Sina Ganster: Hello, Diva Alina. Nah. Alina: Hello! Yes, new week. I'm to I'm really excited. Sina Ganster: Hi, how are you? New week, new podcast recording. Yes, I'm really excited. So, how the week? What's new? Alina: Oh, exhausting. Many business trips. But I was in our home once I enjoyed the sun bit. Yes, in Saarbrücken. It was beautiful. Some people don't I had a business trip to Koblenz. I then went on to Ahrweiler. I wanted to the Ahr valley. That's really nice. So wine tourism in the Ahr valley. You remember when you... Sina Ganster: ⁓ really? ⁓ nice. How did it that you ended Alina: maybe a little time in Germany. And then in Eifel, visited my family and then just went to Saarland. And that without a that's something else. More quality time, more peace and so on. And I it a little bit and we had such a bombastic weather. So Saarbrücken can sometimes be seen. Sina Ganster: Okay. ⁓ mega, yes. No, it's also mega nice when you're sitting at the market or at the river bank, in the cool weather, at the start. No, that's definitely always really nice. Yes, very classic. No. there's something new, yes, somehow not so much. So we a lot. Alina: Yes, exactly, we sat in the market. Yes, really nice. Yes, great, what good news you? Sina Ganster: Maybe I have one less and that's I have more free time. I the day off. I Friday, Saturday, Sunday, longer weekends and spend the day off with Mara. That means I have more time with her over the week. I it's really nice to one more day with her. She's in an age where it's so much fun to with It's always fun. But she really little, it was also really nice. But now I the phase is so beautiful because she laughs with you and interacts with And she to your jokes. You can tickle her and so on. It's all really nice. Alina: ⁓ sweet. Nice. Yeah, it's cool when they get Sina Ganster: I think it's really cool. thought it would be really exhausting, but It's just nice to you all time. Alina: ⁓ great, sounds really nice. Sina Ganster: Okay. would say we jump right into the stories today. And I little... I have little something prepared. Alina: Yeah, Tammy. Sina Ganster: Die Überschrift lautet, ich bin verbittert, seit ich abgenommen habe. Ich bin ehrlich gesagt extrem verbittert, seit ich abgenommen habe und plötzlich anders behandelt werde. Ich bin eine Frau und habe ungefähr 30 Kilo verloren. Und ja, ich bin unglaublich stolz darauf. Ich habe hart dafür gearbeitet. It sounds like I'm complaining, even I should But the truth is, I'm getting more and more bitter, and I don't know how to deal In I thought, if I I'll this and that, my life will better. But instead, I feel like I've real bitch. The reason is simple. People treat me differently. Family members who used to overlook me now me everything. Suddenly I important to their plans. Men I used like and who no interest in me now friends or family, bring me with you. That makes me angry. I am still the same person as before, only with 30 kg more. But back they didn't see me or they didn't me. or it didn't matter to I spend a lot of time crying it because I still feel like this woman who suffered I am happy with my appearance now, but I hate what the behavior of people brings. Now everyone I have mean because I have but actually I just tell how shitty they treated me and that... and that they are only interested me now. It's just frustrating. Maybe I should just be and my new life. Alina: Okay, great. ⁓ Great story. First of good. Good job. Good job that she took That's mega strong. I just hoped that it self-worth. Sina Ganster: Yeah. No. Probably something she still to work or what is an inner work and not just an external work. So that you somehow take and then you have great self-worth. But I really the problem here is more just somehow this toxic society that we have. So I totally felt what she was Alina: Hmm. Sina Ganster: I think what we in society is a brutal pretty privilege. that's simply when you the beauty ideal, you massive disadvantages, social disadvantages. That means you more excluded, you not invited, you not respected. This can be among friends, family or even professionally. And vice versa, very massively, if you the beauty ideal, then you are included, then you seen. And she right now, really very strongly on her own body, that it makes a lot of these 30 kilos, which she probably only for herself, which she maybe for health reasons. But that it then has such a massive effect. how she is being treated. You have to digest that. Because that is being in front of her eyes. Alina: So would you say that what she perceives, that you say it's true? So it's not just her perception, but it's definitely the that she treats differently. I wouldn't have that it for friends, I would have really hoped that... Sina Ganster: Yes, because you might be in a healthier bubble. It really depends on who you're And if you're in a not so healthy bubble, where it's about the outer, or I know, it be that people suddenly nicer to you. if you, as I said, with the beauty ideal. But yes, I think it's very, very real and I think that's the reason why so many people... ...and you get super advantages, you get seen, you get invited and with naturally that to your weight So realistic what she's here. It shouldn't be that and I also think that glaube... friends are shit. that this is happening and that it being taken account. But it seems to very real situation. Alina: Maybe I think about it. I had thought that you would bit different when you You identify with more, you show yourself more, you are different, you because you feel That does a lot with you. Sina Ganster: Mm-hmm. Alina: And I could understand if there a guy who never talked to me and then he suddenly talks to me. Then would think, yes, you don't to come But that now men, who she also liked suddenly more of her. I would also fooled by that. And would think, is that really all about the outer? Or is it really her expression that somehow carries her positive character more to the outside? if you insecure, hold back a lot. I I had this slowness issue, but there definitely phases in my life when I didn't pretty at And above all, not as pretty as many in my environment, for example. And I think that the time, that mindset did with me. Sina Ganster: Hmm. Yeah. Absolutely, I'm 100 % right. Yes, yes, totally. I also that if you good and if you're in the right place, you also a ray of I think that's also very common for people, women and men, who don't necessarily the ideal of If they come in and have a ray light, Alina: That's what I mean. Sina Ganster: I don't know, a crazy radiance because they are because they feel beautiful Then they outwards. And yes, you if you are in the right place Alina: But I think if I really the feeling that people only me because that, then I think you only better. That you don't other people differently or just look differently. But it's like that. So, all series I thought it last time. There are just series, they talk lot about feminist and female things. Sina Ganster: Hmm. Alina: So, that's not how identify. Sina Ganster: time. Absolutely, that's just such an unrealistic picture that is generally drawn by women in series, films, everywhere. it's always and everywhere. I think it's a little better now. We have a little more authenticity. Alina: Mm. Sina Ganster: I think it's so ridiculous when they're already in bed and I think to what the fuck. Who doesn't that? But back then you really that, you were blind for Alina: You Sina Ganster: Yes, it's just a totally distorted image that you have of women. And especially, I always of as a 30-year-old or mid-30s. Yes, we know a little bit how the rabbit runs. But yes, especially for younger generations or teenagers, it's totally fatal to always such a distorted image of And yes, it's also what that to them, when you somehow take and you get compliments all A lot is I was pregnant and now I'm not pregnant anymore. And accordingly, I lost weight. Alina: Hmm. Sina Ganster: And I notice that very often, for example when I'm Carlos' that they comment a Oh, Sina, you lost again, you lost kilos again, and on, and you look And I find that totally toxic. I don't they in that moment. Alina: ⁓ yeah. Sina Ganster: But somehow I a strange feeling, I don't that the first thing that comes into my apartment or into a family is directly on my body. At the time I to if they say have I taken it in or do like or whatever. It gives me a strange, insecure feeling. I it an absolute no-go and I got used that I don't do Maybe when I younger I gave a friend a compliment like, oh you look or you great here or something like said I'm not innocent, but I've long time now. I don't comment on the body I don't think belongs to And it's toxic. And whole society should stop Alina: Yes, I don't it anymore. I had the a few months ago, I didn't see that a famous pregnant was She just herself, she well, I didn't accept But I didn't comment because it could have exactly the And what am I Oh, you're probably pregnant. You either. So that sense I anything. And have to say that I am very slim and almost too slim, but I actually had this my family that I the saying again or got it said again, like, oh, I mean, you have very thin. Sina Ganster: Yeah. Alina: And I said, guys, do you to another 20 years? You've 35 years or 20 years, I know. I think it's really okay now. In my breasts also because I that many breasts. I have a very small, cute A-corp and I love it. And I... Oh, my butt just burst Sina Ganster: Hmm. Yeah. Alina: But yeah, it's just story, people. And honestly, there's another point. Now I'm very slender, so I don't on anyone whether they've or not. I say something like, you look great when I think the person has a great expression. Sina Ganster: Yeah, I can still try for steam. Yeah, totally. Alina: shaming in all directions. ⁓ And mom shaming is also included. And think should just leave Just if you like and... ⁓ That's nice. And... Maybe back to our protagonist. would be cool ⁓ if she maybe... ⁓ Sina Ganster: Of course. Yeah, total. Alina: and their energy to that they it better, can cool and proud of themselves, and can express and everything behind, or the people who belong Sina Ganster: Absolutely. think at the beginning you something very good about self-esteem. I think that would be the next step. She worked on losing those 30 kilos. The next step would to some inner work. As long she hasn't done that, I can't judge But she's not that person anymore... Alina: Hmm? Sina Ganster: Yes, the 7.5kg was 30kg, but she just self-confidence and self-esteem. And I also advise you to your friends a little bit. Of can really choose but what I do, I would just address So really, yes. If people make comments or suddenly interested or they suddenly include you, then I would that with them. Alina: Yeah, yeah, he does. It's cool. He recognized it. It's cool. Sina Ganster: Yes, totally. And it's also cool that she really rest So she could also say, yes, awesome, my life is super cool now and it's cool, I'm being included now, but she really questions this whole process and I it's super reflected by her. And she'll do it differently Alina: Hmm. Yeah, that would be cool if it comes Sina Ganster: Okay, the second story. My husband has a problem with my book club. I wrote here once that my husband has problem with me going to book club I thought we would solved this but apparently not. Yesterday evening after dinner I said, hey, just so you know, I have book club And he answered, no, you don't And then on, it escalated He got so angry that I our almost 10 years of marriage. I tried to make tell me specifically what exactly his problem is, because I really don't understand He said, is not a book club, this is a drinking club. You hardly about the book. And I said, yes, we but even if not, why is it so important To summarize, I never come home maybe a little bit drunk, but I can normally. I really tried to find what bothers But was one argument after the other. And honestly, I of it. Everything I ask him for is one or two evenings a month with my girlfriends. He that's too much. I asked what wouldn't too much And he said, every three or four months. And then he said, we should only mutual friends, so only spend time together as not separated In the end we a dead end. I wanted to continue talking, but he himself in a room and the door. I went In the of the night he me up and says, I should come to the living room, we have to talk. That made me pretty unsure, because he had never done before. I sit down and he asks, how often do you actually about other men? and how hot they are. He my mobile phone while I was The worst he found was messages with a friend about my celebrity crush, some gossip about my ex and joke about a sugar daddy. So, a normal girl talk. I don't about other men, so I that he was But he wanted me apologize and promise never to again. I this insecure, and irrational man. Or maybe I and I it now. I don't know what to but I know that I won't give A social life is important to and it will stay that One evening a month, maybe two. I love him, but I really what Alina: Well... Okay, so... I would just say that he's for a fault in her because he's right? That's not normal. Yes! Why? Sina Ganster: Really? I don't it's normal. I think it's really weird. She writes, tell me why you don't want And doesn't up with a proper explanation. But I think it's really dubious. Alina: Yeah, but someone who... I don't know, but I do that... I I don't know... I do believe that people who have something to hide first, have of distrust. And I do believe that... Why is he so obsessed with finding how sharp she finds other guys? Sina Ganster: Mm-hmm. Mmhm, stimmt ja. Alina: Probably he has to his own nose. I think... Because... Yes, a kind of meddling. Because this meddling, I'm now and I don't want you to something with others and so on. That's apparently totally incomprehensible because it's not close to But for him apparently much more understandable. So he has something to hide. Sina Ganster: Irgendwas stimmt da nicht. Mm-hmm. Absolutely, he a secret, I hear. No, very well analyzed, definitely. And what he actually wants is full control. Because apparently these two evenings a month are apparently the only evenings where she goes with the girls if you can say In the end it's a book club and they're probably in the bar talking a little about the book and drinking, one or two cocktails and that's it. Alina: I'm a room but I'm the opinion. Yeah, safe. Sina Ganster: But at that moment he not there and can't control and that just him That's he suggests that they should only common friends and only with them so that he is always there and nothing can So extremely toxic. yes, I didn't first, that he could have a secret or something that dirt on the track and that's why it's so weird. But reminds me of a friend I had. It was her ex-ex-ex-friend, it's been a long time. He a guy who was so ultra-control, he always to so precisely, he had a lot of problems when she did so mega mega toxic. And then at some point that he cheated her a with other women. We love that. He had a lot of That the proof that he control over her and always wanted what she was Because he, as you said, was actually... Alina: Mm. Lieben wir. Sina Ganster: probably much shit on his that he's afraid that she might build the same shit as he does. So if she out maybe she with other guys or she does something. No idea. Alina: I have in or before you said that, that's almost a proof, I was thinking if there is another loss or why he thinks that she could leave or he could too much on the outside or could fun outside of the relationship. He feels threatened that she fun outside of the relationship. And that has something to with loss. And then you have ask yourself why do I have loss fears? Why does the guy think that there loss? And maybe he has... Sina Ganster: Yeah. Yes, at the beginning I about topic of but what kind of person he is self-worth feeling. Because at the beginning I it's really his topic, what he does below, after scrolling through his phone, which is an absolute no-go. Alina: or he has another topic. Hmm. Sina Ganster: that he says, oh yes, you're talking about men. So that he might be so afraid that he as a boyfriend is in a girl round. That we're talking about, oh, he's like this and in bed, he does this and that and this that. What is real, I to we women sometimes themeate one or the with our partners in our friend groups. But who cares? No, so... That was my first instinct, that he has such a weak self-esteem and issues, that he has panic anxiety, what is being Then you what else a feeling, but that was a very small feeling when I read that. Alina: Hmm, yep. Sina Ganster: I thought, why does he have problem that she meets this friend group? I thought, maybe he something on with a friend of hers or a friend of hers that she meets now knows a secret of his or something like that. I know, he him Tinder or whatever. I thought somehow... that she the circle she has. He also please, we should only have mutual friends and meet together. So maybe really to of this girl group. I thought, maybe he has something on with a girlfriend. I very far. It was just a short thought that I had. But something will happen. That's for sure. Something is with this guy. Alina: This is also a story he heard from someone he knows. maybe there is also a story where he knows that she on her guy and she also always to a book blog and so it all started and some point it all flew Sina Ganster: Hmm. In a book club. In a girls book club. There's not even a guy in think. As I understood it, it's only girls. Alina: No, but maybe it's the other one. Maybe it's affair of the guy in this book club. Or the woman. I don't But it's possible. So definitely some fears. Sina Ganster: crazy. This book club makes him very nervous. this feeling stronger again. One person in this book club might pose a danger to That's he doesn't want her Alina: I think for men, women's are always bit problematic. think they're all bit scared of what we're But... I think Sina Ganster: Really? I don't know. mean, actually, I... If you're insecure, you're scared. But I don't know. I'm the I'm 0.0 scared when Carlos is in a men's round. Alina: Nah, not that bad of course. Sina Ganster: I've never about it. And they will comment on us but... I don't know. Who cares? Alina: Yes, it's something different. We are self-confident, but I think men sometimes especially in times of feminism, the rising or blooming feminism, they have to reinvent and sort But of not in the open. Such dimensions are already crazy. But a little bit, I think. Sina Ganster: Ah, they get That they get yes. What is the consequence for him? That he says, can meet a friend again, because I what is Alina: No, that's definitely... It's weird that he's your phone. I think that's a bit mean. Well, not only mean, I just a bit... Sina Ganster: It's absolute no-go. think it's such big loss She doesn't on and says, okay, he scrolled and so on. But I think it's such massive of trust. I've with Carlos. I've in my previous relationship. Maybe I as a or as a 20-year-old can't say I forgot. But I think it's an absolute no-go. I think if you need it, scrolling phone from someone else or from a partner, you should just the relationship before Because it just you don't trust anyone. And trust is the basis. If you trust your partner, then it me anymore. Because what do you if you trust anyone? What does that You're always shaking. He's his phone writing and you ask yourself, is he writing with another woman? He goes out and meets people. You he's another woman or... Alina: Mm. Sina Ganster: and if you start that you thoughts in that direction, it doesn't sense anymore. If you really with your thoughts, I'm for the phone now, vice versa, if someone to me, I would be extremely hurt and would definitely be a reason Or would definitely be a reason to into the partherapy or something. But I wouldn't that easily. I have access to Carlos' he access to my phone, I have his codes, he has mine. Not because I always his code, but because I want to his photos, because he a photo or vice versa. But even though I access to his phone, I have never WhatsApp. Because I think these his private conversations. And I nothing to lose and would never look it. Just out of respect. Alina: Mm, yep. Sina Ganster: Even if he probably... There's nothing. But probably he'll with a friend or something. But who cares? I Alina: Yeah, of the secret is simple. I don't the post I still have a bit of an eye on If the person it from me, I think, what are you up to? But... I'm already... Sina Ganster: time. Yeah, of course. Maybe I... If someone is always their phone or something. So, like this. You like this, Alina: Yes. I also it a bit weird when someone always their phone with them and takes with to the toilet and all that stuff. But yes, I don't definitely it's... He made really obvious. He kind of... Well, something to be but he his distrust openly at the point. So it's not like he... So the man from the story now shows his distrust openly. Sina Ganster: Yeah, then I would too. I don't know if I these props. Okay, he shows it openly. Nice for him. I think it's still very toxic. I think toxic what he's I conversation is completely toxic of him. Also totally, as I said, super random what he's got against this book club. But at same time... Alina: Yeah, Sina Ganster: with the phone. Alina: Well, it's exciting for sure. Sina Ganster: Well, what do we now? How does it on? What should she do now? Alina: So, okay, if she were our girlfriend, what would we say? Sina Ganster: What would we say now? I would say... no... Oh, yes! I'll you! I'll tell you! That would the consequence. To through his cell phone... Because she would probably get fined. I don't she thought about it. Alina: Give me your phone! Yeah, it's definitely not but somehow I just thought... Sina Ganster: I'll on Reddit and give you idea of what he might Alina: It's definitely like you know, you quickly tend to for some topics but in this case I the topics completely with him. So he has be it really something not particularly cosy or something else, no idea. But I would definitely, he definitely to unpack at some point. Whether on the phone or otherwise, I have idea, but definitely to tell us what phase it is. Sina Ganster: Yes, it's just, as I said, Yes, his reaction That's they to get themselves. They probably have to dig a little further. That they find Yes. So imagine... I mean, imagine you're in a relationship. Then your boyfriend with a completely random topic that he doesn't want you to Or no, not your boyfriend, your husband. I think that's also so overbearing. So generally I think it's... Of of But I think it's generally overbearing that someone tells me what to and what not. So if I want my girlfriend, then I my girlfriend. Nobody has anything to talk Alina: Yeah, then I'll him first what... where it comes from. Sina Ganster: And ⁓ I think that's very extreme, that he's so determined, he writes as he formulated he hey, you know, I'm going to the book club And he says, no, you don't. So, huh, I decide here and you don't there. And I think that's totally extreme. So I'm a super free-loving person. I don't know if I much free-loving, but I'm someone who lot of free space and I'm very sensitive when someone tells me what to I that at all. And I would be completely exhausted. I don't know if I with who me orders. Who shouldn't do Alina: It to be I think all the time, if I in my status quo and my husband would from the higher heaven with such a story and say, I don't you XYZ then I don't know, I think I would laugh at first, because I think he can't that seriously. If I him, I would definitely assume that this not his seriousness. Sina Ganster: Mm-hmm. Alina: And maybe I the game. So just to it little bit. To see, okay, what do we do instead? What to Or what is your plan? Are to a book Just to challenge a little bit what this is supposed be. So a real command tone doesn't just like that. I think it would grow. I I'm serious. Sina Ganster: Yeah, we it yet. We don't any data or anything. She doesn't us anything about her relationship. Okay. I wish you the best. I you out what's on. My theory number one is that he's a lot of trouble and wants full control over her because he... Alina: Mm. Sina Ganster: Because he knows what to do behind someone else's Okay, dann weiter. Nächste Story. Alina: Okay. Sina Ganster: Men want children, like children want dog droppings. They often say that want children, like children a dog. And to it's just They want several children, invest their few minutes and then the man sits in the lock-up while the woman goes Pregnancy, birth and the complete responsibility afterwards. It is no wonder that men want so many children when they hardly expecting anything from My husband recently said it wouldn't be bad if I pregnant again. And I at the thought. He said he doesn't another child, but it wouldn't a world-end either. For me, yes. I don't want pregnancy anymore. It took two years for to half of my weight and I'm still with it. I don't to surgery anymore. The recovery after the first cut was hell and the idea of it again scares me. I don't want to about a newborn again or through this baby phase. I'm in the of the terrible twos. And it's just extremely exhausting. Men just that. They say things like, you're already over that's normal, all women And I just from men, but also from women. Even former colleagues pressured me to another child. Although I clearly said that I want to. They then shocked and ask, Why? And I say that I don't want again. It comes immediately, but your child needs a sister. And I just to why should I again? My body is finally again and the thought of getting pregnant again really relieves my fear. Honestly, I would rather quit. But I wouldn't tell because everyone is strictly against Alina: Yeah. That's really sick. had to expect that. ⁓ Sina Ganster: Was erwarten, was meinst du? Alina: It's to be that she and doesn't think Let's think about it. I don't even where to start, because it's just your body. Why the hell is there, I don't know, from every side, people who say, don't like that? know, pregnancy is really not daddy's And I found this entry, this, what's it Men want children like wolves. Sina Ganster: Or men want to have like they a dog. Oh, I'd like to have a dog. Okay, let's dog. Yeah, Alina: Yeah. Yeah. I think that many men who don't seem to much to do have no idea what that means for the body. You just lot with And I also with myself now, also my body, to say, pff, again, I don't know. So, and... Yeah, she's obviously happy with how things are going And then can stay with Sina Ganster: Absolutely. I had to of something like that, or a quote. It's easy to a father, but very few are really fathers. Alina: Yeah. Sina Ganster: I think it fits very well here. Like, let's a child, it's easy. You woman who pregnant That's quick. But as I said, and birth must the woman. But everything that comes that... It's for me at all that she writes that. That's this complete responsibility. Alina: Hmm. Sina Ganster: I would not describe that The text says that do not help. It says that the work with the children is only with the woman. Unfortunately, is mostly the But are many men who are doing really well. So it's a total no-go for me when a man pulls out of Unfortunately, away this side of and birth. After everything is up to the woman. And then I totally that she doesn't feel like having a second child. Not only her, but see a birth rate in Germany of 1.35 children per couple. Many women think that After having one child, you often don't a second That down to that the whole care work is the woman. And yes, why should you a second one? In addition to what she writes there, as I pregnancy was not good Apparently, was hell, as she writes with an cut and the recovery afterwards. Alina: Yeah, but a of... Yeah, I think, um... ...always very far from the work-off topic, Because I think, yes, that's how you say it, she seems to... ...well, she doesn't to help either, right? But now that other women say, don't so excited, the child is only happy when it a sister... ...that's I more my ears. Sina Ganster: Mm-hmm. Mm. Mmm, yeah. Alina: Because I... Yes, I think that's how... Every pregnancy is different, every body is different. That's just very... Yes, and think you shouldn't it so much. You can't just support by saying, hey, you don't want to, I understand you, then don't it. And are women who just don't children. Sina Ganster: It's too much for me to say. Alina: There are also more more women who say, somehow I don't right about saying I want children, it's topics or social topics or life circumstances, but it's just their decision. And of I would be more willing, or was more willing, to when the father is there. So I think I couldn't imagine getting a child when I wasn't sure that the really to be a Or the father really to father, let's that To the example. That was to me from very important, almost more important than the partnership itself. Sina Ganster: Hmm, that's true. Alina: But if she doesn't want she just doesn't to. And then to say, yes, do it, it's not that bad. I'm just so crazy. Hey, hello. Of it's the worst thing. So it can also a risk pregnancy. It can even be that something the child. Sina Ganster: Yeah, also. I that he... It's just that nobody cares. Who cares about that? But your child needs a little Totally overbearing. I'm actually experiencing the same now. Because we have one daughter and we only one child. First of now. I never, but our plan is to one child. That many reasons. And doesn't matter why it is It's our decision, we talked But you have one child and then all the questions When will the second And single children, at all. then they be totally misled or whatever. There are also many stigmas and The child would be alone and isolated and whatever. ⁓ Alina: a daughter and... ⁓ Sina Ganster: Fuck off, what this? Who is this for? I know, I find myself very over-reacting. I lot of wrong thoughts. I don't hear from my friends. I just have great friends who are such a shit. When I hear that, it's actually more from former colleagues or distant relatives who always such a stupid question. Alina: I understand the thought Especially because I... You too, we as siblings. That was nice, somehow. I always it was nice. I mean, okay, that's a shame. It went differently for me. It's different, but... So cool single children, know? I mean, let's at our friendships. There are also super cool single children involved. And they just had more friends for or tried to make friends. And I wouldn't say that a single child confused It's not like that Sina Ganster: Absolute. Honestly, I have two siblings. We played very closely was a of age difference. I also had brothers. My two brothers mostly their stuff. I another thing I focused on friends. Maybe that's also reason why I don't feel the urge to a little sibling. But it's also very important We have a big circle of There are more more children And we do a lot of in the circle of with the child. It's really like that with us in the week always many people somehow in our apartment comes. It also to that we live in Spain and I have a Spanish partner here. In Spain in general just a super extroverted country where a lot is together and a lot is and so on. And I just don't it at all that somehow there is the danger that there should any social consequences that my child doesn't... Schwesterchen hat. Alina: Okay, now I'm a tricky question, Sina. If your first child was a son, would you still a daughter? Would you still a daughter? Sina Ganster: fragment. ⁓ god. Alina: Kras, oder? Sina Ganster: Also, ich muss sagen, dass ich es total schön finde eine Tochter zu haben. And I've wanted a girl, but I think I can't answer Because the thing is, I had a preference for a girl, because I an inner desire to a girl. But a boy would be nice and okay. And think that when the boy is it will be just as beautiful. And this wish that you have a second child, maybe it's girl or something, that it bit more that. Alina: But that's is quite often. Many still a child, also because of gender issue. Sina Ganster: Hmm... Yeah. Alina: That's what often, you say, another girl or maybe another boy. Something like that. That's what often. Sina Ganster: Yes, and I'm honest here. I feel a little uncomfortable to tell that I this preference for a girl. Because it doesn't so right to have that But it's just how I felt. We for the gender and I hoped it was a girl. And it a girl and then Alina: Hmm, I see that. ideas. Sina Ganster: It pretty nice for me. Alina: Yeah, but I think it's just that we can easier with girls. Right? So I... Sina Ganster: Yes, I think so too. I only women as my girlfriends. I could be good with a man, but I've never had a very good boyfriend I might connect better with women. Alina: Hmm. I don't so bad judging. I think it's a bit... As I think you identify with girls a bit easier and then you're with a little girl, so cute and so on. And if it a boy, it would have been a super cool boy. In the end, totally ridiculous. But I would have really asked myself, I would really asked myself if I a boy, because... Sina Ganster: Absolute. Absolute. Alina: You you think about names and things And you always both of them. We had a girl's than a boy's name. That was also a And I just asked if I a boy now, maybe I have tried to get a girl. So you don't have ask Maybe vice versa, I want a boy again. I don't because I also a little brother. Sina Ganster: Hmm. Mm. Alina: and a cool brother. But that's why I asked because many people decide a bit from the premise. Sina Ganster: Yeah, no, I can totally understand. ⁓ ⁓ würd sagen wir sind durch. ⁓ Then I say ⁓ thank you for listening and we'll you in the next podcast episode. Alina: And, choo choo!