Ishmael LaBiosa: Today we end our series, All of Christ Over All of Life. And a big part of this series, a main idea of this series is that Christ is Lord over all. Yes and amen. But Christ has given authority to different people in different places. And that those to whom he has given authority and responsibility. We are to carry out the authority and responsibility that we have been given, listen carefully, in the different spheres of life. the Christian home, we are to have responsibility ⁓ and are to be obedient to Christ's commands. In the wider society, in the workplace, we have instructions that have been given to us by God. And so this is what I'm hoping since the series is ending and today the Bible gets into rather granular detail. It begins to give very specific instructions to very specific people saying this is how you live out Christ's Lordship in many areas of life. This is what I hope. I just think about myself? I am a husband. I am a father, I'm a pastor, I'm a citizen. I have responsibilities to the wider community and society and in every one of those areas I've been given unique instruction by God and I need to carry that instruction out wisely, faithfully so that Christ can be all in all in my life in every place. That's the point of the series. That's the message. of the letter to the Colossians and I hope we hear it. Four areas today where the Apostle Paul probably gives instructions that are so specific that we wish they were a little less specific because these texts that I will read have been debated, they have been reinterpreted and what I'm going to try to do today is cut the path straight. If you have a Bible Colossians Chapter 3 verse 18, we finish the book to chapter 4 verse 18. The first big idea today is this, to put Christ over all of life, Christ should be honored in our homes. Four packed verses here, verse 18, wives be submissive to your own husbands as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands love your wives and don't become bitter against them. Children obey your parents in everything for this is pleasing in the Lord's fathers do not exasperate your children so they won't become discouraged Before we give commentary on what it means. Why don't we just see it clearly for what it says? Wives are given unique instruction to live out the mandates of a Christian home the clear language here wise be submissive to your husbands. What does submission mean in this text? A voluntary ordering under the authority of your husband. You know, I have done more marriage counseling than I thought I would as a pastor, and I've seen the joys and I've seen the difficulties of marriage. I remember there's a very elderly lady who came to see me one time. I don't meet with young ladies alone, but if you're old enough to be my mother or grandmother, I'll see you in She said, I wanted to come see you. I said, fine. I'll never forget she came, she sat down in my office and I said, how can I help you? And she says, I've been married and divorced six times. And then she would literally, I remember this, she would say that, she would hug herself and cry. And I remember saying, well, let's just hear about these six marriages. And so I do what I often do, to make a history. know, see, when did it happen and who was his name? And I remember when she finished with the history, I said, ma'am, you haven't married six men. She says, I haven't. I said, you married the same man six times. I said, you just repeated history and repeated history. You gave him different names, but he treated you all the same. You know, it's interesting. don't, ⁓ nobody forces anybody to get married in America. You notice this? You go out and you pick them. And it's, it's odd to me. I've heard so many. and I'm negative on women today. They say, I am not gonna be submissive to my husband. And I'm thinking, why in the world would you marry a guy that you couldn't follow? You know, I'm just thinking. I mean, I can think of plenty of people, not that I'm getting married to them, but I think enough of them, because they're a decent enough person that if they said, I think we're gonna do this, and they could hear me out, I'd have no problem going along with them. Do you understand this? So if you're thinking about getting married ladies, why would you marry a guy you don't want to follow? I mean, does that make any sense to anybody? And so you say, well, I didn't know what I was getting into. Well, here's the reality. You didn't get into it and you chose it. And so the goal is in that context to try to live up to the ideals of the Bible as you can. And notice this is not an unfettered submission. It says here in the text, be submissive to your husband as is fitting to the Lord. If a Christian wife in a marriage is asked to do something by her husband that is out of bounds, is as fitting and it is not as fitting to the Lord, the wife is not under an obligation to follow in. those contexts. Let's talk about husbands. Verse 19 is amazing. There's this much commentary with so few words. Husbands love your wives. It's a very odd thing to be, I mean, again, if you get married to her, why in the world would we have to be commanded to love her? You know, why would you get married to a woman you don't naturally love, although that seems to happen? I think the reason that the command of love is here is because this isn't just any old type of love. This is a Christ-like love. This is a sacrificial love. This is not, love her because she is wonderful to me. I love her as Christ loved me. And that is underneath all of this. Now here's the deal. While there are differences between males and females, it's odd that we've had to be reminded of that. There's also tendencies among males and females and a tendency among men is to be harsh. Or as this translation says, to become bitter. And so a Christian man is actually to be known for his love for his wife and his ability not to become embittered. The idea underneath this is not to become harsh. That you might be tough with everybody else. but you ought to be nice to your wife. Then children, children obey your parents in everything for this is pleasing in the Lord. I feel like as children are in the home, they have the responsibility of obedience. When children are outside the home, they have the responsibility to honor their father and mother as one of the commands tells us. And so if you're a child and you're still in the home, especially As you get a little older, you begin to figure out that your parents aren't perfect. Welcome to the human race. And listen, as a child, it's never going to be a badge of honor that you are a disobedient child. Never. I mean, my dad is in the grave, and I'm thrilled that through his entire life with me, I didn't give him a hard time. that he would say of me, I'm not blowing myself up here, it's just something I could do nothing about now had it not been this way. Do you understand what I'm saying? And, you know, as he is dying and we're talking, he said, you know, I appreciate that you didn't give me trouble. Let me tell you something, children, no matter what age you are, still under the home, it's never going to be a badge of honor to be wild and rebellious. to give your parents a hard time, because here's the deal, your parents are doing the best they can. I can promise you that. And so children, obey your parents in everything, for this is pleasing unto the Lord. Now once again, if mom and dad were to give you commands that are outside the scope of what Christ commands, then you're not under obligation to be obedient to them. But if they are within Christ's commands, just because you might not like them doesn't mean you can disobey them. And then lastly, instructions are given to fathers. Christianity, fathers are viewed as head of household. Fathers do not exasperate your children so they won't become discouraged. Dad set the tone for the house. And now having two boys of my own, I realize maybe in an up close and personal way how vulnerable children are. The smallest of things can knock them off course. The lack of rules can be a problem. The lack of love can be a problem. And dad, you particularly, but mom too, are not to exasperate your children so that they become discouraged, that your house ought to make sense enough to the child. There have been times, know, Melissa and I are doing the best we can, and little Thomas will say, dad, I just don't know what you're saying. And if I don't listen, that my six-year-old doesn't know what I'm saying, that to the degree that he understands it, and to the degree that he understands what I expect and the love that we give, is to the degree to which he won't be exasperated by me. This is actually very important, that we set a tone in the house for flourishing. Now it's been, I'm kind of, I'm not old yet, but I've heard enough of people trying to make these texts say something they don't mean. The texts mean what they say. Wives submit to your husband, husbands love your wife, children obey your parents, fathers don't exasperate your children. There's no level of mental gymnastics you can go through for them not to mean what they say. Now this is the deal. You don't have to follow the model of a Christian home. Nobody's going to grab you in a headlock in the parking lot and say, you must do this. You must do this. I think you should do this. I think you this is right and good. But let's just be honest with the text and say, this is what it means. You say, why is there so much wrestling in this area? There's so much wrestling in this area because the culture has fundamentally redefined marriage. Now we talk about redefinition of marriage in other spheres. But we have redefined marriage between a man and a woman in this way. I see it almost every two or three months. It comes in my office in the form of premarital counseling. Marriage is no longer seen as a covenant before God to fulfill the mandates of Christ as husband loves wife and wife submits to husband. That's not, not, that's the American ethos right now. is marriage is an expression of my individuality. And that expressive marriage, that marriage is first and foremost in the minds of many Americans about romantic love, which I'm not against, okay, and emotional companionship. And this is what most Americans believe, that marriage exists primarily to make me happy, fulfilled, and affirmed in my identity. Well, that might be what Americans believe, but that's not what the Bible teaches. God doesn't want you to hate your life, by the way. It's not like you had to be dour in your marriage. But if marriage is seen in the culture as expressivism, expressive individualism, which is all in our culture, and now it's infiltrated marriage, that not only marriage exists for me, it exists to make me happy. And so a marriage is celebrated as long as both partners feel like it's working out well for both of them to fulfill their identity. But not only is that type of marriage celebrated, actually and strangely, divorce is celebrated in that context when that isn't working anymore. And so that's, you can do that. It's a free country. You see, it's just not the Christian ideal. Now every now and then I get a wild hair in my office and that's not always good. Usually if I'm tired and I've done this now a few times and maybe to drive home to the point I wanna get off of this point, but I think you need something to drive home. So, ⁓ man, I don't know how many weddings I've done. I've done more funerals than weddings, but I've done a lot of weddings. And usually before we do the wedding, the couple comes and they get premarital counseling and I give them a marital inventory called prepare and rich and ask them a series of like 500 different questions and it attest them across like 10 areas of compatibility. And so then we sat down and review the data. And so that data usually reveals, it's always interesting to do this because It's no right wrong question. just make a statement or the the question there makes a statement and the and they you agree or disagree or strongly agree or strongly disagree and then they just line up your answers and all kinds of stuff comes out of that questionnaire. ⁓ I'll say well you said that when when my partner talks I don't think they listen and you said you agreed with that and you disagree with that. And they go, you said that? And then a little fight ensues, you know, in my office. And we try to calm it back down. We learn a lot. And usually the couples that do well, I've had a few couples who've pressed me and they say, you know, Rusty, we really want to live a Christian marriage. And I said, that's great. And I said, you what the Bible says? Yeah, we know what the Bible says. They said, well, we're just not sure we get in the picture. I said, well, are you in for a fun activity? They said, I guess so. Now you got to stick with me. If you zone out on this. you will lose what I'm saying. Okay? Listen carefully. There's a therapeutic technique. You ready for it? It's called sculpturing. Oh yeah. So you don't know where I'm going now. Okay, good. So I'll tell the couple in my office, stand up. They're like, stand up. I said, yeah, stand up. I said, now think about all the relational dynamics that you've talked through. And sometimes, I would never say this. I keep my mouth shut in counseling. I know you don't believe that. I keep my mouth shut. Here I talk a lot. I said, stand up. They say, okay. I said, this is I want you to do. This is interesting thing about a sculpture. A sculpture is still, it doesn't move, but it's so intricately carved that as you look at it, you almost can see all kinds of things. Do know what I'm saying? Okay, good. Okay. So I tell the couple, I said, if we were to sculpture your relationship, I want to see how it would look like. then I've had... just... this is the last one I remember. I don't think it's the last one, but it's the last one I remember. The woman said, I'm a lot. I said, well, I didn't say that. Okay. And she goes, I'm a lot. I said, well, that's a good exercise to know that. And the guy says, yeah, and I do a lot to try to keep her calm. I said, okay, well there we have it ladies and gentlemen. I said, would you, you want to sculpture that for me? And so she kind of leans down on him and he kind of... And they're laughing, we're having a good old time. But they don't know the pastor never does anything without intention. And I said, that's what your marriage looks like right now. I said, what would that sculpture look like if it was Christ in the church? And he goes, ⁓ I'd have to stand up a little bit and I'd have to lead. And she goes, I'd probably keep my mouth shut more. I said, well, you said it. And then a really good conversation ensues. Let me say this. Your marriage is not about your marriage. The ultimate marriage is not husband and wife. The ultimate marriage, the marriage supper of the lamb will be with Christ and His church. And a Christian marriage is not here for fulfillment or romance, although all of those are nice. A Christian marriage is here to bear witness to a greater marriage in this feeble relational partnership, covenant that we have between husband and wife. And it's for the purpose of honoring God and, when possible, procreation, raising up the next generation to the glory of God. Our world would do well to hear those truths more clearly again. Let's notice this second big idea. To put Christ over all of life, Christ should be honored in our work and society. Another tough series of texts, verse 22, slaves obey your human masters in everything. Don't work only while being watched in order to please them, but work wholeheartedly fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, do it enthusiastically as someone, as something done for the Lord and not for men. knowing that you will receive the reward of an inheritance from the Lord, you serve the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for whatever wrong he has done and there is no favoritism. Master, supply your slaves with what is right and fair, since you know that you have a master in heaven." Now this is another tough topic. Anytime the issue of slavery and the New Testament comes up, people have a ton of questions. me give you a few simple answers. Number one, Christianity cut the heart out of slavery because it affirms the equality of humans. And so ⁓ first and foremost, if you see here in the text, the earliest Christians began to do something that we ought to take notice of. They saw the institution for what it was, but internally they cut the heart out of it and made it something fundamentally different in the context of the Christian church. Secondly, If anybody says the earliest Christians didn't slaves to be free, 1 Corinthians 7, 21, Paul says to the Christian slaves, if you can be free, be free. Additionally, if anyone says the Bible is not concerned about the liberation of slavery, then we ought to notice that the first great act of God in the book of Exodus is the liberation of the slaves out of Egypt. Seems like God was concerned about it there. And in Luke 4, when Jesus delivers his opening great sermon in Nazareth, He says he's come to proclaim the gospel and to set free the oppressed. So the Bible from one end to the other has something to say about this. Additionally, the reason that slavery ended in America was because it was greatly influenced by the end of the slave trade in Europe, in Britain to be particular. William Wilberforce was a British politician and an evangelical Christian who worked through the British parliament. to end slavery in Britain. was, and that happened before it ended in America. The American abolitionists looked over into Britain and noticed that it was possible and feasible, and that engendered people like Abraham Lincoln to try to end it here. Additionally, there would be no civil rights movement in America had it not been for Martin Luther King Jr., who did not describe himself as a politician but a pastor, and believed in the equality of all races. because of a deep belief in the image of God. And so the reality is Christianity has done a great deal of societal good primarily because it has embraced a truth that societies historically have not embraced. And that is that humans are created in the image of God and have inherent dignity and worth. Aside from that issue, Christians think about work in a different way. We show up to work and work not because the boss is good. We show up and work and work because God is good and we're serving Him not the boss. And additionally, if we're in a place of authority ⁓ and we have people under us and we feel like we can wield authority, the Bible says be careful how much authority you wield unwisely because I don't care what authority you think you are, there's always authority over the authority and His name is Jesus. And so all of these ideas are pushing and pulling us in so many different directions to inform the way that we live. Thirdly, and the third point today is to put Christ over all of life. Christ should be honored through our witness to non-Christians. You say, okay, I'm good at the home, I'm good at work. Well, what about the wider community? Verse two says, devote yourselves to prayer. Stay alert in it with Thanksgiving at the same time. Pray also for us that God may open a door for us for the message to speak the mystery of the Messiah for which I am in prison so that I may reveal it as I am required to speak. Walk in wisdom towards outsiders, making the most of the time. Your speech should always be gracious, seasoned with salt so that you may know how you should answer each person. Listen, you have an obligation to your neighbor. You have obligation to the lost. You should be praying every day. only God, may I have a Christian home. God, not only should I function well in the place of where I work. God, may I have a witness to the community, to the world. Pray for us that we may have an open door, Paul says, for to speak the mystery of the Messiah. I think for many evangelicals, you wake up every morning and say, I have an obligation to my neighbor. God, may you open the door literally so I can speak to them. For many people, that's not in their heart. But it should be in the heart of the Christian if all of Christ is over all of life. And furthermore, it's not just enough to have the message. Paul says that we ought to have a life that is compelling, life that is transformed, that we ought to, verse 5, walk in wisdom towards outsiders. We ought to make the most of our time, that our speech and life should be something that is compelling. And if that's not enough, we have to be responsible. and to honor Christ in the church. The fourth and final point is to put Christ over all of life. Christ should be honored in the church and in our relationships. Listen carefully, the term church means community. That's what it means. And a church that ceases to be a community of relationships gathered together for the purpose of ministry, listen carefully, is no longer much of a church. And so, I have said so often I wanted not just a church service, I wanted a church community. wanted people that know one another and love one another and set for service with one another and for the world. And I want you just to hear this final few words in Colossians, the deep relationships that Paul has with so many. Notice verse 7, it says, Tychicus, a love brother, a faithful servant. and a fellow slave in the Lord will tell you all the news about me. I have sent him to you for this very purpose so that you may know how we are and that he may encourage your hearts. He is with Onesimus, our faithful and loved brother, who is one of you. They will tell you about everything here. Aristarchus, my fellow prisoner, greets you as does Mark Barnabas' cousin. concerning whom you have received instruction if he comes to you welcome him. And so does Jesus who is called justice. These alone of the circumcision are my co-workers for the kingdom of God and they have been a comfort for me. Apaphras who is one of you, a slave of Christ Jesus, greets you. He is always contending for you in his prayers so that you can stand mature and fully assured in everything God's wills. For I testify about him that he works hard for you. for those in Laodicea and for those in Heropolis. Luke, the beloved physician in Demas, greets you. Give my greetings to the brothers in Laodicea and to Nimphah and the church in her house. And when this letter has been read among you, have it read also in the church of the Laodiceans and see that you also read the letter from Laodicea. Tell Archipas, pay attention to the ministry you have received in the Lord so that you may accomplish it. This greeting is in my own hand, Paul. Remember my imprisonment. Grace be with you. I want to point out two things. First, a trivia question so I can just go ahead and answer it and second, a few relationships and then I'm done. I wonder, did anybody pick up on, I don't think you did, the 930 service didn't either. So sometimes I question my life decisions when I preach. Notice, just put, just so nobody bring, I'm going to answer a trivia question. Put verse on the board here for me on the screen. All right. Here's your trivia question for the day. Let's see if you zoned out at the end and when this letter has been read among you, the letter to the Colossians. Have it read also at the Church of the Laodiceans and see that you also read the letter from the lost letter of Paul. So they say on the basement podcast. You see? So is this the lost letter of the Laodiceans? No. You ready for a simple answer? A simple answer is this. The New Testament letters were circulated. So notice the letter to the Colossians, the letter to the Colossians was gonna be read in Colossae and then sent to Laodicea. Good. These were not just read in one place, they were read in every place. And this is what we know. The letter to the Ephesians, which Ephesus is near Colossi, got circulated so much in Asia Minor in Turkey that they couldn't hardly remember where it first went to. Do you understand this? It's the letter to Ephesus, but it circulated so much that we actually have manuscripts. where they didn't know where it originally was sent to because it had been everywhere. the most likely explanation here is the letter from Laodicea is the letter that was first to Ephesus. Mystery solved. No lost letters. That won't make you a good podcast, but it's an imminently simple answer. There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. The lost letter of Laodicea has been found. It's Ephesians. Okay, I sat through too many PhD seminars to know that and you to care so little about it, but nevertheless. Let me end on this. Did you hear all the relationships? The church is a series of relationships. Every member, a minister, we know each other, we love each other, we serve each other for the purpose of serving Christ. This series is over. You ought to ask yourselves. Does my home look like it's under Christ's Lordship? This is the place where I work. Do I function under Christ's Lordship? In the church, do I serve under Christ's Lordship? And in the wider world, do I live and share under Christ's Lordship? The goal for the Christian is all of Christ over all of life. I said this six weeks ago before we began, the truth is all of Christ probably isn't going to be over all of our life until heaven. But my appeal is to pick an area today and say, God, in this area, in my home, in my work, in my church, in the society, may there be more of Christ over me in that area. That's my prayer. If you're here today and you're not a Christian, say, Rusty, what does it take to be a Christian? To turn from sin and self and put your faith and trust in Jesus Christ. I'll be here, Pastor Ishmael will be here. We'll take a Bible and show you that you can be a Christian. Let's pray. Heavenly Father, we pray. God, we pray for our graduates today. We pray for all of us today that wherever we may be found, whatever season of life we're in, whatever station of life we find ourselves in, God, we would serve you. And God, may it be for us more of Christ in more of our life. Holy Spirit of God, reveal to us areas where our life needs to be conformed more to you. And God, may we live on the foundation of Jesus Christ. May we build our life on His words. God, may we imitate Him as we live before Him, in Jesus' name. Amen.