like, You are so far away from all of us. And all the like normal typical things and we were like that transition was like not easy for you. But if you had asked me, I would have yeah, it was so easy. I found my people and like college was great. But from an outside perspective of people who loved me and people who loved God, they were like, That's not you. Yeah. Like that's like concerning. We were worried. Like you don't need to live like that. And so having my parents speak into me. And then people my own age, my best friends who've known me my whole life, speak into me. I was like, okay, so something's gonna be different. And I go back sophomore year and I'm like, okay, I'm done with that. And people started to catch the vibe. Like my friends were like, okay, Campbell's a little different. And she says no to parties and she doesn't go out and she's not drinking. She's not even like casually hanging out with us anymore. Like it's different. But I was so ashamed of my past that I didn't feel like I could plug in anywhere else yet. So I felt really lonely because I was like, okay, I'm the girl that used to be a big party girl. I can't I can't go and sit in those rooms of people who read their Bible every day and people who work for the Spiritual Life Department or people who are in that friend group. I can't go there. So I'm gonna sit in my dorm by myself and read my Bible. Because I I'm I just don't know if I can be their friend yet. Or that they want me. But I don't want to be with those people anymore because I just walked from that path. I know that's not right. But I was so isolated and alone. I think this is where the enemy really got to me. Sophomore year was so lonely trying to transition out of the world and into like becoming a follower of Christ, a true disciple. And I lacked community. And that made me want to transfer from Pepperdine. My dream school, the place I longed for and prayed for, the answered prayer that God gave me that I did not steward well caused me to be like, well, I can't do this. I'm gonna move home. I was getting ready to give it all up and walk away from Pepperdine because I felt lonely. I felt isolated. I had some bad friend group breakups in the midst of changing my whole lifestyle. And then I come home. For Christmas break, sophomore year. I'm having this conversation with my parents. I tell no one at Pepperdine. Because I was the girl that made moving to California her whole identity. I didn't want anyone at home to know I was struggling because then that would look like failure. And that I was the girl that made it out and I couldn't do it. I moved away, I got my dream and I couldn't do it. I wasn't strong enough. It was all about me. So I was like so afraid. So it only told like one of my friends from home and my parents that I was like filling out a transfer application to the UK and that I was I couldn't do pepperdine anymore. And I go home for Christmas break and they're like, if this is what you wanna do, like we support you, but we're not sure that this is actually what you wanna do. And so I'm wrestling the whole time I'm home, not knowing if I'm gonna go back or not. And the night before my flight, my mom comes in my room and she's like, Campbell, are you getting on that plane? And I was like, honestly, mom, I don't know. Like I my bags are packed, but I don't know if I can do it. And we get to the airport, things are going smoothly. My flight gets delayed. And I was like, Okay, God, like, what is going on? Because I am already on shaky ground about getting on this plane and going back to Pepperdine and now it's delayed. And then it gets canceled. My parents come back to the airport and pick me up. And I have one more night spending the night in my hometown before I go back. And I remember praying to God, saying, like, if this is the enemy trying to get me to not go, I need you to tell me if this is you saying don't go. I need to know. Like I am torn right now, God. And I wake up the next morning and I have this sense of peace about going back to Pepperdine. So I get on the plane a little un unsteady, but knowing that I'm supposed to go back. And spring semester sophomore year was one of the best semesters I have ever had. Got plugged into a student ministry. called Greek IV, which is for students in Greek life to pursue Jesus. So the very place where I lost myself ended up giving me the gift of friendship in Jesus. Like it completely restored my faith in Christ in the very place that I thought I lost him. It was the coolest ministry. And then fast forward to junior year, That's where I meet Scarlett on a retreat with that same student ministry. In different sororities, different freshman sophomore years, we finally meet intentionally where we connect in a place we don't have our phones on this retreat. And it's just like solo time with God and the community that came. And Scarlett and I really got to know each other's heart forgotten who we had been, who we had become at this point. And junior year was a life changing year at Pepperdine spiritually and relationally. And then that's how Scarlett and I met. Yeah. I think like something that Campbell said that I could attest to is I think like during her like like it's kinda funny that like we both had like our first two years of like hard and not producing fruit, living in the world, but just in different ways. Like I thought I was living a godly life. And like the person my freshman year self look like if like my like now post grad school, like post graduation yeah looking back at my freshman year self, I don't think she would have even even understood the life that I live now. Yeah. Like I don't even think that she could have seen or understood what that would even look like. Yeah. And like that just makes me like my heart break for her to like to be like, whoa, Scarl, like there was so much more. There was so much more the Lord had in store for you. There was so much more than what you thought love was. There was so much more what you thought friends than what you thought friendship was. And like I wish there was someone to tell me that my relationship wasn't godly, wasn't loving, like my friendships weren't godly, they weren't loving. And so to like have like your family, like and like like my family loved me and they like love but like the like my parents were like We we like you needed to learn for yourself. Like you like you weren't gonna listen to us. And that was true, like I wasn't gonna listen to anyone. If someone was gonna tell me that I wasn't living a godly life, I would have like you're wrong. Yeah. And I couldn't have I couldn't have pointed to you in scripture where I was wrong or anything, but I would be No, you're wrong. Like I didn't I didn't feel convicted. Yeah. I thought I like I would judge other people but not feel convicted for my own sin. And like like looking at the speck in there's an authologue in mine, like truly, like I didn't feel conviction for what I was doing and I thought I lived a godly life and And it was just pride. Like pride of me thinking that I was better than the next person. Yeah. And like I probably would have I probably would have judged you first. A thousand percent. Like Scarlett's like, I don't drink. Yeah. Like she didn't party like that refreshment. Like I did. So you would have looked at me and be my gosh, she's in the party crowd. But was I sinful in my relationship? And yeah, 100%. So it was like, okay, like what? Like it just didn't make sense, it didn't make sense. and it was just like really pride and wanting to hold on to what I thought. was true so much to where it didn't matter what anyone else said. Yeah. And like like lacking humility in all aspects, like I not being able to admit when I was wrong because of fear of like losing what I thought was holding me together when it was actually like the one thing that was like making me fall apart. but yeah, I think now like talking about like okay like yes we both like kind of find the Lord like end of our sophomore year. I like spend the summer like really pouring into my relationship with the Lord. kind of figuring out like okay like I'm single, I've never been single. I had been in a relationship since I was thirteen years old. Like I had not been single since I was thirteen. So my sophomore year of college was the first time I was ever single like in my life. And so like what is being single look like how to I I I started to learn the value of friendship. Like I had really never truly had friends because I'd always had a r boyfriend. Like I was always a girl that had a boyfriend. So I had like really good friends in high school that loved the Lord but It was always like different. Like my boyfriend was always the first person in my life. And so, like, learning the value of friendships, learning like Proverbs 27:17, like as I entrepreneurs, so does one friend sharpen another. Like, what did that mean? And Pepperdine truly like gave me friendships greater than I could ever realize. I have yeah, if if you ask me, like, how do you see the Lord most in your life? It's the people around me, it's my friends that love the Lord. Like that, that's what it is. Like, God's love is showing. Shown to me most through my friends around me that call me higher, that speak words of life into me, and just like sacrifice for me. Like I've never had friends that like I just grew up in a place where if you had a like if you if something happened like and you had falling out, you weren't friends anymore. And it was this big drama. It was like a big small town that I grew up in where everyone, yeah, like it's just like if you had these big friend breakups. So I like had gone through a bunch of friends going through high school, and like I still have I'm I'm close with my some of my two two best friends from high school, but I decided it's never used to like real friendships, especially God-centered friendships. And so I would say like the biggest thing that like I learned from my junior and senior year leading up to like where I am now was like what it means like to have people around you that are gonna call you higher and love you and bring joy into your life and teach you more about the Lord. And then I got plugged into Bible studies. Like Campbell and I went to the same Bible study, and then I was I learned the importance of scripture. Like I had grown up with a lot of Holy Spirit, a lot of grace, a lot of cheap grace, where you could do whatever you want and the Lord would forgive you. Like that was the culture that I lived in. Like everyone was really open about their sin and so open in the way that like it was almost accepted. And that like, yeah, like we're all sinners, like keep sinning. And like that's just so like so far from the truth. Like we are called to be in obedience to the Lord and to his scripture and to his word. And like the greatest form of love is obedience to him and like obedience to the word, obedience to scripture. And so I Like my junior senior year, I learned the importance of scripture. I learned like we learn more about him and his heart through his word, like through the Bible. I started to like prune things out of my life that I didn't know were so prevalent in gossip. I like like in James it also says in in Proverbs like life and death is in the power of the tongue. Like the things that you say have meaning. I grew up just saying whatever I wanted to say about anyone and and like saying people's names that should never have been even. Been in my mouth, and like no, like like the it it's and Jesus says the same mouth that praises the Lord also curses other people. Like like wow, like I'm praising the Lord with my mouth, but I'm also gonna speak poorly about someone that is created in the same image of the Lord that I've been created in, that in the same likeness that I've been created in. No, like I had never been more convinced in my life of gossiping than I than when I fully started my life to the Lord and my junior and senior year, and just realizing, wow. Like the things that I say about people matter. Like, I am talking about a child of the Lord. Like, I if I want to be treated as a daughter in Christ, I need to treat the people around me as if they're they are brothers, like my brothers and sisters in Christ. I want to only speak words that the Lord would speak about them that are truths from from the Bible, from scripture. And so I learned reverence for the Lord. I learned obedience. I learned to accept criticism. That was one of the biggest things that I've learned, like my junior or senior year. I didn't want people to tell. But now like Like I crave criticism. It talks about like in Proverbs 3, like the father corrects the ones that he loves, like he disciplines those that he loves. Like the people in your life that are truly loving you well are gonna correct you and call you higher. And so the mentors of my life that have called me out, called me higher, some of the best moments of my life. I truly I say this all the time, and the best moments of my life are the worst moments of my life. Because the worst moments of life are most likely gonna be the biggest lessons that you've learned. And so that falling out that I had in in Florence when I like ended that relationship. either caught in lies or caught in something that I said or realizing like I had needed to humble myself and lower myself in order for the Lord to be lifted by the things that I say. Like those are the best moments of my life because they're me realizing wow the things that you say that hit you have weight, the things that you do have weight. I want nothing but my whole entire life to reflect the Lord. One of my favorite Psalms is Psalm 1461 it says let all that I am praise the Lord. And like that's like what Pepperdine has taught me in my junior and senior year. I want everything that I am to praise the Lord. The things that I say, the interaction That I have with people, like the my my work ethic. I want everything that I am to praise the Lord. Everything is worship. Our conversation right now, like this is worship to him. Like you you like going on a walk, you going on a run, like like going to school, everything that you do can be worship. Like, I want to work hard in all that I do in order to praise him. Like, I want everything that I am to praise the Lord. And Pepper Dine taught me that through the joy of other people, through mentors, through my friendships, through relationships. yeah, that Pepperine truly taught me obedience and discipline and love and yeah, for that all that I am to praise the Lord. And that's a big reason why I'm here today. Yes. wow. I like almost can't even put into words what Pepperdine has given me. Wow. okay y'all, so pepperdine changed my life. In such a I'm sure everyone like their college experience changes their life. But Pepperdine is anointed, it is a city on a hill. I love to tell this story whenever I talk about Pepperdine. Not even just Pepperdine, but y'all, the city of Malibu, the founding family of the city of Malibu. They were Christians. And they said that this place, this city, would be a city on a hill that it would be set apart for kingdoms. Purpose. And then it's not shocking that Pepperdine University gets built there and they commission people to be sent out for their kingdom purpose. Pepperdine's all about equipping you for your purpose. and so I just think that is the coolest story that not just Pepperdine, but y'all the city of Malibu, the ground that you walk upon there is set apart for God. And I think that shows at the grocery store at the beach underwalk to class. Like that was so evident to me when the Lord opened my eyes to him being in everything. I couldn't unsee it. I couldn't unsee the joy on the child's face walking down the beach with his mom. The peace that people feel when they escape there. So many famous people go to Malibu. as a retreat, as a quietness outside of LA to escape their lifestyle. And they're like, it's so tranquil, it's so peaceful. No, that's the gift of the Holy Spirit. What you don't understand, the peace that you're feeling is not just an energy or a vibe. In Malibu, that land was set apart. That is the peace that surpasses all understanding. You want to call it whatever, I know that that's God. The peace that you feel in Malibu, that's God. It draws people in. It does it in its beauty and its vastness, you experience God there. And I think that's something that Pepperdine taught me is seeing God in everything. And my junior and senior year, I got Super involved with ministry things on campus, taking extra Bible classes for fun as a public relations major because I thought studying the Bible was really cool and it st I still think it's really cool, and that's why I'm going to seminary. but I had such a heart for doing life with people, discipleship, finding the girl in a room that felt like she didn't belong because of where she was last night. I found her and I said, hey, what's your name? Like let's know each other because I was once you. And do you need a ride to church on Sunday? Because I know an amazing place where people would love to meet you and God will be there too. That was my passion. Meeting people where they were at, understanding that there was a God that loves them, and that there was this cool thing called the Holy Spirit that was gonna be indwelling in you and walk with you every single day was your comforter, your advocate. Like he is so cool and wants to spend time with you every single day. That there's a peace offered to you 24-7, that there is a hand to hold. In anything. Like Scarlett was saying, she's really learned to read the Bible junior and senior year and the power of the word. I grew up with a family that loved the word, praise God. We didn't really talk about the Holy Spirit a lot. And my junior and senior year at Pepperdine, I discovered the power of the Holy Spirit and that personal connection. It was life-changing. And once you experience the power of the Holy Spirit, you are forever changed. And It's changed the way I walk with the Lord. He's literally my best friend, and I didn't know he could do that, y'all. Like, it's so cool. And he's given me this joy that surpasses any circumstance. Like, my hope is in Jesus, not a circumstance. Not where I am, not where my feet are planted, but where I know that my heart is rooted. And that was so cool to learn and walk out with other people in community who believe the same thing and were teaching me more and more day in and day out about how to do life with Jesus and learning that and teaching the next generation, that freshman girl that had an unstable relationship with the Lord and didn't know where she belonged in her faith. I'm like, hey, come as you are. Come hung over to church. I would love it actually. God would love it. He's gonna meet you there. He's gonna meet you in your mess and he won't leave you the same. And then you will be rescued from your mess and you meet someone else who's in a mess like yours and you get to do ministry. It's so cool. It's the coolest thing. God saves you and He sends you out to go meet the people who are once in your shoes. And that's what Pepperdine taught me. Pepperdine taught me to go find the me's in the world. Who are lost in sin and say, hey, I've been there and God rescued me. Do you have a story like that? And a lot of people you'll meet are like, hey, I have the beginning of that story. How do I get the end? And I'm like, let me tell you about my friend Jesus. That's how you get the end of this story. So that's my heart now, and that's what Pepperdine has given me. so obviously like you're totally different people than you were when you started college. And I can imagine that like okay, you both moved away from family when you went to Pepperdine and were like You know, struggling with all like, okay, where do I belong? Where are my friends? I'm in a new place. Who am I now that I'm separate from this identity that I've created in this place that I've lived my whole life? Yeah. And so now you're doing that again. Mm-hmm. And you're moving to a whole nother place that you've never been I feel like for me, like place like I have this idea of who I am at this place and what the Lord has done for me in this place, and that's so beautiful. And then he like takes you and like uproots you and puts you somewhere else and you're Still that person, but you're in a new place. and you grow, but you grow differently. And so now that you are kind of starting over, like what are things that you see in like the same way when you were a freshman in college, like trying to figure out where you belong, trying to figure out your relationship with Christ? Are there things that you feel like are similar in this season? even though you're four years later, four years more mature, yeah. Have seen the Lord work in your lives in so many ways. Like how are you handling that differently? yeah, I I mean like it's the same thing, like the Lord has called us here. I think we both have a heart for ministry in different ways and like mostly rooted from like our testimonies and our own stories. You could see like if you have if we end up answering like a why like we're here and like the stories. If we end up answering why we're here, you could see like our testimony. I get preachy. But like you could see like our testimony is embedded by into why like we're here. Like the Lord uses the brokenness, like he truly uses anything the enemy is like intended for evil and turns it to good and like we are here and our passion for ministry and our burdens that we carry mostly come from like the hurt like like the the goodness that he has taken out of the hurt from our testimonies and from our past. And so like I look at my freshman and yourself and like I knew that I was a pepperon for a reason. And so I look at my first year grad self and I'm like, the Lord has called me to Baylor for a reason. Like surely he will be there to hear he will be here too. Like he isn't like he is the same God. He's not just in Malibu. Like he is here too. He wasn't just in like Clovis where I grew up. Like he is in he was in Malibu too, and he's gonna be at Baylor too. Like he he's everywhere. and I was just like thinking about like Exodus thirty three right before we left Mali. And when Moses says Moses says to the Lord, You've been telling me, Take these people to the promised land, but you haven't told me whom you will send with me. You haven't told me I know you by you've told me I I know you by name, and I look favorably on you. If it is true that you look favorab favorably on me, let me know your ways so that my understanding more and fully continue to enjoy your favor and remember that this nation is your very people. And then the Lord replied, I will personally go with you, Moses, and I will give you rest. Everything will be fine for you. It's like Moses saying, Like, Lord, I don't want to go if you're not gonna be with me. with me. Yeah. And like that's like how I felt like leaving Malva. I Lord, I don't wanna go if you're not gonna be with me. And he's like no, like I like I will personally go with you. Like surely I will be there for you. And like that's what I felt like the Lord told me. Like told me like Scarlet, like surely I will be with you wherever you go. Like I'm not like I like he is not just in a place, like he is everywhere. Yeah. And reminding myself of that, like he's brought me here. Like there's people like that need Jesus here too. Yeah. and like if I could be a vessel, like that's that's all that matters. Like I'm here for a reason, like it is selfish me to stay comfortable in a place where I believe that the Lord has called me to go somewhere else. Like I like I like it is not my own way, like but his will be done. Like I cannot like if he's told me to go somewhere like I have to act in obedience and I know surely he will be there too. And like that's what I was just reminded of before coming here. Like I will personally go with you. Like Scarlet, I will personally go with you. Campbell, I will personally go with you. He's gonna be here. He's brought us here for a reason. Like we will see the fruit of that. Like even if it like our circumstance certain circ like our present circumstances may not feel like feel like that, this is the promise that he's given us. And the promise surpasses the f the present feeling that we may feel in this moment. Yeah. Like throughout the summer. I would like have a moment of fear about the next step. And in that moment of fear, like instantly there was like a moment of peace and like physical tangible my gosh I don't know about where what we're gonna do like where we're gonna live and then God answered that very quickly and then okay like I need a job and I'm like unsure a door opens and I get a job like It was so clear that the Lord was opening doors for me to be here. And I remember a phone call with my dad, because I was like, okay, I know I'm going to seminary and I know I'm gonna study the Bible. I'm not sure a clear direction of like, I don't see like a job title in front of me of what I'm doing this for. But I know that the Lord has called me there. You know, and my dad was like, the Lord has made it so clear that you're supposed to go to Waco, you cannot not go. Like at that point it would be like disobedient, unfaithful to the Lord to go to the place He had He was opening doors for me. Like I couldn't not go. And I was like, that's so true. Like it's okay to not have this like vision of like what life is gonna look like because the now, the next step, one foot in front of the other was Waco, and that's all I needed to know. And when it's time to take the next step, like it will be there. And so just reminding myself. that like in this moment God's gonna be here today and God's gonna be here tomorrow and like that is all that I need. I think back to the Lord's Prayer all the time, give us this day our daily bread and how important like what that means. Praying that prayer, like not my monthly provision, not my five-year plan. We love a three-year, five-year plan. Like it's so in the American fast-paced culture to have your whole life planned out. And while that's not necessarily a bad thing to be organized, like plan your life, but to hold that loosely and not be dead set on that. Give us our daily bread and to do one step at a time. Like I think I felt some shame about not having my like whole life together and and people would ask me like what are you going to seminary for? And I'm like, To study the Bible. Like quite frankly, like I know I'm called to ministry and I know I'm called to serve the next generation. And that's like as much as I can tell you right now. And I like, I don't have my life together. I don't have a clear answer of I'm gonna be a pastor or I'm gonna be this or I'm gonna run a non profit. Like I didn't have an answer. And I was like, Well, God actually you didn't You didn't tell me I had to have an answer. Like I'm looking to other people. Other people's perspective and like perception of me is making me feel like I need to give an answer. But like when I sat with the Lord, like you're not calling me to give an answer. I don't have to give you a a title of what I'm gonna be when I grow up. Like you've got that covered. You're not asking me to name that. Like you're not putting pressure on me to pick a career and stick with it for the next five years. Like That's something I'd placed on myself because of fear of what other people think of me. If I didn't have a beautiful answer to say, I graduated from this nice university, I'm going to grad school and I still don't know what I'm gonna be when I grow up. And that's okay. So Yeah. It just reminds me of like Psalm one nineteen and like your word is a lamp into my feet and a light into my path. Like he's not the light. I mean he is the light for our eyes, but like in that instant like instance it's like he is lighting the path for our feet to take the next step and it's like it's okay that you don't know what's at the end of the path. Yeah. Like he is lighting your next step and like you're doing it and being obedient and it's so cool to and fun to see. I love it. what are you like excited about? Like just anything, like wake up being like fun, cool older grad students for like college girls, like Churches, seminary, like what is just like something you're excited about. I just want to say one thing that I'm super excited about is TV Scroll it's roommate. Like we talked about how we were best friends in undergrad and we spent all this time together, but we've actually never lived together. that's so sweet. And there were seasons of undergrad where we tried to make that work and it didn't and that was okay and we we trusted the Lord in that, like okay, we're not gonna be roommates, but that doesn't shake our friendship, like And that was so true. It was such a blessing to not live together and still be best friends. And the way the Lord honored that. And now we get to be roommates here, which is so cool. And just like knowing like she's across the hall and we like say goodnight. And like I wake up in the morning and she's here. Like it's so cool. Like we get to live together and there's just so much joy in that. And like the Lord is gonna take us into deeper friendship in this season because we get to live together. And one thing that Scarlett and I really love to do is host people and invite people over. And before we would do that in different spaces or spaces that weren't completely the both of ours. And now we're like, this is a space that we've prayed for, that we have like spoken your word over, Lord. I've literally anointed this place with oil and prayed that anyone that would walk through the doors would know the name of Jesus and we giggle, but that's actually so serious. And prayed over this, worshipped in this space, for this to be a spot where people would know the name of Jesus and they could come as they are and they would feel his love. Like I just want people to know him. And if we're a vessel in that. like sign me up, that's the coolest opportunity. And us being roommates is a big piece of us serving Waco. And so that's one thing I'm really excited about. Yeah. I just I second so much. but yeah, I think yeah, I we Camel and I both had like a vision at the same time. One night we were at like a a prayer house, which is so cool. But it's like the Lord like filling this place. Filling our house. Filling it with like girls that like wanna know him more. Wanna be vulnerable. Wanna be real. Like that I think that's like the that night was literally like Yeah. To like come to fruition, just like I want people to have a conversation with us or like me like me or Campbell or like whoever and be able to be like, Wow, like I could be vulnerable, I could be honest and in the honesty we could call each other higher and all of it to just point back to the Lord and like his love for us and to like be obedient to him in that and so like I see this place being filled, I see his love being shared, I see people walking And the identity that he's called them into. And I see us just like life on life with all these people around us. And and girls of all ages too. Like I want to speak to the freshman that doesn't know what she wants to do with the rest of her life. The f the freshman girl that maybe in or freshman or sophomore girl or junior girl, whoever it is, or senior girl that like is in a poor relationship. Like I've been there. Yeah. Like there's so much more. There's a greater love that's available to you. Like, yes, you actually can lead the relationship. Yes, you actually are strong enough. to be with you and Jesus and Him alone because that is much more than being in a relationship that is taking away life from you. And like that that's like that's what I see like us filling this place, us being able to speak life into s like people around us and sharing the immense love that we feel from the Lord. Yeah. And like being a follower of God is fun. Yeah. Enjoy. Being with Jesus, like there's so much joy in that. And people who are afraid, like that's where I was like, okay, well I'm leaving this lifestyle, and like my life's about to be like boring. And I was like gonna be okay with that because I was like, okay, born with Jesus, like because I loved him and I felt so loved and seen. And then I was like, wait, this life's not boring? Like, what the heck? Like, that's so untrue. And just meeting people, I've had conversations with people who were like Okay, like how did you like how did you do that? Because I am like I still think like the life I'm walking in is fun and I'm like I promise you life on the other side is way more fun. And so yes, having honest conversations, having the messy talks, being a space of ministry, and coming over and if you just want to like eat ice cream and watch a movie, this space is for you too. Yeah. Or you wanna play a game or you wanna listen to music or you wanna do whatever you want, like this space is also for you and if you're having great day and you don't have a mess to burn today praise god yeah just have fun just be friends like yeah you don't have to have something wrong with you to talk about to confess if that's not where you're at today. Yeah. Like we still honor that and love you and want to be your friend. Yeah. There's a time for mourning, there's a time for dancing. Like we we love like like yeah. But actually though like we are we are meant to be joyous. Like not something doesn't always have to be wrong. Yeah. But I feel like we are we live in a like a culture in a society where there's always something wrong. Even as like Christians too, there's always something wrong. Like like I I am am one to say like I some like you know Paul writes in second Timothy, join with me in the suffering that it is to follow Christ Jesus. But like it doesn't always have to feel like suffering. Yeah. And it's okay that you don't have to be searching for the suffering and I and I feel like convicted of that all the time that I wow I'm searching for something to be wrong. Like, no it's okay if like things aren't wrong all the time. Yeah. And like you're allowed to be happy. And yeah, like I feel like we're so comfortable in the suffering that was sometimes we search for it. And it's okay to not do that. Yeah. Like bring your suffering if that's what you got. But person sitting next to you is having a horrible day and you're like, Well shoot, I can't say I'm having a good day. Like no, you can actually because Christians bear each other's burden and we rejoice when you rejoice when we mourn when you mourn. And that's the point of community, and that's the point of life and that's what we want this space to be. That's what we want our home to be. It's like we honor everyone's story wherever we're at when you walk through that door. okay, so it's called like be so real. And like clearly you're just you're so each one of you, like authentic and just like I can tell, like from the moment you like picked me up in your truck. Like the second I was with you, I just knew I was like, like Who I'm sitting with right now, like that's how they were before they picked me up and it's how they're gonna be after they picked me up. It's like, they're gonna be, you know, extra nice or different because they never you never met me. It's like you were just you and like immediately that came across. And so is that something you feel like you've learned in the last few years? How did you like learn to be like that? How did you let the like masks like fall off and like let the Lord remove those from you and just yeah. my brain does this thing where when someone asks me a question I immediately just think of a verse that answers the question. That's an awesome thing. I don't know the thing that my brain does is on the boy's girl. favorite verses and it's been like my key verse all summer. Well okay whatever it's Proverbs twenty seven nineteen and you asked one of my friends, I quote this like every day. but it's I love the NLT version of this too. As a face is reflected in water, so the heart reflects the real person. And that's my prayer every single day. Like may my heart reflect who I really am. And I think that I love that is in your actions and the thing that you say like like I I want to be this Same Scarlet to every single person, and the real Scarlet is the one that loves the Lord. And I learn more about myself by just loving him and the people around me learn more about me by just loving him. I think it's Augustine that writes, like, make it to the Lord that like the Lord that knows thyself more than I that know thyself. Like that's just so true. Like getting to know the Lord more in his heart is knowing myself more and like who Scarlet is. And so that's who I want to be to every single person that I encounter. And I want them to know it's like sometimes I turn my brain off and I say the most mindless things that make absolutely no sense. Like that's how the Lord created me and and and I'm like and like I'm okay with that and I stand by that like like we don't have to be serious all the time. I'm not the most serious person ever. Sometimes I say things that make absolutely no sense. And and like and that's okay and like I like to sing I like to be goofy and low key I'm kind of weird. Yeah and I'm okay with that. but like I want my heart to Reflect who I really am, and I want that to be someone that loves the Lord effortlessly. I want to love the Lord every single day. I want to wake up and choose Him. I want to wake up and choose Him and choose the people around me. I want my friends and my family and the stranger that I meet on the street to know that there's something a bit different about me, and it's because I love the Lord with all that I am, and that's what truly matters. And may my whole life just be a reflection of how much I love the Lord, and may that reflect who I really am. And so, yeah, I have to be the same person to every single person because I want to only be the person. Person that just loves the Lord. Yeah. Yeah. I think learning to be authentic started with well, who is Campbell? Like when I started taking my relationship with God like seriously, and when I understood the weight of a lifestyle with Jesus and how awesome it is to be His child, his daughter. Like words like that became super important to me. His daughter. His child. Like who is Campbell? So before I had this other lifestyle, and now I'm walking with God, rediscovering who I am as his creation, not Campbell on earth. Like who am I spiritually? Who am I that he knit me in my mother's womb? He is my creator. He knows me more than I know myself. And being with people who know God on an intimate level, who can speak those things into you and are like I see this in you. I see compassion in you. I see leadership in you. I see drive. Like I see gentleness. I see kindness speaking life into you, things that are of God and of scripture, things that are true of you, and letting that sit in your heart and know you have to believe that. Like when someone tells you things that are of God, of your character, like I just sit there and be like, wow, is that true of me? Like, do I believe that? You know, and letting that rest over me and a lot of prayer asking God, who do you say that I am? And then when you are confident in who Christ is, you're then confident in who he says you are, and that's who you want to be, anywhere you go, to anybody that you're talking to, and like be unashamed and unoffendable and unembarrassable. Like we're so Unembarrassable. We we laugh in public. We do whatever like we're so silly. We're loud. Like literally Yesterday at orientation, they're like, Would you guys be filmed in a clip for social media? And we're like, we don't care. And he was like, wow. we're like, we're just gonna be ourselves. And if you want to record it, like that's cool. Like, we don't care. and I think that's something that like really is important to being authentic, is when you're being yourself, you're honoring who God Created and you're honoring him in that. So if you're not being yourself, it's like, well, you're not being who God created you to be. You're walking away from the things that God has given you to act in. Like, we're not shy. God did not give us a spirit of fear. Like I think it's Second Timothy one seven. Like he g he did not give us a spirit of timidity. That's just not from him. And so when we want to be behind closed doors and not ourself, like that's not of the Lord. And I think sometimes, especially growing up, the words that are spoken over you hold so much weight and we tell kids, she's just shy or someone's being a lot, you know, calm down, like don't do that. And it wasn't anything bad. Like the words that you speak over kids matter and I think the words even now, the words that you speak over yourselves or your friends, your family members, like especially the words that you speak to yourself, y'all. Like treat yourself with kindness and speak words that God would speak over you. Because the words you speak matter. And I think that's how you become authentic. And how you s be your authentic self all the time is what you say about yourself. what you believe about yourself and what you believe about God. So What are Some things that you feel like the Lord is just like teaching to you like now. Like even if it's just like today, like what are like some themes you're seeing that the Lord is just bringing up and it's like, okay, this is what I'm currently learning and walking through and just going what you're hearing from him, like through the word, through his spirit, through prayer and just all those things. well I think the Lord's really teaching me patience. Yeah, I like I touched on earlier, like I wanna have this plan and he's teaching me like it's okay to go one step at a time. when I pray with God, I get this vision of me and him walking on the beach and I'm a little girl, like my hair's in pigtails, little girl. And I'm so little that like when I'm we're holding hands, my hand is like up reaching towards his. His is down reaching towards me. Like he's so much taller than me, bigger than me, greater than me, stronger than me. Then my hand has to reach up to his to hold it. We're not on the same level to stick out my hand and hold it. I'm a little girl and he's a step in front. And we're just walking, holding hands one step at a time. And it's a vision I get frequently in prayer when I know that like the Spirit of God is with me in this decision, or the Spirit of God is with me in like in this moment when I'm feeling whatever it is. And when I think about my future. And things get overwhelming, it's like patience, one step at a time. I'm holding your hand. And I'm reaching out in dependence as a little child to God. And he's got me. And I'm getting here and it's starting to get exciting. Things are happening. School is starting. I can see like, and they're talking about this ministry avenue and like there's a job for this church and there's all this. And I'm like, yeah, and I wanna I wanna get back up and race again and think, okay, I'm gonna do all this. And I start mapping my own steps again. And he's like, no, right, remind where we just came from. Rem remember Campbell, where are you? Like, right, wait, I am in step with you, God. I'm one one step at a time with you. I think he's teaching me patience in this season of like just walk one step with me. Let's do a slower pace of life here. Intimacy. And then you can take your next steps, but s take your first step with me. Yeah. So that's why I'm learning. I think that I'm so like yeah, kinda like Campbell saying impatient and like yeah like the Lord brought me here. I wanna see everything right away. Okay, Lord buy my here. Show me it all. And I'm like, wait, no, I need to like take a step back, pause. this summer I think I the Lord is really teaching me to be alone and like what it means to be alone with him and not letting the enemy get a hold of my thoughts, and surrendering my thoughts to him. Too and and only thinking of things that are like of the Lord and not myself. And so I think the what the Lord's teaching me the most in this is in the proverbs says, like, may I have eyes to see and ears to hear you, Lord. And I think that's what it is. Like the Lord is here, and I think I'm so quick to shut my eyes and close my ears and not listen to him and not want to see him here. Be I don't see it right away, he's not here. I'm gonna I'm gonna not listen and I'm not gonna see, and I'm just gonna like be upset. Or yeah, just like be upset and be nope, like like I'm mad that. Why am I here? but like in everything he's there, like he is always around. And so he's been really teaching me, like, have the eyes to see and like the little things. Like if you look, he's there. If you listen, like he's taught he's speaking. And so if I'm at work, like how are you here, Lord? Like, show me. Like, I want to see you. And he and he's shown up and like he's just teaching me, like, like I have to be willing. Like he's always pursuing me. Like, I have to like soon too. Like I can't have to like stop running away. Like I like I I have to stop running. I have to just let him show me the things that he has in store for me here. And if that means like being me and him alone for a while, like that's okay too. But being okay with like stopping and not wanting to fully be in control and wanting things to happen in my own timing and wanting to see things right away, wanting to like have an overabundance of feeling. I think sometimes I chase feeling. Like that's that's not real. Like the Lord is here and I don't have to feel an overabundance of happiness for him to be here. No, like it's like joy joy is greater than happiness. And like I am joyful in being here and he's brought me here for a reason. May I have the eyes to see him in the ears. To hear him? Yeah. what does your time with the Lord look like? Like I know you talked about like praying and just obviously you read the word a lot, but like for you individually, like what does like time, like with the Father look like? Daily, weekly, like what are like rhythms for y'all? Yeah. Yeah, I think like it looks different in different seasons. Something that I've embedded in the past like year that's really like changed my life was reading a psalm and a proverb of a day. and like the the proverbs have so much wisdom and I find myself reading them over and over again every month and it's learning something new every time. And like right now I'm going through the book of Hebrews. But it it's honest, like the psalm a day and the proverbs of the day has changed my life. I learned so much wisdom and it's they're so convicting. They're just so easily convicting. I'm like what like like like in the Proverbs 3 says like write like store these commands in your heart like write them deep in your heart let them penetrate you like am I approaching the scripture and letting it penetrate my heart penetrate my heart in a way that when I'm walking my day-to-day life they'll it'll come back up the things that I do will be reminded of the scripture that I read and so praying before I approach scripture that's like having a Hebrew score mindset that the scripture is alive and breathing. Like the Lord is going to speak to me through like He is always speaking and He will speak to me through my reading. So posturing my heart to accept and receive before I read has been a big thing. Like trying to read first thing in the morning and spending t alone time with the Lord. I also just like to read in general. I I like theology books. I'm reading The Pursuit of God right now by Tozer which is really cool because I that was the first book I ever read when I accepted Christ. And it's so funny reading it now and and being like, wow, I know junior year Scarlet did not know what this was saying, but like reading it now, like, wow, my eyes have been opened. I I feel like I meet him so much in just philosophy and theology and and doctrine and then also I love worship like so much. I think that like I'll see a psalm as I'll see scripture and it'll become a song in my head. And that's been such a great way that I've been able to connect with the Lord is just worshiping. And then recently like running to like I clear my like it clears my head. He talks to me. It like shows me endurance and strength in a different way that I've never seen before and like perseverance. And giving me a heart to understand, like we can do hard things. And I think the Lord has revealed himself, and like I meet him a lot through that too. And also laughter, that's that's the most random one. I think I meet the Lord most when I hear people around me laughing, and it just shows like the joy that comes in knowing him and also his how much he loves his creation. That like we get to laugh, like we get to be joyous, and it's like the people like you I I s like I find myself being able to love his creation more and more and more and more and see people. people more in the eyes of the Lord when I'm able to see like joy and laughter. Mm-hmm. the older I get, the more like grandma I become in a sense, like I love an early bedtime, which does not hold true for tonight, but it's late, y'all I know. but I love an early bedtime and I love to wake up early in the morning and be like alone. Like wake up before the house mindset, like Proverbs 31 like. But genuinely, like to wake up and be alone with God first thing in the morning before I see anyone else, before I speak to anyone else, before anyone else's thoughts have influenced my mind, before I pick up my phone. And be in the word and be in prayer. I journal my prayers and that has been such a gift for me to look back on and have a tangible like, whoa God, these are the things I ask, these are things I brought on your behalf of our other people. Like this is what you put on my heart this many months ago. And I'm going back and reading these things, which is so cool to see the progress that's been made on those or how they've been answered or how I'm still waiting and what that looks like. So that's really cool. and And then recently I've really loved cooking in a different sense of like honoring what goes in my body. Like growing up, that was never like an emphasis for me. And then I think like sometimes it's like easier to eat healthy in California because that's just like what's pushed there. but then like living on my own out here and understanding like wait, I want to honor God with like what I'm eating, what ingredients I'm putting in my body, and like not to be obsessed. Obsessive over that and like also eat ice cream like hello guys we literally went and got Freyo tonight. So like all that to say, but just like I find a lot of joy and a lot of like personal like closeness with God when I'm like cooking or going to the grocery store, and like in the craziest thing, reading food labels. I don't know, guys. Maybe I'm just my frontal lobe is developing, but I think it's a lot of fun, and I find a lot of joy in honoring God of like okay, well, like you've given us good ingredients, you're giving us things that make me feel my best you've provided these things and how can I honor you in what I'm doing when I'm eating as much as that sounds like not a ministry but I think it is in the way that I worship God is right now in this season I'm learning like what to eat what to cook what he what he wants for me so it's kind of fun. Okay, just last like little thing, just if there's any advice you have, just like first couple of things you think of, like don't think too much about it. But any advice you have just for people in transitions, people who are growing in their faith, just yeah. Your things you wish you knew, I don't know, a couple of years ago. Yeah, don't be afraid to make mistakes. I think what I see the most for people around me is like we're we're afraid to make mistakes, we're afraid to mess up, we're afraid to make the wrong thing. Like what if this is not what the Lord had in store for me? like so many mentors have told me like you're they're only like ever sixty percent sure that this is actually what the Lord has in store for them. Like it's okay if you're not sure, like make mistakes. love prospers when a fault is forgiven. I love that proverb. Love prospers when a fault is forgiven. Like we are called to forgive one another. make mistakes we are able to to place Christ at the rightful seat like on the throne when we accept that we are wrong. And he is always right. Like make mistakes. Don't be too hard on yourself. Extend grace for yourself. I feel like I'm so often more than not hard on myself, but I think the most the biggest thing I'll tell people be like don't be afraid to make mistakes 'cause like there's so much growth in that and there's much love that can be learned in making mistakes That's really good advice. And what I'm about to say is kind of the opposite. But something that's really stuck with me ever since I heard it was you can learn through wisdom or regret. Both are really good teachers, and only one is really painful. And I look back at decisions I've made where if I had asked a friend for advice, if I'd gone to the word first, if I had learned from someone else who was speaking life into me of hey, I've been there, I've made that mistake, don't do it, and listened, I could have saved myself a lot of regret. but regret's a really good teacher. Like, boy, have I learned Some great lessons from regret, but I could have learned them from wisdom and saved a lot of heartbreak. and so I say that to a lot of younger girls and I mentor them that hey, they will both teach you and you'll learn amazing lessons as you grow up. And the Lord is in both of those. But regret, really painful teacher, wisdom, really amazing teacher, way less painful. I think that I think I meant I'm like I more meant like risks, less mistakes. I I I understand what you mean. But to to to a listener of like make mistakes, it's okay. And I'm like, yes, and reg Wait, yeah. I didn't mean mistakes as in like disobedience. I meant mistakes as in like don't be afraid to take a risk that you feel like the Lord is calling you to out of fear of it being the wrong decision. Yeah. In like in what you think he may or may not be calling you to. Like you don't have to be a hundred percent sure to take a step with in a leap of faith with the faith with the Lord. And I think that's what I meant by make mistakes is yeah take risks n like and don't you don't need to be a hundred percent sure that this is exactly what he has in store for you. Like take a leap of faith and have enough trust that he's gonna guide you wherever you end up. Yeah. It's like leap of faith is like an oxymoron. Like it literally wouldn't be faith if you were sure of it. Like that's the whole point. And that's the whole point of faith that you don't have to be 100% sure. Us being here, like we are not a hundred percent sure this is exactly what you're supposed to do. But we took a risk in knowing that the Lord is gonna be with us no matter where we are. I think so many people are trapped in their own mind and afraid to do things and living example said it's okay if you don't 100% know if the Lord if you feel like the Lord's calling you somewhere take that risk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Yay! We thank you so much, Ava, for everyone. Thank Ava for being here. Woo! Applause. Yeah. Honor We we just honor your heart of obedience, Ava, and the way that you've influenced us. Like y'all, next episode in the future, an episode in the future, we're definitely gonna be interviewing Ava because she's the coolest person ever. Ava was the first real friend we made here. And we walked away from the our our hangout with Ava and we were like, we wanna be her friend. At the end of our first hangout, she was like, Love you bye. And we were like, Love you bye. And we were like, That's a friend. Like that immediately, like, that's a Christ-centered friendship right there. The difference was so evident. And we were like, We wanna be her friend. Like that's we knew that was real and we knew that was that was something from God. So thank you. love to everybody listening to this podcast. XOXO. Be so real. Be so real bye.